Everytime I meet more family members I have to restrain myself from asking where the Chocolate Factory is.

Hey and howdy, fair Mustard denizens. Another week come and gone and another entry into the blogosphere.

Do you think Major League Baseball is thanking Jesus, Allah and Buddha for the way that three out of the four American League playoff spots are going to be decided this weekend in the Red Sox/Yankee and White Sox/Indian series? The ratings are going to be through the roof. This is the most exciting season final weekend possibly ever. And baseball is gonna cash in.

So the NHL starts up soon and despite screwing their fans over last season and currently having absolutely no big star or even a halfway decent team, the Washington Capitols have not lowered the prices on any of their tickets. Are they @#$%ing kidding me?! How they hell do they think they’re gonna turn a profit by pissing off their fans even more by charging 50 freaking bucks for decent seats!?! Am I still gonna go to a few games? Yeah, cause I love hockey. But you think I’m gonna be as likely to just randomly catch a game on a weekend like with the Nats? Not bleeping likely. Wankers.

So Serenity is out in 2 days. Yes, I am freaking excited to see this. Hell, I’m even being good and avoiding as many spoilers as I can. By the way, props to Mr. Griffin for actually managing to convince his school to allow him to show Firefly in class as a “future of space exploration” unit. Now that’s funny. Go see this movie. Seriously, do it. I mean you know I’m just going to review it next week and then tell you to go see it, so why wait? Be proactive.

Music You Should Be Listening To:

Weezer – Make Believe

Beverly Hills is just one of the best windows down, sing at the top of your lungs songs to come out in a long time. Perfect Situation reminds me a lot of a Keene song, if it was done by Weezer, with its piano-lead verses before kicking into a pure guitar rockin’ chorus. This Is Such a Pity has a great little 80’s synth beat. Hold Me and The Damage In Your Heart is pure great old school Weezer. This a great album and the best since Weezer’s Blue Album in my humble opinion.

Beck – Guero

So you didn’t like the melancholy sadness of Sea Change? You long for the crazy, slightly off-beat Beck of Odelay? Here ya go. Enjoy. Combining just about every musical genre you can think of, this album is as far away away from Sea Change as you can get. Combing funk (E-pro), hip-hop (Hell Yes), techno (Summer Girl), indie rock (Scarecrow) and Spanish rap (Que Onda Guero) (Guero means white boy in Spanish. For more Spanish words for white boy, consult Sean Griffin), this album is another great driving/party album.

New and notes:

Did you watch Arrested Development on Monday? I have my bat standing by.

Veronica Mars premiere tonight. Why did those bastards at UPN schedule it at the same time as Lost? Thank God for Tivo.

Curb Your Enthusiam is back and hasn’t missed a beat. From the Ted Danson cameo to Richard Lewis “stealing” Larry’s sandwich name to the ticket scalper for Temple this show continues to be the Dark Seinfeld (wow, that just sound kind of evil, doesn't it?).

The only thing keeping me from swearing off watching the recent crapfest of O.C. episodes is that Erin borrowed season 1 on DVD and some of the early episodes are hilarious on so many levels. Peter Gallagher really was so effing funny the first season.

Something I missed in last week’s Emmy post: Scrubs ended up winning the best multi-camera editing Emmy for its spoof on the multi-camera sitcom episode. I find that infinitely hilarious. Also rumors abound that it could come back as soon as October. Do it NBC, do it!

Until next time:

“Who gets passed by a van full of nuns? Oh wait, who? Cohen does!”

“Well, they have God on their side ok, Summer? I’m not going to beat Jesus.”

Well, since no one submitted any nicknames I was forced to give one to myself. In retrospect choosing the nickname “Doobie” wasn’t the best choice.

“So let me walk these coals til you believe I can cut the Mustard well enough”

Seriously, the Shins albums have been sitting at the top of my favorites list for a year now and if you don’t have them, I say there’s something wrong with you. Personally I prefer the newer Chutes Too Narrow but Oh Inverted World has New Slang on it which is just one of the best songs ever. There. I said it. Moving on.

Tough ND game last weekend with the loss to Michigan St but honestly, I’ll say it right now, I think this might have even been a good thing for them. Before you kill me for daring to suggest a loss was a good thing, let me explain. In the past when the Irish, coming off a big win, have come out flat and fallen behind in a game, they usually have just been steamrolled. This time they fell 21 points behind and rather than roll over, Brady Quinn (who had been sucking up to that point) led the comeback with an astounding quick pass game to tie it up and send it into overtime. Yes, they lost in overtime and that sucks but they didn’t die and that is something to be happy about. Cause I’ll tell you right now USC is going to be unbelievably tough and if the Irish even want to have a chance, they’re gonna need to fight for every inch and not give up if the Trojan’s take an early lead. Hehehe….Trojans.

My Giants are 2-0. Sweeeeeeet. Eli actually looked good Monday against the Saints. Too bad the Saints weren’t looking too good. A home game in New York? Sorry NFL, as great as that may have been for publicity, there’s no such thing as giving another team a “home” game in New York. Or New Jersey as the case may be.

One month til the big day. And yes I know I owe Erin like everything in the world for everything she’s done to get this wedding together. She’s amazing and this is why I’m marrying her. Well that and the way she can beat up Booter. That’s just funny.

So Lost is back. I’m proud of all of you who have come around and started watching it. Holy crap was that a good season premiere and the more I think about it, it was also good for someone who wanted to just start watching it. Yeah, you won’t get all the in depth background of the characters but I think you could pick up enough to understand what’s going on and be not too much more confused than the rest of us who have been watching it from the beginning.

As for the new shows:

Bones – not bad, I enjoyed the offbeat characters and I think you’ll enjoy it if you like crime procedurals ala CSI or Law and Order.

My Name is Earl – Verdict is still out on this one. I love Jason Lee, I think he’s hysterical. The first 2/3 of the pilot was spent setting up the rest of the series so I’ll give it a chance to see if it takes off from here.

Kitchen Confidential – This was actually really really funny and I recommend checking it out. Again it’s tough cause the pilot spends it’s time setting up the rest of the series but I definitely laughed hard during some of the scenes. Plus the cast is terrific. Any series with Zack from Wedding Crashers, Xander from Buffy, Harold from Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle and Sam from Freaks and Geeks is definitely worth checking out.

News and Notes:

One week until Serenity! Ok, people last chance, I'm begging you, if you've never seen Firefly before, despite my pleas to check it out, now is the time. This is the best sci-fi show to come along in years, bar none. Please, at least do me the favor of just watching the first 2 part pilot episode. Run out and rent it, or I'll loan it to you or hell, I'll burn a copy of it and you can watch it on your computer. Just check it out and if it doesn't make you want to see Serenity, ok. But I guarantee you, if you see the first episode, it'll hook you.

Hey look, Everybody Loves Raymond took the Emmys. I believe I predicted just about all of that. Congrats to Monk. Yay Lost. Ha, kiss my ass Will & Grace, no emmys for you. William Shatner over Terry O’Quinn? The hell? I’d also like to point out that William Shatner is the comic relief on Boston Legal and yet won best supporting actor in a DRAMA!!! And hilarious acceptance speech from the Arrested Development guys: “I’d like to remind you that once again you’re honoring us something you will not watch.”

Speaking of Arrested Development, it’s back and now on Mondays. There is NOTHING else to watch on Mondays at 8 o’clock, people. Start watching the show. If you seriously watch 7^th Heaven, Wife Swap, Surface or the King of Queens over this show I will personally come to your house and smash your TV with a bat because you do not deserve to own one.

Ok, reason # 498754 you should be watching Veronica Mars: Joss Whedon is now guest starring as a used car salesman. That makes Charisma Carpenter as a MILF, Kevin Smith as a Clerk, and Joss Whedon doing the dance of joy* this season. Friggin’ watch this show.

Holy crap did the O.C. suck last week. I mean truly truly sucked. And I’m not talking it’s-the-O.C.-it’s-not-really-supposed-to-be-award-winning sucked. I’m talking Joey sucked. I seriously hope whoever wrote that was fired.

Still working on writing Episode 6 but between the wedding and the impending move in 2 weeks, time is a little tight. I will get it going though, I promise.

Until next time:

“I just went off my post partum medications”
“You’re still taking that? You had Buster thirty two years ago.”
“And that’s how long I’ve been depressed about it.”

* I have no idea if he’ll be doing the dance of joy. But it would be pretty damn funny if he did.

It's an illusion, Michael. A trick is something a whore does for money... or candy!

It's an Arrested Development quote. How would I know what a whore does for candy?

Sorry for the long period in between updates. The office has been getting a little crazy lately and with the moving coming up and the impending nuptials it’s been nuts trying to finish of the strip and write the blog. So here we go:

Go Irish. Let me preface this by saying I’m not dancing for joy as much as many other Irish fans seem to be as I do remember 3 years ago, Ty’s first year, when he went 8-0 to start the season including a win over a top-10 ranked Michigan. Luckily I do have faith in Charlie Weiss and know he’s not giving the Rockne comparisons a second thought. That being said, how freakin’ cool was that win over Michigan in the Big House? Sloppy second half but that first drive was the best thing I’ve seen the Irish do in years (yeah, maybe I’m exaggerating but it was pretty damn cool). So for now let’s just say I’m pretty impressed with the Charlie Weiss era this far.

Mets = done. Man, that was rough. They get a taste of the Wild Card and then bam! Lose 9 out of 10 to effectively put them out of the running. Well I’m still going to a game when they’re in town next week. While a disappointing finish, they far surpassed my expectations. Willie Randolph just became the best thing to happen to the franchise in the last decade. Things are looking good for next year though. Carlos Beltran is a solid foundation to build that team around. Yes, he’s overpaid but that’s not his fault. They gave him that money. Keeping him around is gonna pay off. Cliff Floyd, freaking amazing year. Helps when you’re not injured all the time. Cameron was flying high before getting hurt. Victor Diaz is gonna be a star but he’s still just 21 and need some experience. David Wright – holy crap, where did he come from? Suddenly he’s one of the best hitters in the league batting .313. Pedro more than did his fair share.

So things for the Mets to do next year: 1. Trade Piazza. He’s right now a glorified DH who can’t throw anyone out at catcher so why not trade him to some AL team looking for a DH and a good team leader? 2. Permanently promote their young starters. Jae Seo has proved by now that he should be full time rotation. Dump Ishii and Zambrano. Pedro, Seo, even Benson when he’s on are the ones that pulled their weight this season. 3. Get rid of Braden Looper as soon as humanly possible and pick up a real closer.

So that just about does it for my season of baseball other than random comments on the playoffs and WS.

Mark Messier retired from the NHL. It really is the end of an era with all these big names retiring. Damphousse, Stevens, MacInnis and Francis all saying good bye to the game. But from a Rangers fan stand point Messier’s retirement really is huge. His playoff win guarantee during the Rangers ‘94 run to the club is legendary. He’ll be missed.

Rather hefty sports entry I’ve noticed. Sorry bout that.

New and notes:

Jack Johnson concert = awesome. He’s friggin’ amazing in concert. Probably because the whole acoustic thing comes across just as good live as on an album. But man, he played like 2/3’s of his catalogue including a 6 song encore. Props for doing his cover of Jimmy Buffet’s Pirate Looks at 40 and mega-props for the awesome transition of Gone to the White Stripes Doorbell and back again.

Emmy’s coming up this weekend. Go Scrubs! Go Lost! Die Will & Grace!

Family Guy was in rare form for its premiere (“Reagan smash!”)

Arrested Development: next Monday! I love the fact that the Fonz left the show so they’re replacing him with Chachi. Brilliant!

Looking forward to My Name is Earl. If only because Jason Lee is one of the funniest actors alive.

Episode V is done. Figuring out when I’m going to start the final one. Writing it would also help.

Until next time:

“I'll be in the hospital bar.”
”Um, you know there isn't a hospital bar, mother.”
”Well, this is why people hate hospitals.”