It's an illusion, Michael. A trick is something a whore does for money... or candy!

It's an Arrested Development quote. How would I know what a whore does for candy?

Sorry for the long period in between updates. The office has been getting a little crazy lately and with the moving coming up and the impending nuptials it’s been nuts trying to finish of the strip and write the blog. So here we go:

Go Irish. Let me preface this by saying I’m not dancing for joy as much as many other Irish fans seem to be as I do remember 3 years ago, Ty’s first year, when he went 8-0 to start the season including a win over a top-10 ranked Michigan. Luckily I do have faith in Charlie Weiss and know he’s not giving the Rockne comparisons a second thought. That being said, how freakin’ cool was that win over Michigan in the Big House? Sloppy second half but that first drive was the best thing I’ve seen the Irish do in years (yeah, maybe I’m exaggerating but it was pretty damn cool). So for now let’s just say I’m pretty impressed with the Charlie Weiss era this far.

Mets = done. Man, that was rough. They get a taste of the Wild Card and then bam! Lose 9 out of 10 to effectively put them out of the running. Well I’m still going to a game when they’re in town next week. While a disappointing finish, they far surpassed my expectations. Willie Randolph just became the best thing to happen to the franchise in the last decade. Things are looking good for next year though. Carlos Beltran is a solid foundation to build that team around. Yes, he’s overpaid but that’s not his fault. They gave him that money. Keeping him around is gonna pay off. Cliff Floyd, freaking amazing year. Helps when you’re not injured all the time. Cameron was flying high before getting hurt. Victor Diaz is gonna be a star but he’s still just 21 and need some experience. David Wright – holy crap, where did he come from? Suddenly he’s one of the best hitters in the league batting .313. Pedro more than did his fair share.

So things for the Mets to do next year: 1. Trade Piazza. He’s right now a glorified DH who can’t throw anyone out at catcher so why not trade him to some AL team looking for a DH and a good team leader? 2. Permanently promote their young starters. Jae Seo has proved by now that he should be full time rotation. Dump Ishii and Zambrano. Pedro, Seo, even Benson when he’s on are the ones that pulled their weight this season. 3. Get rid of Braden Looper as soon as humanly possible and pick up a real closer.

So that just about does it for my season of baseball other than random comments on the playoffs and WS.

Mark Messier retired from the NHL. It really is the end of an era with all these big names retiring. Damphousse, Stevens, MacInnis and Francis all saying good bye to the game. But from a Rangers fan stand point Messier’s retirement really is huge. His playoff win guarantee during the Rangers ‘94 run to the club is legendary. He’ll be missed.

Rather hefty sports entry I’ve noticed. Sorry bout that.

New and notes:

Jack Johnson concert = awesome. He’s friggin’ amazing in concert. Probably because the whole acoustic thing comes across just as good live as on an album. But man, he played like 2/3’s of his catalogue including a 6 song encore. Props for doing his cover of Jimmy Buffet’s Pirate Looks at 40 and mega-props for the awesome transition of Gone to the White Stripes Doorbell and back again.

Emmy’s coming up this weekend. Go Scrubs! Go Lost! Die Will & Grace!

Family Guy was in rare form for its premiere (“Reagan smash!”)

Arrested Development: next Monday! I love the fact that the Fonz left the show so they’re replacing him with Chachi. Brilliant!

Looking forward to My Name is Earl. If only because Jason Lee is one of the funniest actors alive.

Episode V is done. Figuring out when I’m going to start the final one. Writing it would also help.

Until next time:

“I'll be in the hospital bar.”
”Um, you know there isn't a hospital bar, mother.”
”Well, this is why people hate hospitals.”

You know, we're not the only ones destroying trees. What about beavers? You call yourself an environmentalist, why don't you go club a few beavers?

The answer is mustard. Mustard is made from mustard seeds.

Ok, so random obscure SNL Celebrity Jeopardy reference. Moving on…

After a lovely weekend up north during which Erin found out that it’s cold and windy on a mountain top no matter how warm a day it may be and I found out that every single one of my little cousins has no problem water skiing while I can’t do it to save my life, it’s back to the good ol’ workplace in D.C.

Woo hoo! Mets are now only a half game out of the wildcard. After this coming week we’ll pretty much know where they stand as it’s 3 series in a row again the Phillies, Marlins and Braves. That’s rough.

ND football vs. Pitt this Saturday! Still pissed they moved the DC alumni game watch out to Pentagon City. It was so nice being able to walk 5 minutes home and pass out on the couch. We’ll see how long this lasts. Especially cause the game on Saturday isn’t til 8 at night. Ouch.

So I have a few things I’m working on for the next couple entries but as I was thinking about the new TV season and how much I hate cliffhangers here’s a quick top 5 list for you:

TOP 5 BLEEPIN’ LAST SEASON CLIFFHANGERS I WANT ANSWERED:

5. How the bleep is Elliot going to be a major character on Scrubs now that she’s moved to a different hospital?

4. Who the bleep was that at the door on Veronica Mars?

3. How the bleep are those crazy kids on the O.C. getting out of the whole shooting Trey mess?

2. What is Luke gonna say to Lorelei’s proposal on Gilmore Girls and is Rory really bleepin’ dropping out?

1. What the bleep’ is in that bleepin’ hatch on Lost?

MUSIC YOU SHOULD BE LISTENING TO:

Death Cab For Cutie – Plans

So yeah, this just came out yesterday. I’ve already listened to it 3 times. I can’t even remember the last time I bought a CD the day it came out but after falling in love with this band from their Transatlanticism album and frontman Ben Gibbards lyrics and vocals on the Postal Service album, I was really looking forward to this. And it didn’t disappoint. It’s good. It’s really good. The opening track Marching in Manhattan is a great catchy number which sounds like it could’ve come right off Transatlanticism. Soul Meets Body is there first single which kicks things up a little bit. Summer Skin is classic Death Cab with the soulful piano and melancholy yet poetic lyrics. Different Names For The Same Thing sees a little Postal Service coming out in the album between the use of the synths and beat. I will Follow You Into The Dark is a totally acoustic guitar number with Gibbards voice jumping front and center with his depressing yet ultimately sweet lyrics. It reminds me a lot of Iron & Wine’s cover of Such Great Heights but with Gibbard singing his own song. I could keep going on but let’s just say Death Cab (or to be a total mark: DCFC) continues to impress me with they’re work and while I don’t know if this album surpasses Transatlanticism (nor should it have to) it definitely belongs up there in their catalogue. One thing is for sure, while this is their first album on a major label, the band isn’t changing their tone or “selling out” musically. Thank God for that.

News and Notes:

Saw the 2 hour premiere of Prison Break. Not too bad. Sure a whole lot of things happening dependent on pure luck but it’s TV. The show, if nothing else, is entertaining and as such it’s earned at least a couple more viewing.

Charlize Theron on Arrested Development this season? Dear God people why aren’t you watching this show?

Episode 5 getting a lot of love this week.

I really want to see the Constant Gardener. Ralph Fiennes and Rachel Weisz in a movie by the guy who did City of God? Sweet.

Awesome new Harry Potter trailer here (trailer 2 in the trailer section). The music alone in this has me hugely excited to see it.

Until next time:

“Don't you always say "family first"?”

“Yes, but that is not a family. It's a bunch of greedy, selfish people who have our nose. And Aunt Lindsay”

“She's not really my aunt?”

“No, it's not a real nose. I have a picture of her when she was 14 in a bathing cap and she looks like a falcon.”

When I held that gun in my hand, I felt a surge of power ... like God must feel when he's holding a gun.

Irony: I actually don’t like mustard. Think about it.

Props to Tom for a great time this weekend even if I did actually end up watching Guess Who and did actually end up laughing at it. Even Ashton Kutcher isn’t enough to stop Bernie Mac from being funny as hell.

Ok, so strange double post today. I actually wrote the below post last week but then realized that very few of the 3 or 4 people who read this blog would actually care. So I figured I’d save it and just post another more general entry along with it this week. But should you care to read it I have one additional entry: the game Metroid Hunters for the Nintendo DS which was also supposed to be a HUGE launch for that system this fall/holiday season has also been delayed til 2006. Ouch.

Ok, no more video game stuff.

The Mets are rockin’ the suburbs these days having won 8 of 10 (including a CRUSHING of Arizona two nights in a row) and are now only 1.5 games out of the wildcard. Granted that puts them in with 4 other teams trying to win it but still, no one would have seen them at this point at the beginning of the season. Can’t wait to hit another game when they come into town at the end of September.

The Rangers have still yet to do anything big in the free agent market. Yeah, the signed Steve Rucchin which isn't a bad deal but they need some new blood. They don't need another superstar just a couple more solid players. At this rate the only team who will have done less will be the Washington Capitals. Good lord, nothing there. I’ll just have to make sure to go pick the Caps games I go to based on their opponent.

If you’re not watching Entourage, wow, you’re missing out. Caught a 4 episode marathon last week and then went back and watched every other episode this season (yay HBO on demand!). The show is hysterical and has jumped up to my new favorite show (yes, it’s summer where there’s not a whole lot of competition but still). I mean any show with the line: “Dude, did you just get cock-blocked by Bob Sagat?” is a show that has to be genius.

Two weeks til Fox premiere week. Prison Break, while seriously annoying the crap out of me with the commercials running every 5 minutes on Fox, is getting some really good buzz so I’m looking forward to checking it out. The Simpsons is premiering normally on the 11^th! No word yet on whether it’ll be the Treehouse of Horror kicking it off as usual or if they’ll have a normal episode and save that one for Halloween. O.C. is also returning and yeah, I’m now just a full on convert. It’s just too damn funny and I feel no guilt anymore over watching it. Speaking of the O.C….

Music You Should Be Listening To:

Music from the O.C. Volume 1 and 4:

Yeah, I know the 1 and 4 are random but I have half the songs on the 2^nd album (not that I wouldn’t recommend it, I just already have the Killers, Death Cab, the Thrills and Keane) and the 3^rd album is the Chrismakuh one which it’s just not the holiday season quite yet. But I recommend these albums for anyone who liked the Garden State or Scrubs soundtracks. Just great music on here you normally won’t here on the radio.

Volume One is little more straight forward. The Way We Get By by Spoon has a little bit of a funky early Ben Folds feel to it. We Used to Be Friends by the Dandy Warhols is actually theme song for Veronica Mars and is just really catchy. The beautifully acoustic Orange Sky was actually in the movie Garden State but was left off that soundtrack because it was already on this one. And of course the O.C. theme song California by Phantom Planet is the easiest song in the world to get stuck in your head.

Volume Four gets a little more eclectic starting off Decent Days and Nights by the Futureheads which has a Clash-esque feel to it. Goodnight and Go by Imogen Heap will remind you of Let Go by Frou Frou especially because Imogen Heap is in fact one half of Frou Frou. To Be Alone With You by Sufjan Stevens has a nice acoustic Iron & Wine sound. Things then ratchet up a notch with Scarecrow and The View off the latest Beck and Modest Mouse albums. Finally the album end on a great cover of Champagne Supernova by matt pond PA.

News and Notes:

We’ve hit the 2 month mark. Wow, October will be here before you know it. Then Greece!

Heading back up to NY this weekend and finally will have a little time at the lake. It’s been way too long.

ND football! One week!

Weekly shameless strip plug!

Until next time:

“This is where you should be living, Vince. In a kingdom, like a prince.”

“Don't you mean in a kingdom like a king, you idiot?”

“Nah, E. Everyone wants to kill the king. But the prince, he just sails along telling all the ladies, "One day I'm gonna be king."

Look, the thing about my family is there's five of us. Marge, Bart, Girl Bart, the one who doesn't talk, and the fat guy. How I loathe him!

And we’re back with another edition of that crazy, sexy, cool blog, the Mustard.

It’s rant time:

So Nintendo has officially screwed themselves. The announced today that the new Zelda game for the Gamecube which was supposed to be out in November for the Christmas season has been pushed back til at least the 2^nd quarter of ’06. This delay was necessary to make improvements to the game. Now while I’m all for high quality games and Zelda has never let me down before, this is next to death for Nintendo. Right now they don’t have a major holiday release to put out. Zelda was HUGE. Especially a realistic one which looked more in line with the Ocarina of Time of N64 (which was one of, if not the best game of all time) rather than the cartoony Wind Waker for Gamecube (which was still a good game but the cell shaded look turned a lot of people off). This Zelda game by itself could have held off the ridiculous onslaught that is going to be the release of the Xbox360. I’m not saying it would’ve stopped the success of the new Xbox. But it could have plugged a major leak in the Nintendo ship as people who are more than disappointed with the Gamecube jump onto the Xbox bandwagon. And I’m sure PS2 is gonna have some big games out in time for the holidays.

Nintendo has nothing left. Zelda was it. It was they’re last big hurrah before the new system comes out next year. As of now it, it may end up that this new Zelda game doesn’t come out until after both the Xbox360 and PS3 come out.

Nintendo has to get their arrogant heads out of their asses. They’re not infallible anymore. This isn’t the Nintendo of the SNES and early N64 age. They don’t have the market lead anymore. And all those loyal Nintendo fans are getting to their wits end, myself included. They’re sick and tired of sticking with a company who seems to believe that their users will never leave no matter how many times Nintendo drops the ball. They’re sick of seeing amazing games like Halo and Ninja Gaiden and God of War and Final Fantasy come out on other systems and having to settle for Mario Party 67 and a Mario title in every sport. We didn’t even get a real Mario game except for the early Mario Sunshine release which no one bought!!!

Zelda was going the only real thing we Nintendo fans could get really excited for especially considering how stingy the company has been about revealing details of the new system. We don’t know anything about why it’s going to be a “Revolution”. We do know that it won’t play HD DVD’s because Nintendo doesn’t think we want them. The same way they thought we wouldn’t want the Gamecube to play regular DVDs. The same way they thought we wouldn’t want the Gamecube to allow for online play (ironically now Nintendo is hailing the wi-fi capabilities that are going to included in the Revolution console and acting like online play was their idea to begin with). Nintendo just keeps saying oh, it’s going to be huge but right now we can’t tell you anything about it. That only works for so long before people get tired of waiting and instead look at the ridiculously cool looking games coming out for the other new consoles.

So it’s a little hard for a Nintendo fan to get excited for a new Zelda release when by that time all focus is going to be on the next generation consoles. What Nintendo should have done was develop this game for the new Revolution console and have it launch with that. That would’ve been amazing. Every Nintendo fan in the world would have waited for that. A new console AND a new Zelda game? Sign me up. But instead we’re going to be getting a Zelda game on an old system (albeit probably a great Zelda game) while everyone is oohing and awwing about the new Xbox and Playstation.

Right now Nintendo is a bad bad position and unless they’re going to pull out the Holy Grail with their new gaming system and blow everyone out of the water, we could be singing goodbye by the time the next generation consoles reach the end of their lives.

Ok, sorry. Ridiculously long rant there. To the new and notes:

Strip back and running. I’m trying to get those updates out as quick as possible to make up for my time off.

Looking forward to moving next month. The new place is looking very cool. I mean it has a view of the National Mall from the new gym built on the roof of the 20 story building. Right next to the rooftop pool. Sweeeeeeet.

Little over 2 weeks until Irish Football starts up. Damn DC alumni club moved the game watch. It was really nice having it like 4 blocks from my apartment. Now I’ll have to take the metro while being slightly inebriated. Let’s see if Charlie Weiss is the answer to all ND alumni prayers.

Anyone else think Terrell Owens just needs to have his legs broken? God, the whining never stops. You signed the damned contract!!!! Deal with it!!! I’m sure you’re family will be able to feed itself with the $7 million dollars you’re making this season. Somehow I manage to not go hungry. I’m confident in your ability to provide. Wanker.

Until next time:

"Lisa, would you like a donut?"
"No thanks. Do you have any fruit?"
"This has purple in it. Purple's a fruit."

It's so damn hot! Milk was a bad choice.

Wow, I remember this blog. Mustard something, right? Alright, so I took a little time off from both the blog and strip. I needed a little down time. Plus I wasn’t around for most of it thereby not allowing me any updates.

First off: Shout out to the L.A. boys (and Crowley) for making my bachelor weekend freakin’ terrific. You guys are awesome and despite the fact that I’ve been in detox for two weeks now, it was an incredible time that won’t soon be forgotten…. mostly cause Crowley posted up all the quotes on his blog. Read at your own peril. Or the peril of those who actually said the quotes. Snow’s been to L.A.!

Uber-quick trip up to Saratoga last weekend was also a fine time. I actually won money at the track! Go me! Granted the winnings were just enough to cover the tolls on the way home but positive gains are what really matter.

I’ll give this to the NHL: they’re making the pre-season pretty darn interesting. With the free-agent craze going on now there isn’t going to be one team that looks the same come October. As far as the Rangers go: will you do something already! I mean come on! Jagr isn’t someone who’s going to last forever. He’s already stated this might be his last year (yeah, it’s not going to be but still). They need to bring in someone to build a team around. I mean the Blackhawks at least went out and go Khabibulin and that’s the friggin’ Blackhawks!

Mets are only 3 games out of the wildcard right now. Not to shabby. Too bad the Nats are in a freefall. I mean they’ve lost 12 games by one run since the All-Star break. Where’s the clutch play?

Music You Should Be Listening To:

Ben Folds – Songs for Silverman

A little more laid back than his last album, Rockin’ The Suburbs (which criminally only had the title track as a single, the album was amazing.), Folds’ piano takes center stage even more so here. I don’t have a problem with that at all. Landed has an early Billy Joel-esque sound to it though the lyrics are total Ben Folds. Gracie is a beautifully sweet lullabye to his daughter. The emotional Late is Ben Folds goodbye to Elliot Smith and is absolutely heartbreaking to listen to. Honestly, I’m loving Ben Folds solo efforts more than his earlier group work.

Dispatch – Bang Bang

Like a combination of the simple yet catchy hooks of Guster and the ska beat of Sublime, this album is a little more focused in its sound than Silent Steeples. Bats in the Belfry is a catchy, high tempo number that’ll stick with you. The General has always been a favorite of mine, very simple number that’s just infinitely catchy. Two Coins is another standout number that’s completely acoustic, relying on the strength of the vocals to carry the song. It's really a shame this group didn't keep together as they had a whole lot of potential, at least a helluva lot more than the schlock you normally find on the radio these days.

New and Notes:

Booter hooked on Serenity. It was only a matter of time.

Scrubs Season 2: November 15^th. Sweet.

One month til the fall schedule starts up. The Simpsons is actually starting before November this year!!!

Until next time:

"What in the hell’s diversity?"

"Well, I could be wrong, but I believe diversity is an old wooden ship that was used during the civil war era."

Show me the way to go home! Everybody! I'm tired and I want to go to bed! Just the women!

L.A. here I come! My flight leaves in a few a hours and holy sweet moly do I need this extended weekend. My brain feels like it’s about to spontaneously combust. And that would hurt.

The NHL is officially back and the schedule has been released for the year. I love how they’re making such a big deal over all 30 teams playing on opening day. Well yeah, they have had a 15 month rest. I think they’ll be good to go opening day. Personally I’m still a little pissed at them. Yeah, I’m gonna be going to the games because it’s hockey and I love the sport. But those ticket prices better be drastically reduced (i.e. next to free) or those stands are going to be really empty. The Rangers come into town to play the Caps on Monday afternoon on Columbus Day. Boo ya. Shame the Sharks aren’t playing here this year, but I’ll be happy with a couple Rangers games.

Quick reviews:

Happy Endings – The latest by Don Roos (Opposite of Sex) is one of those movies I love going to every now and then. It’s a movie that makes you think as opposed to most summer flicks in which thinking usually hurts the movie. The cast is excellent and everyone is giving strong performances but the most surprising standout is Tom Arnold. Now go back and re-read that sentence. Wow. But honestly, he puts in a great performance as widower who is just trying to be a good father while trying to find something to grasp onto in life. His reaction when he finds out that his son (who he has been worried is gay) has a girlfriend is just superb. The thing is that he’s terrified that his son is gay but not because he’s this raging homophobe but rather that he has absolutely no idea how to handle it, he's not sure if he's supposed to act differently. He just have never had to deal with anything like that. Of course he then goes on to develop a relationship with said girlfriend (Maggie Gyllenhaal) who is really just a golddigger looking to score. Steven Coogan also gives a strong performance as part of a gay couple who begin to suspect that a lesbian couple with whom they’re best friends has been lying to them as to the whether one of them is the father of the lesbians’ child. Intersperse this with Coogan’s step-sister, Lisa Kudrow who is being blackmailed into helping an aspiring film maker make his film school entry movie in exchange for the location of the son she gave up for adoption (whom she had with Coogan, in a whole, freaky, ending of Clueless moment) and basically you come up with a movie that sounds so unbelievably out there but ends up making sense and being a solid movie to boot. Yeah, I realize halfway through this review that I just could not even come close to a complete review of this movie without a 20 page long essay diving into the themes and cross-cutting storylines. Suffice to say that if you’re looking for something other than the usual summerfare, check out this movie. By the way Maggie Gyllenhaal does all her own singing in the movie and she’s ridiculously good.

Music you should be listening to:

Coldplay – X & Y

Yes, I do think that Coldplay is often overhyped. But this is a solid album, particularly the 2^nd half. Yes, I do get annoyed (as I’m sure Coldplay does) that they’re constantly being referred to as the next U2. There are some similiarities and several of the songs on here showcase Edge-esque guitar riffs (particularly on White Shadows and Talk). But Coldplay is their own band and I think it’s unfair to judge an artist solely by comparison to another. Plus the fact that when I heard this album referred to as Coldplay’s Joshua Tree I really wanted to hit the reviewer. It’s good, but come on, Joshua Tree is one of the best albums of the past 25 years. Ok, anyways, Chris Martin’s vocals continue to be the front and center act here which he’s got a good set of pipes on him, so I’m not complaining. Speed of Sound is the big single but also try Swallowed by the Sea with its simple, yet effective worldplay and A Message with its low key acoustic guitar and Fix You which is the Scientist of this album.

Old 97’s – Too Far to Care

With more of a country slant to it than their poppier Fight Songs, this album probably won’t appeal to everyone but if you can appreciate the Alternative/Americana fusion beat, you’ll find some good tunes for hanging around to. Rhett Miller just has a great ability to write fun, catchy lyrics and you’ll find some great examples on that with Timebomb, Melt Show and Big Brown Eyes.

Alright, until next time:

“Everybody I've got bad news. We've been cancelled.”

”Oh no Peter! How could they do that?”

”Well unfortuantely Lois, there's just no more room on the schedule. We just gotta accept the fact that FOX has to make room for terrific shows like Dark Angel, Titus, Undeclared, Action, That 80's Show, Wonder Falls, Fast Lane, Andy Richter Controls The Universe, Skin, Girl's Club, Cracking Up, The Pitts, Firefly, Get Real, Freaky Links, Wanda At Large, Costello, The Lone Gunman, A Minute with Stan Hooper, Normal Ohio, Pasadena, Harsh Realm, Keen Eddy, The Street, American Embassy, Cedric The Entertainer, The Tick, Louie, and Greg The Bunny.”

”Is there no hope?”

”Well I suppose if ALL those shows go down the tubes we might have a shot.”

And remember, every time you support a canceled Fox show, somewhere a network executive loses his wings.

Hola cabrones, and welcome back to another edition o' the Mustard.

The above quote is attribute to an excellent article on the show Firefly which I've raved about before in the blog. Sci-Fi is showing the whole series IN PROPER ORDER starting this Friday. I highly recommend you check it out (just TiVo if you need to go out. It'll be good hangover watching Saturday morning). For the rest of the article click here.

We’re officially into the crazy part of summer. Speaking of crazy, heading out to L.A. next weekend. And my God have mercy on my soul.

So I’ll just right into it cause I have a bunch of things I want to get to.

Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince:

Last Friday at 12:45, I walked into Barnes and Noble and picked up Harry Potter. I woke up at 10:30 the next morning and started reading. I finished up at about 9:00 that night. That’s a whole lotta reading. So to start off with, the book is the high quality, completely engrossing tale I’ve come to expect from J.K. Rowling. It is so easy to completely lose yourself in the world of Harry. But even while maintaining that sense of whimsy, Rowling is still playing hardball. She’s not pulling and punches and I mean that literally cause by the end of the book you feel like you just got punched in the gut. It’s easily the harshest ending of any of the books and she continues to show that Joss Whedon-like ability to kill off anybody. I’m not complaining because I’m completely and utterly intrigued as to where she’s going from here. I mean at this point everything is up for grabs. While it frees her up to do whatever she wants with this last book, it leaves the reader hating the fact that they have to wait at least another 2 years before the final book comes out. Oh and for those wondering, Harry’s not a total whiney little pissant this year! Yay! His character in the 5^th book just made me want to hurt him. Damn angst-ridden teenagers. So get ready folks cause this series is winding down and I don’t think anyone knows where it’s gonna end up. Thank God for that.

I’m invisio-texting a few thoughts of mine as to HUGE SPOILER material but I want to mention. So only highlight the below if you’ve already read the book.

Ok, RAB I’m convinced is Regulus Black, Sirius’ brother who was murdered by Voldemort after trying to leave the deatheaters. It makes sense and I think is a great idea on Rowling’s part.

I don’t think we know all there is to know about Snape and his murder of Dumbledore. I don’t care how weak he was, Dumbledore could’ve taken the Deatheaters. Especially as at first it was only Malfoy. You’re telling me between Dumbledore and Harry they couldn’t have taken 4 Deatheaters blindly walking through a door? Also I refuse to believe that Snape’s betrayal is that simple. He just fooled Dumbledore for 15 years? That’s it? Come on! Dumbledore may want to believe in the good of people but he’s not an idiot. He saw through Tom Riddle during his rise to power and there’s no way he would’ve just been simply taken in by Snape. Plus Rowling doesn’t write things that simple. She wrote the 2^nd Chapter of the book showing Snape explaining everything to the Deatheaters and you’re telling me that that’s it? She showed us Snape’s evil right away and it just is that simple? Rowling’s a better writer than that and that’s why I’m so excited for the last book. That’s when we’ll find out the whole truth.

END SPOILER

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory:

Finally! Charlie’s a good kid who doesn’t screw up! Thank you! That’s the main reason I don’t like the Gene Wilder version as much as everyone else. I hate that Charlie ends up being just as bad as the rest of them. “Oh, but he apologized!” Well, yeah, cause he got a chance to! How do you know Violet wouldn’t have said she was sorry if she ever got a chance to see Wonka after being de-juiced or Agustus might have repented his ways if he hadn’t been sucked up a pipe into the fudge room. So don’t give me that crap that Charlie was sorry. He was just as irresponsible as the others. Ok, sorry, that’s just bugged the hell out of me for a long time. So this version: fantastical. Freddy Highmore is so unbelievably perfect as Charlie, Tim Burton should get down on his knees and thank whatever higher power he believes in for his casting in Finding Neverland opposite Johnny Depp. Charlie’s grandparents have much better personalities in this version which are played for some great laughs. David Kelly as Grandpa Joe in particular is perfect. He looks older and more decrepit than the previous Grandpa Joe but he has that whimsical gleam in his eye that’s found in the books. The other children are also done well. The updating of Mike Teevee from TV western obsessed to video game/technology obsessed I think was necessary as cowboys aren’t quite so in today. And yes Johnny Depp as Wonka. While I don’t like the older movie, I did enjoy Gene Wilder’s performance (up until he goes postal on Charlie which was just so far out of Wonka’s character it still makes me cringe). Depp goes in an entirely different direction and yet it’s still a great performance. And while I hate to mention this because so much has been made of it already, he is not bloody channeling Michael eff-ing Jackson in this movie! Christ, can’t these critics leave current pop-culture out of their reviews for once!!! Ok, yes, he speaks in a strange voice. So does Kermit the Frog. “Well, he invites children to come into his playground factory”. Yeah, he does, but he doesn’t want to. Here’s the thing: Depp’s Wonka doesn’t like children. Hell, he doesn’t like people in general. When Violet introduces herself, Wonka responds “I don’t care.” He’s bringing in kids so that he can find someone to take over for himself when he’s gone. But he’s not happy about getting older. He’s not happy about being forced into human contact again. He’s socially inept as is seen when he doesn’t know how to continue a conversation so he takes some notecards and starts reading from them. His transformation from social recluse to accepting people back into his life is one of the best parts of the movie. So just accept the fact that this is Depp's own creation and move on, will you? Anyways, the Oompa Loompas are great. They’re all played by the actor Deep Roy and they’re just freaky, exactly as they should be. Love the songs this time. No oompa-loompa-gobbidy-goo. These songs are straight from the book. Danny Elfman is having fun here with his music. He hasn’t done this quality of work since Nightmare Before Christmas. The only qualm about the movie is the ending is changed (actually really just extended) a little in order to bring closure to Wonka’s childhood subplot involving his dentist father (played by Christopher Lee who is seriously having the best time of his career these days). I personally didn’t have a problem with it but I know some people will say, oh no, deviation from the book! All in all, I much prefer this version and I thank Tim Burton for giving a great book a truly faithful adaptation.

Ok, I also need to review the new Don Roos movie, Happy Endings but I’ll save that til next time as this has gone on long enough.

Until next time:

"Hey, is the Count a vampire?"
"What's that?"
"Well, he's got these big fangs. Have they, have they ever shown him doin' somebody in and then feedin' on 'em?"
"You're... you're asking me if they've ever done a Sesame Street in which the Count kills somebody and then sucks their blood for sustenance."
"Yeah."
"No. They've never done that."

I'M ON A RAMPAGE

And they call it the Mustard.

Welcome back seniors y senioritas to my blog which I thought was cool but now Booter’s off and started up another. 2 blogs, man? Where do you get all this time from? Says the man who wastes countless hour on a web strip. Speaking of which…

EPISODE V is up and running! Yay! See that wasn’t too long and I know it was rough but it was worth it.

So we’ve reach the mid season and the Mets aren’t statistically eliminated yet. Rock on! I’m a little lower on Nationals fever ever since a Nats fans at the game again the Mets last week flipped me off and told me to go do something anatomically impossible just because I was wearing a Mets hat. But he looked like an intelligent and socially viable human being so I’m sure he’ll turn out with a great life and very few STDs.

So the Emmy Noms came out. Normally this would be the part where I’d go off about Will & Grace getting a nomination over Scrubs except this year: SCRUBS GETS NOMINATED!!!!!! Boo ya! Zach Braff also picked up a nod for comedy actor. Holy crap, it’s like I died and went to heaven but God decided it wasn’t my time yet and instead gave the academy a brain. Garden State probably helped a lot towards those.

Will & Grace: IT’S NOT FUNNY PEOPLE! STOP NOMINATING IT! YOU’RE ONLY ENCOURAGING THEM MORE! 15 BLEEP-ING NOMINATIONS!?!? I FEEL LIKE I’M TAKING CRAZY PILLS HERE!!!

Let’s break the main categories down quick:

Best Drama: Deadwood – awesome

Lost – easily should win.

24 – OK, I like the show but let’s face it, it’s not exactly high concept drama. I mean I like Michael Bay and John Woo action flicks but I wouldn’t nominate them for an Oscar.

The West Wing – why? I don’t pretend to watch the show but I thought this had just been steadily going down hill for year? Let me guess, this is the typical academy repeat vote where if it’s been in the category before, it has to stay until the show goes off the air no matter the quality of the show *cough* Frasier *cough* Will & Grace *cough*

Six Feet Under – Haven’t watched since season one.

Drama Actor – Hank Azaria – didn’t watch

Hugh Laurie – only caught a couple episodes. He amused me but the show didn’t

Ian McShane – Please please please let him win. This is guy who is such an evil SOB but he does it so well you love him. The foulest mouth imaginable and just damn hilarious.

Jame Spader – re…..peat

Keifer Sutherland – deja…..vu

Drama Actress - I’ll cut to the chase here, I really didn’t watch any off these show but I like Mariska Hargitay from past years and she’ll probably win so hurrah.

Drama Sup. Actor – Naveen Andrews and Terry O’Quinn from Lost both deserve it. Hell, both supporting categories should have been all Lost cast. Locke rules, give it to him!

Drama Sup. Actress – Again, no shows I watch. Sandra Oh? My how Sideways has helped her.

Best Comedy: Arrested Development – hey, maybe they’ll now keep it a 4^th year!

Desperate Housewives – I don’t watch, a lot of people do. Probably will win unless…

Everybody Loves Raymond – Last season often generates the farewell win. But I didn’t work last year for Frasier so no guarantee this year

Scrubs – It has no chance of winning but damn, it’s about eff-ing time it got recognized!

Will & Grace – oh just die already!

Actor Comedy: Jason Bateman – the best comedic foil around

Zach Braff – “I miss you so much it hurts sometimes.” Oh man, he’ll never win but this has to be sweet for him.

Eric McCormick – a parody of his original character

Ray Romano – Farewell vote…

Tony Shaloub – So happy I discovered Monk. “I have this terrible fear of the womb.”

Actress Comedy – All Desperate Housewives with the noticeable exception of Eva Longeria. Interesting. Patrica Heaton - Farewell… Jane Kaczmarek – Repeat nom (though Malcolm was a whole lot funnier this year than in the past).

Sup. Actor Comedy – Peter Boyle and Brad Garrett – so long, farewell, etc. Sean Hayes – a parody of a human being. Jeremy Piven – heard good things and he’s a great actor. Jeffrey Tambor – easily easily should win. But won’t. Damn academy.

Sup. Actress Comedy – Two and a Half Men? The hell? Megan Mullally – Fran Drescher is less annoying. Doris Roberts – did Raymond miss anybody? Jessica Walter – Fantastic in Arrested Development

Also a funny thing I saw: Scrubs is nominated for Multi-Camera Picture Editing for the episode “My Life in Four Cameras”. That episode was the Scrubs send up of the traditional way a sitcom is shot. Amazingly that even by mocking, they still do it better then most normal sitcoms.

Alright, that’s my quick Emmy input.

News and notes:

Shout out to Booter for the visit yesterday.

Shout out to Crowley cause it’s Crowley and we miss him.

The NHL season is back on. Now to find out how many people still care…

Bobby Abreau hits lots of homeruns and the HR Derby, while sucking in the new “international” format, is still fun to watch.

Until next time:

Ha! I got your hat! Take that, hatless! Now go back to the quad and resume your hackey sac tourney! I'm not gonna lay down for some frat boy bastard with his damn Teva sandals and his Skoal Bandits and his Abercrombie and Fitch long sleeved, open stitched, crew neck Henley smoking his sticky buds out of a soda can while watching his favorite downloaded Simpsons episodes every night! Yes, we all love "Mr. Plow"! Oh, you've got the song memorized, do you? SO DOES EVERYONE ELSE! That is exactly the kind of idiot you see at Taco Bell at 1 in the morning! The guy who just whiffed his way down the bar skank ladder!

A birthday is just the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun. Enjoy the trip.

Na na na na na na na na, Mustard! Na na na na na na na na, Mustard! Mustard! Mustard! Mustard!

That was to the theme of Batman, if you didn’t get it.

So another year in the life of Mr. Snow has come and gone. I know for the most part I tend to rant and rave in this blog but I’m not all full of anger and contempt. So in honor of my birthday, I’m doing a 180 and presenting you with:

Things I’m Grateful For in the Past Year:

(in no particular order)

My Family, each and every semi-dysfunctional one of them

Jackasses in California and Wankers in Georgia

The Simpsons, still crazy after all these years

The Family Guy being back on TV

Jeff, that wiggle that just sleeps too doggone much

Scrubs being the funniest show on TV and still going

Scrubs on DVD!

A Star Wars movie that doesn’t suck

A Batman movie that doesn’t suck

A Van Helsing movie that sucked but I had had a few beers before which made it funnier than it was probably supposed to be

Discovering new music that is innovative and fun and actually good

Beer

Hating Booter for being all the way over at the band building and why the hell can’t he just meet us at the library? What the hell is wrong him? Why is he such an ass?

“I have to tie my shoe. You guys go on up ahead.”

“Yes.”

Get Fuzzy

Having 12 hours worth of Lord of the Rings Extended Editions on DVD

Crowley’s obsession with siege engines.

Crowley getting me hooked on Firefly.

Me getting Crowley hooked on Justice League Unlimited, Star Wars: KOTOR I and II, and Batman comics.

Being up on Crowley 3 to 1.

Pointless competition.

Now officially owning every episode of Buffy and Angel.

Bittorrent.

Coronas and chips at Mexicali blues.

New carpet.

People taking their shoes off before walking on new carpet.

Cartoon Network’s Adult Swim.

Margarita’s in 20 oz Coke bottles.

Long days by the pool.

Sunburns.

Baseball in DC.

Baseball in Atlanta.

The Mets maybe kinda almost not sucking…?

People actually reading my dumbass strip that I just started making one night when I was bored.

Peanuts, peanut butter, cats, milk, chocolate, and other things that can kill Booter.

Friends with good senses of humor.

Acceptance of male pattern baldness with grace and nobility.

Booter and Ashley’s happy new year.

Pictures of Booter and Ashley’s happy new year.

Booter’s New Year outfit.

Pictionary.

Give me my hair back! Why God why???

Strongbad.

Power hours and CD’s made for them.

A new car!

A 95 year old Great Grandmother who emails every week and is into Harry Potter.

Crowley finally posting all his collected quotes to a blog.

Wednesday nights.

Brock’s reach around on Gilmore Girls

Michel’s reach around on Brock

Erin’s first keg stand.

Erin’s last keg stand.

Did I mention it was a keg of Yuengling?

Mmmmmmm…. Yuengling.

Douglas Adams books.

Café Asia takeout.

Owning an iPod.

Not joining the "iPod nation".

Hey remember that time I got Bruce Campbell’s autograph and had birthday cake with him?

Beers on the balcony.

Concert buses and the beer provided on them and the shelter they provide from torrential downpours.

And finally a wonderful fiancée who makes me happy each and every day.

Ok, that’s not a complete list but I figure it’s enough for now, no?

Until next time:

“Boo-yah! Welcome to Kuzcotopia, my ultimate summer getaway! Complete with waterslide!”

“What?”

“Isn't it great? It's my birthday gift to me! I'm so happy!”

No, uh, he's not even behind the box, he's barely obscured by the box.

You know it…you love it… you sometimes even read it… the Mustard!

The AFI just came out with their list of top 100 movie quotes. This list is open to debate but I can’t fault most of the choices one way or another with one notable exception: “Love means never having to say you're sorry” is #13? That’s the 13 best movie quote ever? It beats out “Rosebud”? It beats out “You’re gonna need a bigger boat”? It beats out “They call me Mr. Tibbs”, “Bond, James Bond”, “We’ll always have Paris”, “Round up the Usual Suspects”???? What the hell are these people on? Nevermind that the quote is one of the dumbest and most asinine things anyone could ever possibly say but for god’s sake, #13? Is Ryan O'Neal finding time in his unemployment to be on the AFI selection committee? Cause holy hell I can’t find any other reason for that getting there.

So remember how I was saying the Mets aren’t sucking? Nevermind.

Way to go NHL Players Association! After refusing to accept a salary cap and having the entire hockey season canceled, what did you do? You accepted a friggin’ cap! Why couldn’t you have caved in about a year ago and not ruined the future of the sport?! Brilliant job, jackasses.

Holy crap, if I hear one more of these stupid goofy cutsie celebrity couple names, I’m going to lose it. Bennifer, Brangelina, TomKat…. the people who come up with this crap need to be mauled by rabid cougar.

Ok, lot of hostility going on there. I’m better now.

Moving on I present to you, #4 of my Top 5 Most Anticipate Movies of the Summer:

BATMAN BEGINS

Holy sweet jefe, was this a great movie! This started out as possibly the lowest of my 5, but damn, it’s since shot straight to the top! Honestly, this is the best movie I’ve seen this year, period. Yeah, I know, not a whole lotta Oscar worthy pictures have come along so far, but still, this was phenomenal. Any worries I had going in were proved completely needless. I loved, loved, loved the buildup this movie had. You don’t even see Batman til halfway through and I didn’t care at all! The slow burn was great up to the sweet payoff. I also love the way they portrayed Batman. I was scared to death that Batman was gonna show up and start showing off Matrix-like kung-fu fights. Not a chance. He moves through the shadows stalking his criminals, scaring the crap out of them until suddenly jumping out and beating them senseless. You’re actually seeing the action from the point of the view of the criminals as Batman takes them down, confused, shaking and unfocused. They’ve finally got Batman right in this film. He’s not the campy, colorful, joking putz that Schumacher turned him into the past two films. He doesn’t dress like a bat to show up at charity auctions with an eff-ing Mastercard! He dresses like a bat to scare the living piss out of criminals! Which is what this movie shows. Hell, this movie is a scary movie in and of itself. Little kids would be balling their eyes out at some parts of it. I love it! Please God let them keep this up through the sequels. Everything about Batman’s arsenal and tactics are explained here unlike the other movies, and they all make sense which is amazing considering the stuff he does. Christian Bale plays a perfect Bruce Wayne, the cocky rich playboy in public. But as Batman, he’s even better. The scene where he’s interrogating a crooked cop who he has hanging upside down over the side of a building suspended from a rope, is one of my favorites in the movie. Everyone in this movie does a great job. Cillian Murphy as Dr. Crane/Scarecrow is phenomenally creepy. Gary Oldman as Sgt. Gordon… finally we have a Gordon who isn’t some lazy ass who sits around waiting for Batman to solve all his problems! He’s an active policeman, one of the few honest ones in the city, and it’s about damn time he was shown that way. Michael Caine as Alfred is exactly as he should be, supporting Bruce but conflicted by it. Liam Neeson is so much more than I was expecting in the movie. He’s such a good actor and he’s fantastic here. Ditto Morgan Freeman as Lucius Fox who had a bigger role than I expected and I’m damn happy about it. Hell, even Katie Holmes, who I was sure would stick out like a sore thumb, does a good job. While I would probably still have preferred to have the Harvey Dent character in this role, she plays her character exactly as needed, the steady, level-headed foil to Batman’s emotional, action-oriented mindset. The only minor quibble I may have with this movie is Ken Watanabe. He’s only in the movie for like 5 minutes! It’s nothing more than a brief cameo rather than the major part I was expecting him to play. Ah well, still a great movie. The last scene could also be one of my favorites but since the reviews I’ve read have all been missing this, I’d like to point something out. ...... POSSIBLE SPOILER BUT NOT REALLY JUST DON'T READ IF YOU WANT TO BE COMPLETELY SURPRISED…… the Joker reference in the final scene, while possibly setting up the sequel, is actually a reference the Batman: Year One graphic novel by Frank Miller which ends very similarly (Great novel by the way, if you want to see where this movie really came from). Ok, so that’s enough, stop reading and go see this movie already!

News and Notes:

Currently writing the strip and will hopefully start Ep. 5 in the next week or so.

Meeting Bruce Campbell tonight!!! Mwa ha ha ha!

Back home for the bro’s graduation. God, I feel old.

George Romero made another “Dead” movie. I’m rather intrigued…

Alright you chowdah-heads, until next time:

“After all these years, are you still afraid of me?”

”Well, remember on Thanksgiving when I said your turkey was dry and you picked me up and shook me?”

”Well, then, don't say that.”

Dude, why eat medical supplies when you've got pudding and tater tots right here? It makes no sense!

Holy forgotten blog, Batman! The Mustard has come back?

Yeah, yeah, I know, it’s been freaking forever since I updated this thing. What can I say, I’m a busy man, doing busy things. The job has been murder lately and I’ve also wanted to get the strip out a little more often than I had been, so the blog got pushed back. But I’m back baby!

Speaking of the strip, Episode 4 is finished! Yay! Probably take a little time before the next one, seeing as how I haven’t really written it yet, but I’ll get something out soon.

Remembered Crowley’s birthday this year! Go me!

Holy crap, how crazy is the National East this year? Every team over .500! The Mets aren’t sucking! The Nats are in first frickin’ place!

I have a policy where I try to review every movie I see, regardless of what is it. So without further ado I give you my review of:

THE SISTERHOOD OF THE TRAVELING PANTS

Not only did I see this movie, I saw it on opening night. Wow. Yes it’s a chick flick. No, it’s not a crappy one. So here we go, the good: I was heartened by the fact that Alexis Bledel is in it as her performances on the Gilmore Girls and Sin City have been quite entertaining. The performances in general are quite good in this movie. The four leads play their characters well and seem to really be into it. The movie itself actually deals with the different issues these girls face quite well, without sinking too much into the usual chick flick clichés. I’ve never read the books and quite frankly I never will read the books, but I have a suspicion the movie succeeds in it’s themes due mostly to the books' writing. I’ve heard they made major changes to some of the stories but the movie comes off quite well in that I never got lost on plot points due to lack of familiarity with the source material. The not so good: With some of the plotlines I was actually surprised how relatively deep and realistic they went with them, and I hoped that they would stick with it. Unfortunately, they fell into the trap at the end of feeling the need to tie up every loose end. This hurts the movie greatly in that it suffers from Return of the King syndrome with way too many endings. ROTK at least earned it as it was a 3 part epic trilogy. In this movie it just comes off as a cop out, refusting to actually allow the movie to not end everything all nice and happy. Yes, I get that it’s a chick flick but I almost believed halfway through the movie that they might finish it off without trying to make me leave the theater feeling all fuzzy. Final verdict, this isn’t gonna be something guys gather around to drink beers and watch but as far as a date movie goes, you could do far far worse *cough* Prince and Me *cough*.

Opening tonight: Batman Begins. The positive buzz on this is making me so happy. Now if only it included a scene of Batman burning an effigy of Joel Schumacher, it just might be the greatest movie ever.

Music You Should Be Listening To:

The Thrills – So Much For The City

Great, low key, alt-rock with a slightly country twist, this Irish band puts together some good music. Check out One Horse Town for the album’s highlight.

Green Day – American Idiot

Green Day grew up and put out possibly the best album of last year. Good for them. Honestly, this is album is fantastic and while unabashedly a concept album with Green Day foregoing their typical 2 and half minute quick radio-friendly fare which may turn off some of their younger fans, this is the best thing Green Day has ever done by far. Who knew doing a very artsy album would actually improve Green Day’s sound?

News and notes:

June 22^nd, I get to meet Bruce Campbell. Giggity-giggity-giggity!

Booter officially has an agent. God speed little doodle!

Scrubs Season One DVD is amazing. The show is just brilliant people! Why aren't more people watching it? Damn you NBC!

Until next time:

“The key to my exercise program is this one simple truth: I hate my body.”

“What!?”

“Do you understand that the second you look in the mirror and you're happy with what you see, baby, you just lost the battle!”

“You should give speeches to teenage girls.”

I Miss You So Much It Hurts Somtimes

Holy Sweet Mother Mary Moses Mcgee, the Mustard is back!

Yeah, yeah, I know, haven’t updated in a while. Been a busy few weeks.

So the countdown begins as we are only one day away from the finale of Lost which, in my book, closes down this year’s television season. In good news, Arrested Development is coming back! In bad news, those a-holes at NBC have push Scrubs back to mid-season replacement. I’m not gonna go off on a rant. I’m just going to FREAKIN HATE NBC!!!! JOEY?!! YOU’RE BRINGING BACK THAT INANE, MINDLESS WRECK OF A SHOW BUT YOU CAN’T PUT SCRUBS ON YOUR NORMAL SCHEDULE?!!!! DAMN YOU NBC!!!!!

I’m better now.

And now the moment you’ve all been waiting for:

REVIEW OF STAR WARS: EPISODE III - REVENGE OF THE SITH

The fact that this movie blows away the previous two installments is somewhat diminished by the mediocrity of those movies. Don’t get me wrong, I liked both of them in their own ways. The Darth Maul/Qui-Gon/Obi-Wan fight was badass. And everyone loved finally seeing Yoda kick ass. But the first one suffered from being way too “kiddy” and the second suffered from some of the most stilted love dialogue ever conceived by the human brain. Oh yeah, and Jar Jar Eff-ing Binks (by the way, hilarious cameo by George Lucas on the O.C. when he says that instead of going to his senior prom, he sat at home thinking up Jar Jar and the Ewoks). After seeing the third one, I actually appreciate the first two a little more because they make a little more sense. You can actually see things were in fact building towards events in Episode III. And as for Episode III itself: Frickin’ great. Seriously, this is the first of the new Star Wars to actually make me feel as I was watching it that this is how people must’ve felt watching the originals when the first came out. The opening space battle was excellent though I felt a little short as far as the actually space battling went. The rescue of the chancellor is a good introduction to Anakin’s beginning decline to the dark side as well as a good intro of General Grievous (who by the way, is nothing like he’s portrayed in the Clone Wars mini-series). The dialogue at the beginning of the movie, let’s face it, isn’t fantastic, especially between Natalie Portman and Hayden Christiansen. It’s initially very reminiscent of the Episode II dialogue. Luckily, this improves as the movie goes on. The person who absolutely makes this movie is Ian McDiarmind as Palpatine. He’s just fantastic as little by little he lures Anakin to the dark side. And it’s done brilliantly I feel. Anakin’s problem is that he’s a super powerful Jedi, yet all the other Jedi, with the exception of Obi-Wan, treat him like he’s just a normal kid. He’s arrogant and impatient but you feel like he’d get over it if the Jedi council members would just treat him like an equal. Instead the only who treats him as an equal is the friggin’ bad guy! And after all that he still knows that what he’s doing is wrong but he does it anyways. Why? Cause he fears losing his wife. It’s such a normal thing to fear but the Jedi spend all there time telling him not to form these attachments that can (and will) be exploited and none of them actually think for a second, well what happens if he does it anyways? So who does he turn to? The only person who actually says, yes, I can help you. He makes a deal with the devil. And it’s painful to watch this guy who is just trying to do the right thing, fall completely. There’s a scene where Obi-Wan goes off on a mission and he is saying goodbye to Anakin and they’re joking around and talking like the best of friends and it’s just so sad when you realize, this is it, this is the last time they’ll ever be friends. There’s also a great scene when Anakin is debating what to do that’s just really well shot as it’s completely silent but it displaces shots of Anakin and Padme in two separate places staring out the windows as time is running out for Anakin to make a decision and it gets to the point that it looks like they’re looking across this city at each other. There are more character moments in this movie than in the previous two combined. And seeing as I how I just spent more time on those than any of the action sequences should tell you something. And by the way, the effects are excellent. When a completely CGI character is substituted for a real one, it’s still not perfect but it’s getting there. The final duel between Anakin and Obi-Wan is just brutal (this movie earns its PG-13 rating) and the ending of it is fantastic but it sure doesn’t leave you feeling good inside. In fact this whole movie is one helluva downer. Luckily, it’s also one helluva good movie. And it’s very cool seeing Darth Vader finally rise. It’s also really weird to think, that’s it. No more Star Wars. I felt the same thing after Return of the King but this is a little different. The LOTOR series came out in 3 years. This new trilogy has been coming out since high school. If you include the whole series, it’s been coming out my entire life. Strange to think that there won’t be anymore. But I’m damn happy with the note it’s gone out on. And if nothing else, we’ll have multiple editions of the DVDs to buy over the years.

Ok, so by my count that makes 3 out of my 5 most anticipated summer movies over with. Batman Begins is up next on June 15^th. If anything the look of the movie is better than anything Joel Schumacher did with the last two. Nipples on the Batsuit? What the hell was he smoking?

Quick news and notes:

Booter updated the blog. Go Booter!

Crowley updated the blog. Go Crowley!

The strip has been slowed with updates recently due to my lack of sleep. But I’m getting them out. Eventually.

Scrubs on DVD!

Until next time:

At what point did I become a crazy person?

Oh, come on. Yes, exposing yourself to a dead guy might have been a tad unorthodox; and yes, it might be a little hard to live down....

I'm waiting for the "but."

So is everyone else around here.

Jesus loves me. He loves me a bunch. That's why he puts Skippy in my lunch.

Greetings all. Not a huge update today as I’m completely wiped from work.

So another season over for Scrubs. Sad am I. Interesting setup for next season though. With Elliot leaving the hospital is she being written off or possibly downgraded to guest star? I know a certain person of short stature would be most distraught if that was the case. Also is Jordan being set up to be more of a main character push rather than the occasional guest star? We’ll just have to wait and see I suppose.

So Scrubs is the first show of mine to end along with Veronica Mars. Gilmore Girls and the OC end next week. Luckily there’s still another 3 weeks of Lost. And judging by the previews, it’s gonna be strong all the way til the 2 hour finale.

The summer is fast approaching folks. Now if my damn apartment complex pool would just open. I’m in the mood for margaritas and grilling by the pool.

Music to listen to:

The White Stripes – Elephant

Love the opening guitar riff on Seven Nation Army. In fact the bluesy guitar work in general on this album is just great and shouts to be cranked out as loud as your speaker goes. The softer, balladesque songs like You’ve Got Her in Your Pocket are also quite fine here.

Nick Drake – Pink Moon

Continuing in the talented artists who died way too young (yeah, I also recommend Jeff Buckley), you may have caught him on the Garden State soundtrack. Very calm, almost hauntingly so, this album is just beautiful and brilliant.

News and Notes:

Again I must ask: where didst all the other blogs go?

If there’s one thing TV has taught me, it’s that a good Joseph Stalin gag will redeem any slow episode.

Seriously, I’ve got nothing.

Until next time:

“Hey, settle down!”

“I don’t have to listen to you. You’re a dog. You don’t have a soul!”

“Ouch!”

Let he who is without sin kick the first ass!

Ah, the Family Guy is back and as offensive and irreverent as ever. The Passion of the Christ 2 spoof was hilarious. And Ollie the weatherman is back: He gonna get it!

To say things have been busy lately is an understatement akin to saying I wasn’t all the surprised when Britney Spears announced she was pregnant.

Well, new Family Guy episodes are something to look forward to as we head into finale season. Lost is back after a great cliffhanger and no one has any idea where the hell they’re going with any of this. And I couldn’t be happier.

Now onto my review of the second on my top 5 anticipated summer movies list:

THE HITCHIKER’S GUIDE TO THE GALAXY:
From what I read people are pretty split on this movie. Non-fans either loved the zaniness of it all or just didn’t get it. Fans either loved the reverence given to Douglas’ works or hated the changes made. Personally, I loved it. I won’t say much that hasn’t already been said in other favorable reviews. The casting is great. Sam Rockwell is just insane and is one of my favorite actors today. Martin Freeman is the perfect Arthur Dent. Mos Def brings the subtleness to Ford found in the books. Zooey Deschanel is good as Trillian though I always thought she was a little less happy-go-lucky in the books than she’s portrayed in the movie. Marvin is great and Alan Rickman could not have been a more perfect choice to voice him. Supporting cast members also do a superb job. The opening musical number (yes, musical number) was the perfect way to kick off the movie and show just how crazy this movie is gonna be. I was worried at how they were going to supply all the narrative background which provides some of the funniest moments in the books but those fears were put to rest as the Guide itself is used to supply this information in a voiceover. And let me tell you, the Guide might be the funniest part of the whole movie. The fact that they kept the whale and petunias scene from the book made me so happy especially with the Guide narrating the petunia’s thoughts. And the Vogon bureaucracy was hilarious. The spoof on attempting a gun blazin’ jailbreak only to be reduced to filling out forms was just great. There were two issues I had with the movie. One was the romantic subplot added between Arthur and Trillian. That reeked too much of Disney interference and just didn’t not need to be in there. Not every movie needs bloody romance in it! Second was that there were too many open ends which probably were left in for the sequels that I do sincerely hope they make. But I’m not a fan of doing things like that unless they specifically say that this is part of one of a larger movie ala Lord of the Rings. And I’m not talking about small characters saying something cryptic that will be answered in another film. I’m talking whole big scenes in the movie that just don’t get resolved (as in the entire reason John Malkovich is even in the movie). But those quibbles aside, I laughed my ass off at this movie and while I may be a fan of the books, I think anyone who enjoys quirky, off the wall yet still halfway intelligent humor will enjoy this movie.

Next up: Star Wars: Episode III – Revenge of the Sith
(please don’t suck, please don’t suck, please done suck.)

News and notes:

Snuck in a few random updates to the strip to make up for the week I took off.

Finally finished KOTOR so I can have my life back again. I even beat Crowley to it though me sabotaging his hard drive might have had something to do with it. Mwa ha ha!

Now there’s the second one to attend to… damn!

Alright all, until next time:

"Mr. Simpson, how do you respond to the charges that petty vandalism such as graffiti is down eighty percent, while heavy sack-beatings are up a shocking nine hundred percent?"

"Oh, people can come up with statistics to prove anything, Kent. Forty percent of all people know that."

"I see. Well, what do you say to the accusation that your group has been causing more crimes than it's been preventing?"

"Oh, Kent, I'd be lying if I said my men weren't committing crimes."

"...Touche'."

Remind me to tell you about the time my mom wore a shirt with a rhinestone penis and my grandmother had her car towed.

I won’t lie, I laughed harder at last night’s Gilmore Girls than I laughed during just about any other show this year not named Scrubs. And yes for the last time I’m straight!

Not much going on chicos and chicas. Mets are continuing to be interesting to watch (did you see Saturday’s beatdown on the Nationals?) and therefore by them not sucking, I’m happy. I’ll actually be catching the game this Friday when they’re in town to play the Nats again.

Albums you should be listening to:

Franz Ferdinand – Franz Ferdinand
The guitar riff on Take Me Out alone is worth the price of admission but this is also a really good album. Reminded me a little of Modest Mouse’s latest… if Modest Mouse was singing all the time as opposed to screaming. Check out the opener Jacqueline as well as Matinee. This album is meant to be played with the amp at 11.

Elliot Smith – From A Basement On The Hill
Unbelievably tragic, the loss of this ridiculously talented artist. This album was still in development when Smith died so it’ll never actually be known what it would’ve sounded like had he completed it. But released as it was as it was, this is a pretty powerful album. And I dare you to listen to A Fond Farewell knowing the circumstance of Smith’s death and not get emotional.

News and Notes:

FAMILY GUY IS BACK!!! THIS SUNDAY!!!! GIGGITY GIGGITY GIGGITY!!!

Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy comes out this Friday. Wooooooooo!

Have you noticed that the new ads for XXX 2 have the Who playing in the background? Ok, XXX is supposed to be the new "anti"-Bond for the young generation. Last one was all about crazy punk music. So they figured the Who would really entice the teenage crowd? What the hell are these idiots thinking?

The new Gavin DeGraw music video for Chariot directed by Zach Braff is out. Great cameo by Donald Faison (Turk) in it. And I love DeGraw’s album and I think he’s an extraordinarily talented artist but damn, he might be one of the ugliest men on earth. Maybe it was just bad makeup and wardrobe but yikes man, get some sun.

Ripping off the Zach Braff blog but still funny as hell: http://www.realpie.com/funny_video/video_pop.html

New trailer for Serenity is out and damn I wanna see that movie.

Strip back up and running. AOL’s been fussy lately for some reason so if you get a page cannot be displayed error just refresh your browser.

Alright banditos y banditas, until next time:

"Unforunately for Jake he still had to pass mustard with Turk and me and nothing is quite as daunting as our good guy test."

"Well I could use a beer."

"I got this round. Be right back."

"Good guy!"
"Great guy!"
"Nice choice!"