They Got the Mustard Out

Do you think Joss Whedon just sits around laughing maniacly at all the emotional trauma he inflicts?

2008-07-20T17:57:00.001-04:00

That said, Dr. Horrible is still fantastic.

Joss Whedon is my hero

2008-07-18T09:12:00.002-04:00

With Neil Patrick Harris as a close second.

Dr. Horrible's Sing-a-long Blog

Watch it for all it's worth as they're yanking it on Sunday night
(haven't figured out why).

Why Hellboy II will be the greatest movie of the summer

2008-07-01T12:51:00.002-04:00

And why I love James Lipton

Holy crap, Megaman 9 is retro NES style on WiiWare!

2008-06-26T14:56:00.001-04:00

Amazing? Um, yes!

http://www.rockmanpm.com/

RIP George Carlin

2008-06-24T12:47:00.000-04:00

Finally we can take a slap shot on the Wii!

2008-06-13T09:51:00.002-04:00

http://wii.ign.com/articles/881/881312p1.html

It's about time they brought an NHL game to the Wii. There isn't a single sport out there more suited to the Wii-Mote's capabilities. Stick handling, aiming your shot, fighting... it's perfect!

Annnd, shrinkage.

2008-05-31T00:18:00.002-04:00

Please let Joss Whedon write Spider-man. Please, please, please.

Good Job MLB

2008-05-30T13:16:00.000-04:00

When I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story.

2008-05-28T11:53:00.002-04:00

So why didn't anyone tell me How I Met Your Mother was so damn funny? Seriously, this is a show that takes me back to the very best years of Scrubs. Neil Patrick Harris has mined his comedic genius first discovered in Harold and Kumar to new levels and Jason Segal has a steady job. Who knew?

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull - What the hell, George Lucas? 3/4 of a good Indiana Jones movie spoiled by an ending that was so overt in it's supernatural elements that I was left unable to argue with Erin when she turned to me and said "This is retarded." The whole point of Indiana Jones is that the supernatural/theological elements are left mostly unexplained. That's how I can accept the Ark of the Covenant killing/melting the faces of the Nazis. But there's nothing left ambiguous about this ending (which decided that theology was too outdated, let's go X-Files). Which is too bad because I was enjoying the hell out of myself for the first 3/4 of the movie or, what I'll term, the Spielberg parts. Good chases scenes, action, comedy all rolled into one with Harrison Ford's smirk making me forget how long ago it was he was last in big fun roles like this. Shia LaBeouf didn't really piss me off all that much and the rest of the cast does fine with what it's got. It didn't help that John Hurt is cast in another Prof. Bruttenholm role which Dwain summed up nicely after the "Space between spaces" line by stating "You know, where Hellboy lives." So I'm giving up on Lucas. Sorry, I'll go back to my original trilogies and enjoying the fun that was the 80's. Maybe I'll watch this movie on DVD and just stop once they get to the "Kingdom".

News and Notes:

Joss Whedon finally finishes up his astounding run on Astonishing X-men today. I'm actually excited for comic book. I'm a little sad.

Interesting Q&A session with Peter Jackson and Guillermo Del Toro on the Hobbit movies: http://www.wetanz.com/holics/index.php?itemid=695&catid=2#more

Ok, so the Mets won a game against the Marlins. Now let's make it 2 in a row and we're only 4.5 out. Baby steps...

Until next time:

"Miracle!"

"A pencil entered Barney's nose and you call it a miracle?"

"Do you have a better explanation for it?"

"A drunk jackass with a box of pencils?"

"A drunk jackass called God and a box of pencils called Destiny"

I Love Midnight Train to Georgia

2008-05-22T18:42:00.001-04:00

I'm sure everyone has seen it a hundred times by now. But it's still funny:

I've always loved fortune cookies. You reach into the bowl and randomly select something that applies to you and only you.

2008-05-11T22:22:00.008-04:00

Mustard: So absent lately.

Iron Man:
Take everything you loved about Spider-Man. The action, the comedy, the fun. And then take away what you didn't like: A whole lot of saccharine, nail grating dialogue that even the greatest acting talent in the world couldn't pull off let alone Kirstin Dunst. That's Iron Man. Robert Downey Jr. is everything you could have hoped for as Tony Stark and more. Sure Toby Maguire has the funny/nerdy side of Peter Parker down. Robert Downey Jr. has the funny/cool/bit of a jerk side of Tony Stark. He's George Clooney in a Metal suit. Hell, even the slightly generic Iron Monger villain works out terrific thanks to Jeff Bridges portrayal (hey Willam Defoe, it is possible to be tiny bit over the top without needing the Heimlich from chewing so much scenery). I won't say this definitely the best Marvel movie ever but it's right up there with Spidey 2 and X2.

Mario Kart Wii:
Ok, I really came in not expecting much from this game. Yeah, it's Mario Kart and the only game I may have played more than the original Mario Kart was Mario Kart 64. But I just wasn't as blown away by Double Dash (despite being one of the few who did enjoy the 2 rider gimmick) and hadn't heard a whole lot of great things about this one. I still am not a huge fan of choosing your kart but other than that, this game kicks ass. The bikes are a neat addition. The online mode is the best time I've had playing online with the Wii, and the throwback tracks bring back some great memories (Mario Raceway from N64... the amount of time spent trying to break the 2 minute mark on that sucker). And it's the first game since Wii Sports to have really good Mii integration. I'm racing as me! Woo! It's Mario Kart at it's best so what are you waiting for?

Netflix Roku:
Look, this is a cool box for those of you who don't have laptops or media pc, but it's not the panacea of digital media people are making it out to be and it's not really all that much of a competitor to the appleTV. Granted, the appleTV is a niche market but it's a media server. You can store files on it and play them. The Roku basically just take the place of hooking my laptop up via an S-video cable to my TV. Great it you don't have a laptop, but talk to me when it's got a hard drive and can play stored files. And for all those reports about how few Netflix Top 100 movies are available for watch instantly, these are the current top 10:

Crash
The Departed
The Pursuit of Happyness
Little Miss Sunshine
Walk the Line
Mr. and Mrs. Smith
The Devil Wears Prada
Blood Diamond
Hotel Rwanda
The Notebook

It's not like they're the hottest movies out right now.

News and Notes:

They've announced Runaways. Now get Brian K. Vaughn to script it and Joss Whedon to direct and this could be an amazing movie. Get Don Payne to script and Brian Robbins to direct and we can weep for the future.

So the Mets were just handed a 4 game sweep by the Braves. F&*@!!!

Indiana Jones tonight. Show us you can still handle Lucas' writing, Spielberg. Please!

Until next time:

"Is she okay? Is my mom alright?"

"Calm down, Tolchuck. If something were seriously wrong, I would've found you myself, which reminds me, you know which class Kenny Henderson's in?"

"What? No!"

"Mmm...I would not want to be him right now."

It's the nerdiness in life you treasure

2008-04-30T11:49:00.001-04:00

-xkcd

When life gives you lemons, just say 'F&%@ the lemons' and bail ... aka my Summer Movie Preview

2008-04-29T13:46:00.005-04:00

Mustard: Like the Incredible Hulk without Ang Lee.

Iron Man:
I still can't believe Jon Favreau cast Robert Downey Jr. as Tony Stark. Is there anyone enjoying a better resurgence in his career right now? He's suddenly the new Johnny Depp (and if you don't think Johnny Depp had a slump in his career you haven't seen The Ninth Gate or the Astronaut's Wife). In addition to Downey, it's got Terrence Howard, Jeffrey Lebowski, Stan Winston doing the practical effects plus the guy Sayid killed on last week's Lost. I mean even Gwyneth Paltrow can't annoy the hell out me in this movie, can she? Right? Maybe?

Wall*E:
It's a cruel twist of life that I've seen both Rush Hour 3 and Smoking Aces but I've yet to see Ratatouille. Hopefully this will be rectified soon. But I am excited for any new Pixar flick that may or may not have ripped off it's main character's design from Short Circuit. Yes Virginia, Johnny Five is alive.

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull:
It's Indiana Frakkin' Jones. I wouldn't't care if Harrison Ford used a walker the entire movie. I don't care that George Lucas lost all story writing credibility with Episodes 1-3. It's directed by Spielberg. It has Cate Blanchett, Ray Winstone, and a freakishly unaged Karen Allen. Let's just hope there's some face melting left in. I'm still traumatized by the heart rip from Temple of Doom.

The Dark Knight:
Sure, the death of Heath Ledger is going to make this a little eerie but after the disappointment of Superman Returns and the outright cancellation of Joss Whedon's Wonder Woman (Damn you Warner Bros!), it's time for DC to get a major quality movie back out there. Who knows? We might not even miss Katie Holmes (read: we won't miss Katie Holmes).

Hellboy II: The Golden Army
The first Hellboy was a wonderful movie and anyone who doesn't agree is just plain wrong. Guillermo Del Toro has a few more Oscar statuettes to prove his case as a quality storyteller and I'm looking forward to Ron Perlman being back in the red makeup. And then we move on the The Hobbit. Giggity.

The final slot is a two way split: Get Smart and Pineapple Express. The Mel Brooks created Get Smart was quite possibly my favorite TV show when I was young. Don Adams was a comedic genius. So Steve Carell stepping into the shoes is just a dream (I could've made a shoe phone joke there but I'm sure someone already has beaten that joke to death so let's just move on, shall we?). Alan Arkin as the Chief and General Zod as Siegfried are also perfect casting. But the trailer? Not so great. I'm just worried the script and directing are going to turn this into Steve Martin's The Pink Panther. And then I will cry. Pineapple Express on the other hand had a great trailer (which may have unduly influenced me with it's use of M.I.A.'s Paper Planes) and Ed Begley Jr. The latest from Mr. Apatow's clique could be a brilliant stoner comedy or could be dumb as Steve Martin's The Pink Panther. Time will tell.

P.S. Speaking of the Apatow clique, go see Forgetting Sarah Marshall. Freaking hilarious.

Until next time:

"There's only one cure for pain like that."

"What?"

"Weed. Ya got any?"

"No."

"Well then let's just go surfing!"

This is the type of Monday morning it was

2008-04-28T21:32:00.002-04:00

This conversation came up in relation to the Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker theme party these people http://www.dasbecca.com/ threw for their 5 year old.

See the absurd and yet awesome detail they put into it:

http://www.flickr.com/photos/dasbecca/2443797209/in/set-72157604730591124/

Jeff: Someday when I have a kid, I can only hope to compete with this party.

Erin: Jeff, I will never hand-stitch deku people or make a Zelda pinata. Or make bird people costumes. Or give 5 year olds swords. Did you guys see the Hero cake though? Yeah, I'm not making that either.

Jeff: Honey, I’m not saying you have to hand-stitch deku people or make a Zelda piñata. That’s just silly. You don’t even play Zelda games. So what we’ll need to do is make a little Kirby costume for the baby and give him a baseball bat. Crowley, you can be Wario but you take those whacks like a man and no running over my kid with a motorcycle, do you hear me?

Crowley: Alright, no motorcycle, but I reserve the right to use the rest of his stuff... including the garlic powered superheroism and the down-and-B attack. If the kid hits me with a bat, he's ASKING for a return volley of flatulence.

Jeff: You hear that hon? Crowley's going to fart on our baby.

Erin: I'd expect him to do that even if he wasn't Wario.

Crowley: Remember, there were stipulations there. Only if the kid hits me with the bat. Or tries to swallow me or cook me in a pot. You know, whatever. Hell, even if it drops on me like a rock from twenty feet up. I'm going to leave my options open.

Of course this got me thinking that we must have a Smash Bros party complete with smash ball pinata and bean bag pikmin.

If it couldn't be Peter Jackson...

2008-04-24T22:09:00.002-04:00

Guillermo Del Toro! Yes!!!

Guillermo del Toro to direct 'Hobbit'

Please let Ron Perlman be the voice of Smaug. Please let Ron Perlman be the voice of Smaug. Please let Ron Perlman be the voice of Smaug.

Twitter remains a mystery to me

2008-04-23T16:12:00.004-04:00

I just keep laughing every time I read it:

-penny arcade

Merciful Grand Galactic Inquisitor, This Can't Come Soon Enough

2008-04-22T20:37:00.002-04:00

GO TEAM VENTURE!!!

I just don't see what wrong with having a nice glass of wine with a pancake.

2008-04-15T12:31:00.004-04:00

Mustard: Mahalo version.

So just back from a nice trip to Oahu where I did indeed managed to get up on the surf board. I have the pictures to prove it:

Can someone tell me what's going on with airline services? I realize that airlines are trying to cut down on costs but when you're only giving me one mini-bag of pretzels and The Devil Wears Prada for a 6 hour flight, that's pretty pathetic. Speaking of terrible in-flight movies:

Rush Hour 3 - A thousand monkeys typing on a thousand typewriters would scream and throw their poo at the screen if ever forced to watch this worthless waste of celluloid. I now retroactively hate X3 even more after seeing this latest abomination of Brett Ratner.

The Golden Compass - I consider myself a pretty intuitive guy when it comes to movies. And I can watch a disjointed movie and usually find myself accepting convoluted or even gapping holes in logic. But even after wikipedi-ing the source material for this movie, it doesn't make a whole lot of sense. Not to mention Nicole Kidman doesn't speak in a normal voice the entire movie. She whispers every single line she has like she's just awestruck to be acting opposite a CG monkey. And I like Freddy Highmore. In general he's one of the few child actors who doesn't either outright suck at acting or who doesn't overcompensate by chewing the scenery Broadway style. But he just is terrible in the voice over role. Maybe it's due to recording his lines alone in a studio but he never seems to be conversing in the same tone as the real actors he's supposed to be talking to.

News and Notes:

Finally watched 3:10 to Yuma. What is up with Alan Tudyk always being killed after a funny one liner?

Baseball season is back. C'mon Mets, let's get those bats going. And stop having your pitchers getting injured.

Summer movie season is almost upon us. Stay tuned for the summer movie preview. Coming soon to a Mustard near you.

Until next time:

"It's awesome! It's like the Sith Lords man, there's always only two of them."

"Did you just Star Wars us?"

Eff You Major League Baseball

2008-03-31T16:45:00.003-04:00

You got$650 million dollars from XM radio to broadcast on their service but won't let them do it through their web based service? I'm already paying XM and you money grubbing douchebags want me to pay an additional $15 to stream the audio to my computer? What other nickel and diming can you come up with? Why don't you try to copyright names and facts? Oh, wait, you already tried that!

Isn't it enough to know that I ruined a pony making a gift for you?

2008-03-17T11:30:00.002-04:00

Mustard: Like a Guinness on St. Patrick's Day.

Lá Fhéile Pádraig sona daoibh! I hope you're all out following the companies take line and drinking Guinness responsibly. But probably not.

Has anyone else noticed how hard it is to find a movie in theaters you actually want to go see? Sure, I kinda want to see both Semi Pro and In Bruges but with the ease of Netflix and the movie studios feverous desire to release movies on DVD within minutes of their box office revenue taking a dip, it's getting harder and harder to justify paying $10 for a non-prime movie in theaters. I'm sure studio execs would hate to hear that but they just posted record revenue for 2008 based on those higher ticket prices so they can wipe the the tears away with ten dollar bills.

Smash Bros - I love this game. I'm a little annoyed at all the bashing about the Sub Space Emissary Story Mode and all the complaints that it amounts to glorified fan fiction. Hello? What do you think Smash Bros is? It's a fighting game in which Mario can take on Link and Kirby can beat up on Star Fox. It's literally the old "who would win in a fight" discussion. And you're upset when this doesn't yield a Michael Gondry-esque narrative (actually given the increasingly surreal scripts he's generated lately, he might have come up with something like this)? So for Sakurai's sake, lay off the "story doesn't make sense" whining and just enjoy the fact that the cut scenes are entertaining, the mode is something new and different for the series and the game itself is still unbelievably fun. Now if you don't mind I'm gonna go practice a little more so my wife will stop beating me with Kirby (that frakking cooking smash).

News and Notes:

Notre Dame vs. George Mason in round one. It'll be interesting around here for that game.

Baseball is almost upon us. Amen to that.

The Return of Jezebel James - new show by Amy Sherman Palladino. It's ok but that laugh track is so horrendous. It absolutely kills the humor.

Until next time:

"So, you just finished off the bottle?"

"Well, I had to. It's vodka, you know. It goes bad once it's opened."

"I think that's another one of mum's little fibs. You know, like, I'll sacrifice anything for my children."

In case you were wondering

2008-03-09T10:47:00.002-04:00

Yes, I've already bought it.

Fisher we hardly knew ye and Musicians who do drugs

2008-03-07T15:28:00.005-05:00

What a sad time in that Fisher Stevens' character arc on Lost was over before it started. Only one episode and our illustrious character actor was killed off. Such a shame.

On the other we're actually going more obscure by the sudden appearance of actor Kevin Durand as another other Other. If you're thinking, "Hey, wasn't he one of the crazy Tremor brothers in Smokin' Aces?" then I feel sorry for you cause that means you've actually seen Smokin' Aces (how the eff do you make an action shoot 'em up that pretentious, Joe Carnahan? HOW!?). You may also recognize him from his less psychotic role as Tree in Mystery, Alaska.

Speaking of character actors, after watching Coffee and Cigarettes I've come to two conclusions:
1. I think it would be fascinating to do a comparison of who's done more drugs, Iggy Pop or Keith Richards.
2. If they ever make a movie biopic about Tom Waits, Ron Perlman absolutely has to star. I mean just look at them:

I shall return in a nonce. At most, two nonces.

2008-03-04T22:36:00.003-05:00

Mustard: like sands through the hourglass.

Can I ask why on earth Harmonix has not at least announced a release date for Rock Band on Wii? It makes no sense. It would take very little effort to port the PS2 version to Wii. Granted, it would be nice if they could add in the online mode missing in that version. But Guitar Hero III on Wii per NDP data was the 3rd best selling game across all consoles for both January and December amounting to over 2 million units sold. Don't you think by releasing the game onto what is obviously a receptive market for this type of game could help them recoup the supposed $200 million it cost to develop the game? Just a thought.

Only a few more days until the release of Super Smash Bros. Brawl. Given how it's look so far, I see little reason to sleep for the next few weeks or so. Seriously, it's got a stage that looks like the original DK arcade game:

How ridiculously cool is that?

Indie album of the week for your listening pleasure: VHS or Beta's Bring on the Comets. Little bit of the Killers. Little bit of Interpol. Little bit of Franz Ferdinand. Incredibly entertaining. Burn It All Down made by best of 2007 playlist (narrowly beating out Can't Believe a Single Word). Check it out.

News and notes:

Did anyone notice Fred Armisen's impression of Barak Obama on SNL the other night? When did Obama suddenly become Bullwinkle?

Au revoir Brett Favre.

Slow going for movies right now. Though Leatherheads has a chance to be entertaining in a few weeks. If the trailers are any indication, George Clooney is fully channeling the Cohen brothers. Strange fact, the movie is co-written by Sports Illustrated columnist Rick Reilly. Weird.

Until next time:

"Nobody plays jazz at the Pit Stop!"

"Then why is the song on the jukebox?"

"We use it for profiling purposes. We also have the Pet Shop Boys and Seal."

The sad part is I think this would be awesome.

2008-03-03T13:00:00.002-05:00

-foxtrot

God Bless Jon Favreau

2008-02-28T22:41:00.002-05:00

Drink and be merry, for tomorrow we will be in a great deal of pain

2008-02-27T22:48:00.004-05:00

Mustard. So hot right now. Mustard.

Back from a ridiculously quick weekend trip to San Francisco by way of San Jose. Due to my inability to properly calculate distances, Erin and I managed to pull of a 12 mile walking tour of the city including the harbor, Chinatown and some of the sketchiest areas of a major city I've ever walked through. But damned if we weren't going to see those Full House houses. Needless to say, after all that walking I've been doing a wonderful impression of Javier Bardem's Oscar winning performance sans the terrible hair and bolt pistol.

Speaking of the Oscar's, someone was looking down from on high this Sunday at the Oscars when 'Falling Slowly' from Once took the prize for best song over a trio of Disney songs. Amen to that. Seriously, if you haven't seen the movie yet, the scene with that song is easily the best music moment in a movie since Stillwater belted out 'Tiny Dancer' on a cross country bus trip. Even the performance at the Oscars was oustanding as was Jon Stewart's save of poor Markéta Irglová who was almost gipped out of her acceptance speech.

Can someone explain to me how 2 different Black Eyed Peas got cast in two major movies? will.i.am gets cast in the upcoming Wolverine movie and Taboo is going to be in the new Street Fighter movie. Two questions come to mind. One, is this because Fergie suddenly became a break out single star and the rest of the band is heading the way of No Doubt and Matchbox 20, waiting for the star to get bored of their solo pop status to make a pity album with them? Two, how did Taboo get screwed on this casting? Talk about losing the coin toss. Do you think they'll at least give him a speech worthy of the Street Fighter name:

News and Notes:

So read the League of Extraordinary Gentlemen: The Black Dossier. I get it Alan Moore. You're smarter and much better read than I am. Thanks for making me feel next to illiterate.

If you're not on board the Jonathan Coulton train, you're not living.

The Browns look to be tendering a 3 year, $20 million offer to Derek Anderson. Sucks to be Brady Quinn right now.

Variety reports that Jeffrey Katzenberg is blaming videogames for the weaker than expected sales of Shrek 3 on DVD. Apparently Katzenberg has never seen the movie. He's lucky he managed to bamboozle $300 million out of people in the theaters with that worthless cash-in.

Until next time:

"Is that the woman you lost your virginity to?"

"Who?"

"The one that looks like Ronnie Corbett."

"That is Ronnie Corbett. Why would she be wearing a tuxedo?"

"She might be a lesbian."

"Then why would I lose my virginity to a lesbian?"

"Don't know. She might have turned lesbian after you slept with her."

But will he bring a gun to a knife fight?

2008-02-15T10:54:00.000-05:00

Is Canada still ruled by the queen of England? Because if the judges there are gonna be wearing wigs, as an American, I might have an issue with that.

2008-02-09T16:54:00.000-05:00

Mustard: Once upon a time, it actually existed regularly

Ok, 2008 has been here for quite some time. But it's been a little busy this past month but I've finally found some time to put up my feet, stretch my legs and attempt to write a semi-coherent blog post.

So what have I been up to lately? Guitar Hero. Lots and lots of Guitar Hero. It became the focus of New Years. It's become the focus of a many a weekend. And rightly so. It’s gotten to the point where I’ve been having trouble sleeping as my brain is playing My Name is Jonas on repeat. Now we just need Rock Band to come out for the Wii and all bets are off.

Combine that with my love of Mario Galaxy and I just don’t foresee when sleep will come into play in the near future. Oh and then there’s Smash Bros in a month. And may God have mercy on my soul.

Johan Santana going to the Mets. That makes the 2008 season a whole lot brighter on the rotation side. Now let's shore up the relief situation and make sure they don't get completely burnt out by September.

Lost: It's been way too long since good TV was last on? Ok, Pushing Daisies has only been done for a short time now. But man, it feels longer than that.

So after watching Wonderfalls, I feel more and more guilty that I did not watch the show when it was on. To be fair, Fox only did air 4 episodes but I haven’t been this retroactively bummed since I finished watching Firefly.

A "tentative" deal has been reached to end the writers' strike. Now was that so hard?

If my heart is a little broken Peter Jackson isn't going to be directing the new Hobbit movie, Guillermo Del Toro replacing him makes everything a whole lot better. Now make it work studios.

Until next time:

I don't even like waterparks. I mean I did, until someone thought it'd be funny to go down the slide two seconds after me.

Dude, the lifeguard told me to go.

Really? Did he also tell you to take your trunks off, Turk? Because the last thing a guy wants to see when he's in a splash pool is his best friend's junk headed towards him at forty miles per hour. Felt like I got pistol-whipped

SWEET MERCIFUL CRAP!

2008-02-04T00:05:00.000-05:00

Eff-ing Eli Manning just won the Super Bowl. Hahahahahaha!

First Oscar Prediction

2008-01-22T14:04:00.001-05:00

A pun will be made involving 83 year old Ruby Dee's nomination for best supporting actress for American Gangster, 82 year old Hal Holbrook's nomination for best supporting actor for Into the Wild and No Country For Old Men's best picture nomination. And it will suck.

An open letter to the HFP

2008-01-12T17:50:00.000-05:00

Dear Hollywood Foreign Press:

The Savages is not a comedy. While it has a comedic moment or two (mostly in an awkward sense), is it for the most part a tragic look at the conditions facing the elderly in our society and the effects this has on their families. It is a very good movie with excellent performances by both Philip Seymour Hoffman and Laura Linney. It would seem that Ms. Linney was left off the nomination list because, unlike Mr. Hoffman, she does not have that one particular scene where she manages to go on a large rant which is apparently needed by you voters in order to earn a nomination. Yes, what a pity that subtlety is not longer valued in an actor's repertoire. But I digress. When I walk out of a movie emotionally exhausted, I'm afraid I'm not thinking, "Remember that one part where Philip Seymour Hoffman is in that portable traction sling and looks ridiculous? Ha ha, what a funny movie." Really, I can only come to two conclusions: One, that you didn't actually see this movie. Two, you are all sick sick people who find dismal portrayals of dysfunctional families dealing with terrible situations funny. In the words of my wife, "this was one of the most depressing movies I've ever seen." You can recognize great performances but let's be a little intelligent about what type of movie they're in, what do you say?

Sincerely,
Mr. Snow

P.S. Next letter we start talking about why you can't eliminate the "musical" clarification entirely. If it's a musical drama, just put it there.

Well your Honor, the seven deadly sins are not like the Constitution, they can't be amended. So if I were you yes, I'd be worried.

2007-11-28T20:10:00.000-05:00

Mustard: always worth the wait.

So how bad has Heroes been? I mean sweet Odin's raven, I can't stop myself from laughing whenever Hayden Panattiere is on screen. The stilted dialog and painful attempts to emote are of a level unseen since Shannon Elizabeth in Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back. Hayden isn't completely to blame. The best parts of the show are Hiro and Ando and their in friggin' Japanese! Even Kristen Bell looks like she's wondering if maybe she should have taken up that offer to be on Lost. Never has a show had so many characters and actors that I actually like and yet I find myself hating the actual show itself. Damn you Tim Kring!

Meanwhile Chuck has finally grown to the point where I almost can't tell Josh Schwartz still misses Adam Brody. Almost. Adding Rachel Bilson to the mix for a few episodes didn't help.

All these people complaining that the Golden Compass is anti-Catholic. Just because the author is atheist and the books are essentially about a quest to overthrow the Church and heaven? Let's keep some perspective here. I mean Kevin Smith actually killed God in Dogma.... (s)he got better.

So will Smash Bros Brawl be the greatest video ever? I don't know. But it has pixelated 8-bit Excitebikes as weapons. How phenominal is that? Not to mention it has a character whose super power turns him into this:

Dah dah dah! Wario Man!

So has anyone else heard of shockheaded Peter? It's apparently a popular German children's story about a kid whose mother tells him not to suck his thumb. When he doesn't heed her, a tailor comes along with scissors and cuts off his thumbs! What the f$%# is wrong with the Germans!? Seriously, this is what you read to your kids? I would have nightmares for an effing month if my mom read me this story when I was young.

News and Notes:

Quis custodiet ipsos custodes? Zack Snyder, that's who.

So the Irish limp off into the sunset 3-9... so... how bout them Giants?

Mets in the running for Johan Santana? But what will they have to give up?

Until next time:

"Look carefully, ladies; this is your future."

"Is it vodka?"

"Water."

"As in Russian for vodka?"

Happy Thanksgiving

2007-11-24T00:34:00.000-05:00

Yes I'm still alive

Suck on that, Tony Shaloub.

2007-10-26T13:29:00.000-04:00

It's good to have Scrubs back, isn't it?

It's not just that Pushing Daisies is the best new show on TV that's amazing. It's how much better the show is than all everything else. Look, I enjoy Chuck and Reaper and Dirty Sexy Money but compared to Pushing Daisies they're just not even close. It's like the TV gods are trying to make up for taking Veronica Mars away from me.

Speaking of which, Ms. Bell made her debut on Heroes to much aplomb. Ok, so she really had 3 scenes and basically got to shoot some lightening and that was about it. But she was darn good going it.

Which is more than I can say for the rest of the show. Ok, the writers of the show are trying to frame this as a comic book. Except comic book series follow one character or team around. They don't attempt to cram 25 different story arcs in a one time where there's no way they can touch on even half of them in an issue. I'm sorry, either bring them into a relevant storyline or cut out Nikki and Paulo redux. And the New Orleans storyline is just boring. Why are we introducing all these new characters now? Isn't that what the Heroes: Origins is for at the end of the season?

News and Notes:

Sox up 2-0 as we head to Colorado. Hopefully the Rockies can put up at least a little more fight. Only 2 runs so far this series?

Rangers off to a slow start. Best Defense and Worst Offense don't go so well together in the NHL.

How bout them Giants? Where did this come from? I don't know but I sure do like it.

Until next time:

"Why can't we just be here as concerned citizens of the world?"

"Because big daddy needs some new yarn."

"Just because there's a dead body doesn't mean you're going to get paid."

"Just because there's vodka in my freezer doesn't mean I have to drink it. Wait, yes it does."

Fisher Smash Star Trek!

2007-10-12T10:53:00.000-04:00

Ok, random news here:

Fisher Stevens has been cast on Lost. You may remember him from his many memorable sidekick roles such as trying to make Steve Guttenburg looks like a scientist in Short Circuit, trying to make Angelina Jolie look like a computer hacker in Hackers or trying to make the entire movie look like it didn't suck in Super Mario Bros. He's also the other guy on Early Edition. The one who didn't end up on Friday Night Lights.

Great news: Sonic the Hedgehog is in Smash Bros Brawl. Finally Nintendo fans can beat the hell out of that snotty blue bastard for all the "Sega Genesis Rules!" crap we had to put with in the early 90s. Ooh, my Mortal Kombat has blood in it. Yeah, well mine doesn't and the controls suck on both of them so bite me!

Not Great news: Smash Bros Brawl delayed until February 10th. Damnit!

Latest casting new on the new Abrams Trek movie:

Mr Sulu - John Cho. Any time either Harold or Kumar get cast in a role, I'm happy for them. Except in Superman Returns. Kumar really had no reason to be in there.

Scotty - Simon Pegg. That's just freaking awesome! Now cast Edgar Wright and Nick Frost at red shirts who get killed by Eric Bana. I'm begging you here!

Stop or I'll kick you in the testicles!

2007-10-09T22:10:00.001-04:00

It's been a while since the Mustard updated, but the historic collapse of the New York Mets down the homestretch sent me into a week long bender in Vegas. And no, the early exit from the playoffs of the Yankees has done nothing to staunch the steady stream of expletives pouring forth my mouth everytime the "amazin-s" are mentioned. We shall speak no more of them.

Holy Our Mother of the Lake! The Irish actually won a game! Against UCLA no less! It's a St. Patrick's Day miracle. No, I don't care to hear about the wretched play of the Bruins 3rd string QB. It's not my fault that we Carson Palmer-ed Ben Olson. I'm taking my win and hugging it tight. I've got some Eagles coming up on the horizon and am already dreading the thought of yet another year of my sister's victorious jabs.

Are Reaper and Chuck the same show? And who would win in a fight? Adam Baldwin or Ray Wise? I mean on one hand you've got a badass who fought Reavers and almost saved Data from Roland Emmerich and Dean Devlin's super-intelligent aliens who have never heard of a firewall. On the other you've got a guy who ran someone over with a Zamboni and feeds nuts to squirrels. Just too close to call.

Speaking of which Chuck is suffering from a main character who wants to desperately to be Seth Cohen, I'm amazed they haven't accidentally put Adam Brody in the closing credits instead of Zachary Levi.

I'm enjoying Dirty, Sexy Money but let's face it, these are not the Bluths. And yes, I get that it's more "serious" show but come on, you might as well start the show with "And now the story of a wealthy family who lost everything, and the one surrogate son who had no choice but to keep them all together". Damn you Fox!

$43 million. Will you stop giving money to the studios to make Resident Evil movies? You're only encouraging them! Go see the Darjeeling Limited and get some culture, you jackasses. And yes, I did just learn how to pronounce Darjeeling.

News and Notes:

I've realized that my TV week is anchored by Bones right now. I love the show but when it's reached pole position, I think there's something missing in the lineup.

Pushing Daises has whimsy and wonder not to mention a steady stream of dialog to make a Sherman-Palladino jealous. Now let's see them keep it up.

Eric Bana is playing the nemesis (No pun intended. No seriously forget that movie ever happened, I'm begging you) in the upcoming JJ Abrams Star Trek. You got to hand to him, Abrams can cast like no other.

Until next time:

"Sounds like you're a narcoleptic."

"I suffer from sudden and uncontrollable attacks of deep sleep?"

"What's the other one?"

"Necrophiliac."

"Words that sound alike get mixed up in my head."

"Me too. I used to think masturbation meant chewing your food... I don't think that anymore."

Tell me you've never dreamed of doing this

2007-10-07T18:56:00.000-04:00

-ahoy-matey.com

I'd hate to see the pursuit of a homicidal lunatic get in the way of pursuing a homicidal lunatic.

2007-09-18T21:16:00.000-04:00

Mustard: Who are you to say no?

So after long speculation and rumor, Spiral Frog has finally launched. For those of you who don’t know, Spiral Frog offers free DRM’d music downloads supported by advertising on the site. What makes it different than your usual “free” download site is that this site is actually backed by Universal Music Group so it has legitimately big artists available. Eschewing those, I gave it a try and was able to download and play with very little effort an old Phantom Planet album. However, ever since then I haven’t been able to access any other less than super popular groups on the site such as Kaiser Chiefs, Rogue Wave or (strangely enough considering it’s current radio airplay) the new Rooney album. I’ll chalk it up to the service only being a day or two old, but I’ll hold off on any real opinion until I can access all albums freely.

Rick Gervais nominated for an Emmy? Excellent. Ricky Gervais winning an Emmy? Outstanding. Ricky Gervais not being at the Emmys so presenters Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert give it to Steve Carrell? Priceless.

What the %^$# is up the Mets? Do they just not want to make the playoffs? They get swept by the Phils at home and now they get theirs asses handed to them by the Nats. The frakking Nats!? A team whose best hitter is Wily Mo freaking Pena!? Hang you head in shame “Amazins” and get your act together! As of the time of this writing the Nats have managed to pull at 4 run comeback and are sitting on top of the Mets, 8-7 and I swear to God the Nats' announcers actually seem sorry for the Mets at this point.

News and Notes:

Smash Bros has wi-fi without absolutely needing friend codes! And it has personalized taunts against those with friend codes! Giggity.

So I’ve never been a big Halo fan (no Xbox and all) but if the video making the rounds is really the ending of Halo 3… Bungie you have some juevos grandes.

Jim Broadbent as Rufus Scrimgeour in Harry Potter 6? I like it a lot.

Yes, I did expect Notre Dame to be bad this year. But what in the hell was that against Michigan? I thought they were supposed to improve after the Penn State game.

Until next time:

"And, you know, with the pain and the death, maybe you shouldn't be leaping into the fray like that. Maybe you should be... fray adjacent."

"Excuse me? Who, at a crucial moment, distracted the lead demon by allowing her to pummel him about the head?"

"Yeah, that was real manly how you shrieked and all."

In Memorium: Xbox 360s of the world

2007-09-13T09:10:00.002-04:00

-joystiq

Business is like a jungle. And I am like a tiger. And Dwight is like a monkey that stabs the tiger in the back with a stick.

2007-09-07T13:15:00.000-04:00

Mustard: Able to leap tall building in a single bound.

(trivia note: Did you know that Superman originally could not fly, just jump very far? The more you know…)

Football season is in the air. Ok, so it’s been in the air for a week now, but it’s in the air nonetheless. The Colts began their title defense in strong fashion last night by beating the ever-loving tar out of the Saints. Good gravy did Drew Brees look like he just didn’t care anymore by the end. And Jason David was starting to look like Wile E. Coyote with how badly those Colt receivers were blowing by him.

Sadly the Irish did not begin their year in so happy a fashion. The QB musical chairs routine reeked of uncharacteristic Weiss desperation and now that he’s been put in, there’s no way Clausen is coming out short of total meltdown. Hope he’s up to it cause this is not going to be a happy football year for Domers. On the positive side, we’re not Michigan. Hahahaha. So long, farewell to those title dreams.

Why must Apple tease me so? All I wanted was a wide-screen iPod. I don’t give a rats behind about all those iPhone features. But when they finally announce one, the iPod Touch, it only has 16 freakin’ GB of storage. I don’t care that it’s flash memory! Give me at least more than the 20 GB I currently have on my iPod “classic”! I want to be able to fit my music AND my movies on there. Damn you Steve Jobs!

News and Notes:

The fact that the Rock is starring in The Game Plan, which might give The Pacifier a run for it’s money in “action star attempting to grab a quick paycheck” territory, just makes me pray that Southland Tales ends up being a good movie.

“This is ouuuuuuuuuuuuur country!” Oh sweet merciful crap can we kill this song? I’m begging here.

Strahan back with Giants… good thing. Tom Coughlin still coaching the Giants… not so good.

Pedro’s back! And throwing a mighty fine game too even if it was just against the Reds.

Until next time:

“Listen up everybody, I'd like to make an announcement. Christmas is canceled.”

“You can't cancel a holiday.”

“Give it up Stanley or you'll lose New Years.”

“What does that mean?”

“Jim, take New Years away from Stanley.”

Look, I dont know if you were just looking for pimp in the phonebook and stopped at "PI."

2007-08-30T12:50:00.000-04:00

It's really sad that I just picked up both the new Matt Nathanson and New Pornographers and yet looking ahead at the next few weeks I'm seeing the Shout Out Louds, Rogue Wave, Iron & Wine, Matt Pond PA and Broken Social Scene and thinking to myself, do I really have enough music for now? As for the two new albums, I'm digging both. Matt Nathanson has the "unfortunate" position of growing in popularity and therefore growing in album production which tends to get in the way of the 12 string guitar and vocals that made his previous albums so good. That's not to say it's a bad album, far from it. But whenever I heard songs like Bulletproof Weeks it makes me realize how good a singer/songwriter Nathanson is and how I wish that the accompaniment would pull back a little on the rest of his songs and let Nathanson do his thing.

New Pornographers' Challengers... it kinda of makes me sick how much talent this group has. You could put these 4 albums on permanent loop in the player and I'd be a happy man.

I'm intrigued by Eastern Promises. David Cronenberg and Viggo Mortensen made an outstanding movie in "A History of Violence" and I'm liking the thoughts of them teaming back up. Add to that Naomi Watts who has yet to reach the point where I can't stand here anymore or what I call "Nicole Kidman" status. Here's hoping that Vincent Cassel avoids chewing every piece of scenery in the room (note: I like Vincent Cassel but the man seems to be aspiring to Nicholson level mastication).

Notre Dame season kicks off this Saturday as the Irish taken on the worst fans in the league in Georgia Tech (sorry Crowley but you know it to be true). I think this could be a decent season for a rebuilding year but Lou Holtz is out of his freaking mind if he thinks the Irish are going 10-2.

News and Notes:

Just finished off Veronica Mars Season 1 on DVD again. Keith Mars is without a doubt my hero. But good god that was one of the greatest seasons of TV ever..... DAMN YOU WB!!!!

Per Michael Ausiello the Halloween episode of Bones will be "wonderful". Tim Minear directing? Just throwing out blatant vicious rumors.

Speaking of my favorite show creator who just cannot catch a break, Minear has a new show at ABC called Miracle Man. Per Hercules at Aintitcool: "It’s about a disgraced ex-televangelist with no faith who starts performing real miracles." I'm going to rise above the easy pun here and just say, Tim, I'm rooting for you.

Until next time:

"Jake, when did we become Republicans?"

"We haven't. We're just going with the flow."

Emmys gain perfect hair, lost all credibility

2007-08-21T08:29:00.000-04:00

Ryan Seacrest? Are you kidding me? Look, I get annoyed at the Emmys just about every year but at least they've tried to remain semi-respectable with their hosts. Ellen DeGeneres, Jon Stewart, Conan O'Brian. There's a reason you go for comedians. They keep the awards from turning completely into one giant ass kissing ceremony by keeping the celebrities on their toes. But holy mother of Guadalupe, with Seacrest on stage? He's going to wet himself by the end of it. Why not just put Star Jones up there and get it over with?

I look like Manila Whore Barbie

2007-08-17T14:48:00.000-04:00

Mustard: Read it or else!

Stardust – Gotta say, really surprised how much I enjoyed this movie. This is the best “fairy tale” movie I’ve seen since Princess Bride. And it’s in that same vein, a fantasy flick (we don’t count the LOTR in the same group as that’s a whole ‘nother ball game) that is actually made for an adult audience. Intelligent, funny yet dark enough at times to really be truly good movie. Great cast with Michelle Pfieffer apparently deciding that she needed to make up for lost time (seriously, how many movie has she been in this summer?). Lead Charlie Cox plays his role well in the iconic hero’s journey from wide-eyed naivety to confident champion. Claire Danes is great in the part of the “damsel in distress” but not idiotically helpless or, thank God, post-modernly ironic (see Shrek). And Robert DeNiro…that man is just having the time of his life at this point. Plus throw in fun little cameos by Ricky Gervais, Peter O’Toole and Rupert Everett with the narration by Ian McKellan and you’ve got yourself a great cast. The score itself while not entirely original, is a real stand out and one of the best I’ve heard this year. It really makes me sad that this little gem of a movie is struggling at the box office while Rush Hour 3 is making untold riches and shortening the IQs of moviegoers everywhere. Hopefully it’ll find its deserved appreciation, like so many similar movies, on the DVD shelves.

So can I just say how funny I find it that Guitar Hero III made a huge deal out of getting Slash to be a character in the game. Fine, it’s Slash, I understand. But the next huge addition: Bret Michaels. Really? Of Poison fame? Er, they do realize that it’s called Guitar Hero, not Lead Vocalist of a Crappy 80s Hair Band Hero, right?

New and Notes:

Mets @ the Nats this weekend. And it’s Abraham Lincoln bobblehead night on Saturday to boot (you gotta love/shake your head at DC)!

James Marsters will be on Without a Trace this season. Still not gonna watch it, but good for him.

We almost had Kristen Bell on Lost. She’d rather do Legally Blonde on Broadway? So sad…

Until next time:

“Any idea what our parents do Mondays and Wednesdays from 6 to 10 that requires an overnight bag?”

“As far as I’m concerned they play bingo at the VFW.”

Stop, in the name of American prudishness!

2007-08-08T14:17:00.000-04:00

Mustard: With great power comes great responsibility… and a Spider-Pig.

The Simpsons Movie – Can’t help but feel a little let down after seeing it. Don’t get me wrong, it still had some hysterical bits in it. The opening church scene had some classic Simpsons in there and of course Ralph Wiggum (“I like men now.”). But maybe it’s just that after having become disillusioned with the show over it’s past few years to the point where I doubt I saw even half of last season, I had some hopes that they were gonna give us a reminder of the greatest of the show from way back when. And while there are a few of those moments, they sadly only push forward the fact that those days are really gone, probably for good. In one of the movie’s best moments Marge has a monologue directed towards Homer which eerily echoes the Simpsons fans feelings toward their one time favorite show. It’s a sentimental moment which once upon a time were a vital part of the best episodes of the show, getting the viewer to not only laugh with the zany antics of the cast, but also get emotionally attached and care about the Simpsons family. Unfortunately the past few years has been hard pressed to find a genuine moment when you could actually understand why in the hell Marge hadn’t dumped Homer years ago. In the end this movie was definitely better than any episode over the past few years, but at the same time cannot live up to the hype of nearly 20 years of buildup.

So Rob Thomas is now a consulting producer to Big Shots? If you haven’t seen the previews for the new ABC show, imagine a desperate attempt to create a “Sex in the City” for men. Did no one else really want Michael Vartan? Rob Thomas is going to have his hands full turn this thing around.

Brady Quinn finally signs with the Browns. As much as I like the guy, he doesn’t come out of this one looking so great. And before people jump on me about “well, he was just looking for incentives for playing time” it doesn’t matter. He’s missed 2 weeks of training camp with the team and with the Browns needing a legit quarterback, he was in great position to pull an Eli Manning and get in there to be immediately groomed for the starting position. Now he’s got all kinds of goodwill to make up.

News and Notes:

I still can’t really say whether or not the show itself is all that great, but I damn sure want the soundtrack to the Flight of the Conchords whenever it comes out. The songs are nothing short of brilliant.

Bonds hit 756! They hype can now slowly start to die! Can I get an Amen?

Does Mark Texiera joining the surging Braves make me a little nervous? Maybe…

Until next time:

“You've gone mad with power!”

“Of course I've gone mad with power! Have you ever tried going mad without power? It's boring and no one listens to you!”

Mario Paint + Mega Man II = Childhood Nostalgia

2007-07-27T16:20:00.001-04:00

Ah Mario Paint... how many hours did I lose to toying around with the music maker?

-nintendowiifanboy.com

I'm gonna go get some vegetarian chili before they get desperate and add meat.

2007-07-27T11:01:00.000-04:00

Mustard: Who could ask for anything more?

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Started Saturday morning. Finished up by Saturday night. I’m mighty impressed that Rowling managed to tie up as many loose ends as possible and yet the book did not come off in the least disjointed or feel forced. That is a major testament to her skills as a writer not to mention her planning of the series as a whole. She also proved the she could do just fine outside the normal HP school year format (though she does keep the time frame in tact). The story comes full circle. Characters finish their arcs in a satisfying manner. Some characters don’t make it. Some characters get surprising redemption. I was particularly satisfied by the conclusions of Snape and Neville’s arcs not to mention Kreacher's unexpectedly entertaining roles. The only knocks I can put in were that some of the deaths (and there are plenty) had a little less impact than others. I also thought she spent a little too much time with the Tolkein-esque journey through the wilderness. But in the end I have to commend Rowling for crafting a truly classic series of books which will entertain for generations to come. Oh and the absolutely hysterical and brilliant line by Mrs. Weasley in the next to final chapter. I’d also like to point out that (highlight to read): I was completely right in my July 21 review of HBP that RAB did in fact stand for Regulus Black (though Rowling even had the story behind that be unexpected and interesting).Sure after I posted that many people came to the same conclusion but I still have satisfaction of figuring it out when I first read it.Ha!

Now good look turning that whole thing in the seventh movie. Yikes, that’s a lot to squeeze in.

Watchmen casting news: complete non-A list actors. I have no problem with that. I enjoy Billy Crudup’s work and we’ll see how he works under all the makeup/CGI of Dr. Manhattan. Jeffrey Dean Morgan aka Denny will get to expand his range as he goes from Mr. Likeable to playing a complete a-hole in the form of the cigar chomping Comedian. Be interesting to see if the novel is actually adaptable.

News and Notes:

Simpsons! Simpsons! Simpsons! (“Spider-Pig, Spider-Pig, does whatever a Spider-Pig does.”)

I won’t lie, the new Reaper trailer had me laughing mighty hard. Damn you CW!

Ok, I get that Zemeckis is trying to push the whole CGI as actors thing and no doubt this all looks much better than Polar Express, but I do not understand why they decided to make some of the characters look identical to the voice actors with the lone exception of Beowulf himself. Honestly right now I feel like they did it just so they didn’t have to pay Russell Crowe a ton of money cause the character sure looks like him and not so much like Ray Winstone (who is actually voicing Beowulf).

Until next time:

“You can't kill me for being Krusty the Klown! I'm not him! I'm Homer Simpson!”

“The same Homer Simpson who crashed his car through the wall of our club?”

“Uh, actually, my name is Barney. Yeah, Barney Gumbel.”

“The same Barney Gubmel who keeps taking pictures of my sister?”

“Uh, actually, my real name is...uh, think, Krusty, think...Joe Valanchi!”

“The same Joe Valanchi who squeled to the Senate Committee about Organized Crime?”

“Benedict Arnold!”

“The same Benedict Arnold who plotted to surrender the West Point to the hated British?”

D'oh!”

I don't need your sycophantic laughter. I have some on tape.

2007-07-20T09:37:00.000-04:00

Mustard: Like a flash in the pan, er…dark.

Emmy time! Look I’m not gonna go crazy in depth about Veronica Mars once again getting screwed. Or the lack of anything Scrubs. Or Rome. Or Studio 60. I’m just going to make a couple of quick points:

So Two and a Half Men has become the new comedy that will always be nominated for everything. Seriously, it’s so good it deserved 7 noms? Fine. At least it’s not effing Yes Dear. Strange though how apparently the female cast members have suddenly stepped up their game to take 2 of the supporting actress nods? Guess it was a slow year.
Ricky Gervais nominated for Best Actor? Outstanding. Extras NOT nominated for best Comedy? A travesty.
Grey’s Anatomy and Heroes nominated for Best Drama ahead of Lost? A f$%#ing joke.
3 Grey’s Anatomy supporting actresses? Be serious.
Kiefer Sutherland was apparently nominated for his work in the first 4 hours of 24. Because everything after that was pure crap.
They seriously have not one but two awards for hairstyling? Further reducing all respect I have for the Emmys.

And that’s it for the Emmys. Thank you. Come again.

E3 a little underwhelming, no? Nintendo spent their entire conference showing clips of different news shows talking about the Wii. Then they spent a while on Wii Fit which I’m sure will sell a ton of units. But what about everything else? The announced Mario Kari Wii (with online play!) but only showed a short trailer. They almost completely ignored Smash Bros. The only really big info were the dates of Smash (Dec 3) and Mario Galaxy (Nov. 13). Metroid still supposedly coming out the end of Aug. Let’s see.

Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix: Really good. I’m getting used to the trimmings of the books that are increasing with each successive movie (as each successive book gained about 200 pages). The cast continue their strong performances. Alan Rickman gets just a smidge more to do than Goblet of Fire. Imelda Staunton and Evanna Lynch were note perfect as Dolores Umbridge and Luna Lovegood. Gary Oldman is excellent in his last role (depending on book 7) as Sirius. Some roles got trimmed to the point where it was almost distracting having as big a name in there. Helena Bonham Carter made an great Belletrix Lestrange but only has 2 real scenes. Not to mention Emma Thompson and David Thewlis came back for about 2 lines a piece. Ah well, it was a really enjoyable movie over all.

News and Notes:

Yes, I have in fact finished reading all 6 Harry Potters. Not too shabby for starting in June.

Bonds is now 2 away. Let’s just get this over with already, shall we?

It’s a little scary that we’re only a little over a month away from ND football starting up again.

Until next time:

“Bart, come with me. I'll take you to someone who will make you feel better.”

“Is it my rabbit, Cottontail? The one who went to live upstate?”

“He died, Bart. Dad buried him in the backyard. … But not in that order.”

You try finding a job with nothing on your resume but “Fake Ghost Pirate.”

2007-07-06T10:54:00.000-04:00

Mustard…knew I left it around here somewhere.

So yeah, been a while since a real update. Ah the joys of summer. But anyways, let’s dive in…

Transformers – “One will stand. One will fall.” Yes, they actually included that line in the movie. Look, I’m coming right out and saying this is a very dumb movie. For the most part it makes little sense. But it’s a fun friggin’ movie all the same. Come on, you have a movie based off a toy line of giant transforming robots. The fact that I enjoyed the hell out of it is a testament to just how much this movie delivers what it promised: explosions and giant machines beating the crap out of each other. The human actors don’t matter for the most part. Sure Shia LaBeof is a likeable enough dork who manages to get a few funny lines in. I still don’t understand why John Tuturro is in the movie but he’s chewing the scenery like Jack Nicholson’s worst nightmare. Jon Voight is just there being Jon Voight. Bay made a brilliant move in bringing back Peter Cullen to voice Optimus Prime because those lines in any other voice just would’ve sound idiotic. In Peter Cullen’s voice it’s just the way Prime talks. And look for a minor cameo by Mr. Tom Lenk (Andrew from Buffy) as Analyst #2. Oh and the voice of Jazz is none other than Eddie, the brother from Family Matters. Who knew? Michael Bay is smart enough to not take this one seriously (see a part in the movie where a character actually says “This is like a 100 times better than Armageddon!”). My only grip is that they really don’t spend a lot of time with the “characters” of the Transformers. A few of the Decepticons literally just show up for the finale (and the uber-product placement Transformers at the end are asinine. Even in a movie like this where everything is product placement.) So go ahead, don’t worry about seeing anything other than sh%# getting blown up, and enjoy yourselves.

With Studio 60 ending I have to admit I’m a little sad to see it go. The last episodes just seemed to be Aaron Sorkin letting loose and not giving a damn since the show wasn’t coming back and I think it made for a much better, more natural flow to the show. Intelligent comedy is a hard thing to come by these days and this show pulled it off well even if it was on it’s soapbox the entire time it was doing so.

Flight of the Conchords – Not sure if it’s brilliant or just stupid. The manager character, Murray, seems little too much of a rip-off of Ricky Gervais’ agent Darren from Extras. But the music has been friggin’ hilarious.

News and Notes:

E3 fast approaches. Though this year it’s a mini-E3 look for some big news to still emerge. Check out the Smash Bros site which is updated daily. Some really cool stuff coming down the line on that game.

Now the Zelda is over I’ve moved on to Super Paper Mario. The first boss was named Fracktail. How could this game not be brilliant? Also on deck: Order of the Phoenix.

Speaking of which, I’m blasting through the first 6 books. I’m 3 chapters into book 5. I’m going to do it by the 21^st. Only 1400 pages left to go!

Rangers picked up Gomez and Drury?!?! Holy $%@&!!! That’s it. If they can’t pull it off with these guys, they’re just not gonna.

Thanks to Erin I have joined the XM revolution. Ok, so maybe not quite a revolution, but being able to listen to the Mets game on the way home from NY made for a much easier trip.

Until next time:

“Matthew, don't take this the wrong way, but I love you.”

“Okay.”

“Did you take it the wrong way?”

“I took it to mean you're gay and you want me.”

Directed by Tony Scott

2007-07-05T08:40:00.000-04:00

- penny arcade

Look at that, you can see the four states that border Springfield: Ohio, Nevada, Maine, and Kentucky!

2007-06-19T15:58:00.000-04:00

So Twilight Princess has finally been completed. Great (though a tad easy) final battle though I must say, I was a little disappointed with the ending. You’d think a little more would happen. Maybe I’m just spoiled by the Ocarina of Time ending. Overall I feel like the game was a gorgeous game and helluva lot of fun to play but not nearly as hard as OoT. But then maybe I’ve just gotten a lot better at games. I played Link to the Past a few months back and just flew through that game (though it helps that I played it so much I still knew the answers to a lot of the harder puzzles). Anyways, if you still haven’t picked up Zelda yet and you own a Wii, get out there and buy it. It may not upset Ocarina of Time as the best Zelda ever but it’s a phenomenal game nonetheless.

And can someone please tell me why the hell you must be a member of ESPN Insider in order to read any of the articles on their website these days? For God’s sake, you need to be an insider to read a transcript of a Bill Simmons’ chat? This is why I head on over to FoxSports of CBSsportsline for coverage of anything major. At least on those sites I’m not paying for witty commentary on the Sopranos season finale. [Update: they did take the Insider access needed off the Bill Simmons’ chat, but it’s still a ridiculous number of articles closed off for non-Insiders].

Tech advice for you (sorta): If you have an auxiliary jack in your car for an MP3 player, please, for the love of God, don’t drop $18 on a Monster iPod car cable that just plugs into your MP3 player’s headphone jack. Just buy a simple 3.5 mm to 3.5 mm (or 1/8 inch if you don’t like that pesky metric system) cable for a couple bucks at any radio shack, target or electronic store. You will save yourself $15 bucks and get the exact same result. Otherwise you are getting ripped off.

Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer
Look, I know you have to make kid friendly movies and whatnot but good gravy. This was like a bad Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie. Honestly, Dr. Doom might as well be the Shredder. At one point I kid you not the line “Let’s go for a spin.” is taunted as he creates a huge whirlwind. Sure it had a couple of relatively funny lines and despite all my complaints, it was miles better than the first (which still ranks somewhere around Blade Trinity as the worst comic movie ever made… though I’ve yet to see Ghost Rider or Elektra). It’s so sad that the best FF movie is still The Incredibles. Maybe I’m just pissed off that I came for Galactus and all I got was a stupid cloud. It wasn’t even purple.

News and Notes:

If you haven’t read the first arc of Joss Whedon’s Buffy Season 8, you’re missing out. I’m just so sad that at this rate, the man is never coming back to TV or movies.

How great was Entourage’s Season 4 premiere? The last scene with Drama yelling out his one line in the movie had me rolling.

Well at least the Mets can beat the Twins. Seriously, the hell is going on guys? I know we’re completely reliant on our bats, but the past 2 weeks have been ridiculous.

Until next time:

“I'm not moving in with her, Drama, I'm just staying there 'til we leave to shoot the movie.”

“Yeah, and that girl from Silence of The Lambs is just "staying'" in that well.”

The Coen's are going old school

2007-06-15T07:45:00.000-04:00

Bout damn time. Great trailer for their upcoming "No Country For Old Men" Very much them getting back to their "Blood Simple" roots. Definitely excited for this one.

I'd Come Up With A Funny Title But I'm Too Busy Laughing My Ass Off

2007-06-07T16:06:00.000-04:00

-eonline

This is, I wanna say anomalous, but I'm going to go with weird.

2007-06-06T11:50:00.000-04:00

Mustard – now I want the burger to go with it.

So Sarah Silverman’s Paris Hilton jokes while hosting the MTV Movie Awards? Slightly awkward, no? Still at least she had the balls not to pander to the crowd. The pre-show was almost enough to make me not want to see the upcoming Transformers movie. And Pirates 2 winning best movie? Further proof American youth is made up of worthless peons.

Shrek the Third – What happened? Really disappointing. Couldn’t the writers have come up with something a little better than that? Sure it had a couple of funny moments (Gingerbread Man’s life flashing before his eyes was brilliant and Snow White happy animal song suddenly turning into The Immigrant Song was phenomenal) but I feel like it was one gag set piece into another. Not to mention the ridiculous amount of characters squeezed in just for the sake of having them (why bring Seth Rogan and Ian McShane in if you’re only going to give them 3 lines?). Maybe Shrek has just worn out its welcome and its humorous take on pop culture has reached its saturation point. Not looking forward to the impending train wreck of Shrek 4.

Have you seen list of composers for the new Smash Bros game? It’s a freaking Who’s Who of the video game industry. Sure it doesn’t necessarily mean characters from all these games will be in it but it sure gets the mind a-wondering. A Chrono Trigger character? A guy can dream.

News and Notes:

The overused buzz word for this month: Green Technology.

Entourage Season 3 is over…boooo! Entourage Season 4 starts in two weeks…yay!

How bout those Ducks?

You know if Roger Clemens doesn’t hurry things up he’s going to miss the Yankee ship before it completely burns to the ground.

Until next time:

“You ever hear of the theory that if you kill a butterfly in the past, it can drastically alter the present? Well who knows what else we changed.”

“Tonight on the Tonight Show, movie star George Clooney.”

“Oh, he's good.”

“Comedian Dave Chappelle.”

“He's funny, like him.”

“And musician Harry Connick Jr.”

“Wow, what a show.”

“And now, ladies and gentleman, heeeeeeeeeere's Chevy!”

“Oh god Brian, we messed up bad! We messed up real bad!”

Cary Brothers

2007-06-04T14:46:00.000-04:00

Ok, this has got to be rectified: people, the man's name is Cary Brothers. It's not like the Super Mario Brothers (though if you believe the movie they're names were actually Mario Mario and Luigi Mario. And Koopa was an evolved T-Rex. The f$%^ was Nintendo thinking?) Cary is his first name. Brothers is his last name. There's only one of him. And no, I don't know why he's singing about going to Canada. But apparently it's a simple place.

I think this time I'm actually gonna kill him... Yup, this is the one.

2007-05-29T22:47:00.000-04:00

Mustard: Giddy Up.

Wow, in one week we had polar opposites in season finales.

On the completely amazing end: Lost. I’m not just talking about the flash forward switch up (which was pretty damn ballsy on the writers’ part) but the entire episode just fit together to put next season on the must watch list: the other Others coming to the island, the fallout from the battle on the beach, Locke’s confrontation with Jack (and his vision of Walt), Penny having confirmation that Desmond is now on the island. Not to mention the other great moments: Hurley’s van to the rescue, Sawyer “not believing” Tom, and Charlie’s sacrifice. Rest in peace little hobbit. The flash forward only served to give a little confirmation that maybe these crazy writers do have a end game plan.

On the confirmation-that-this-season-was-a-complete-waste: 24. What the frack happened with this show? Everything gets wrapped up in a nice neat happy little package with the lone exception that Jack has decided to let Audrey go? Like we really gave a crap about this all season? Chloe’s pregnant? Originality just flows out of the pores of this show. I honestly think it would’ve been better if I just stopped watching after the bomb went off in Episode 4. Everything since then has just been worthless.

Veronica Mars: The last few episodes put that familiar edge back (Veronica’s revenge on the college dickhead who sent around the video of her and Piz). Another soft cliffhanger finale which would’ve been fine for a season finale but sure not a series. Go eff yourself CW.

So I watched Pirates of the Caribbean 2 this weekend and saw 3 in theaters. I gotta say, it’s lucky I had someone who was pushing me to go see 3 because Dead Man’s Chest was really really disappointing. From the 20 minutes of unnecessary cannibal shenanigans to the complete dumping on the character of Jack Sparrow (he was the lovable faux-cowardly scoundrel in the first movie. In the second he was just a cowardly douche bag) to the ambiguous romantic troubles of Kiera Knightley’s character (why exactly do we keep hinting at her wanting Sparrow over Will?). Sure the Davey Jones character was an excellent addition, the zombie monkey was hilarious and the last minute reveal of Barbossa was a great twist. But overall I felt almost every minute of the 2 ½ hour running time and didn’t enjoy myself nearly enough to compensate.

So I reluctantly was pushed into going to At World’s End a few days later. What a difference. Did the writers just get hit in the head a few times after the first movie and recovered in time for the third? Honestly, At World’s End fixes all the problem Dead Man’s Chest had and once again feels like the crazy, fun filled adventure the first movie gave us. Jack Sparrow is back to being completely insane and lovable again. The running time is still ridiculously long but you enjoy yourself this time. Sure the plot gets so complex at one point that you stop really trying to figure it out (which helps, because eventually it comes together somewhat coherently by the end) but the fun is back and that’s what matters. Jeffrey Rush’s performance is probably as enjoyable as Johnny Depp’s. The finale is the action packed special effects extravaganza that Spider-man 3 only wishes in it’s dreams it could achieve. The ending is not as perfectly happy as a normal Disney movie (though once again, stay through the credits). And the undead monkey pulls a gun on the parrot. What more do you want? If you loved the first movie and were extremely let down by the second, go see this one. You won’t be disappointed.

News and Notes:

Anaheim vs Ottawa? Not exactly a ratings juggernaut for the NHL. But I’m pulling for Anaheim.

Yankees are currently 14 ½ games out of first. Hahahahahahahaha. Welcome, Roger Clemens, to the pit of despair.

Why didn’t Peter just fly himself away on Heroes? I still don’t get it.

Until next time:

“And Ted, you'll be playing Blonde Doctor, get in character.”

“Ok, falling in love with you, long blond hair. Talking very fast. Talking very fast. Frick! Frick! Ok, I'm ready.”

Andy Bernard. Pros: He's classy, he gets me, he went to Cornell, I trust him... Cons: I don't really trust him.

2007-05-18T11:56:00.000-04:00

Mustard… me likey.

So NPD just released game console sales data for April and Nintendo has moved to the number 1 and 2 slots with the DS and Wii. What makes this important is that unlike the other consoles, the Wii is not a loss leader for Nintendo. Sony and Microsoft technically lose money on every PS3 and 360 sold and make up for it with software sales. But if no one is buying their consoles, they’re definitely not going to do that. Microsoft isn’t in as bad a position due to their year head start. But Sony is hurting right now (as their last financials revealed). Nintendo in the meanwhile is doing a little jib and singing “Money Money Money”. The key going forward for Nintendo is their software has to be as engaging as Wii Sports was. I may be looking forward to Mario Galaxy and Smash Bros. but the Gamecube sure wasn’t helped out by similar games. People are buying the Wii because it’s innovative as hell and Wii Sports is the best example of that. So Nintendo, I’m begging you, keep coming out with games like this that’ll have more than just the regular Nintendo Fanboy coming back for more.

Oh and for all you idiot “analysts” out there saying that Sony is already done, maybe you should try waiting a little. They don’t have a single killer app game out yet to drive sales. Once they get a couple of those out combined with an absolutely critical price cut (they’d be idiots not to at this point), Sony may just mount a comeback yet. Not saying they absolutely will but it’s definitely too early to call them DOA.

Caught a sneak preview of Knocked Up last night (gotta love living in DC. The drafthouse is just wonderful). As Erin put it, plotwise it’s pretty much Nine Months…only funny. That really sums it up nicely. That and the cast is a hundred time better. In the world of comedy: Paul Rudd > Tom Arnold. Judd Apatow is just a funny funny man and Seth Rogan is going to get a big a bump from this as Steve Carrell did from the 40 Year Old Virgin. He’s just a great lovable loser. Katherine Heigl gets to show a little more acting range than she’s allowed on Grey’s Anatomy. The cast of Undeclared is great as Rogan’s idiot stoner buddies. Alan Tudyk and Kristen Wiig steal the brief amount of screen time their allowed. Rogan and Rudd’s Mushroom-fueled trip through Vegas is going to be a classic in college dorms everywhere.

News and Notes:

GG and Mars are gone and with Lost and 24 (though I’m still on the fence on whether or not I want to give it another chance after this waste of a season) not coming back til mid-season next year, it’s amazing how free my schedule is gonna be next fall.

Shrek the Third not getting a ton of positive reviews so far. Between that and Spider-man 3’s the studios seem to be running out of luck on trilogies. Then again they’re making a ridiculous amount of money so odds are the studios just don’t give a damn.

Who dies on Lost next week? My bet is on Jack. I just think the writers want to do something no one will believe.

Until next time:

“How are you doing?”

“Not too bad, considering I just had a bomb dropped on me.”

“Oh no, that was bigger than a bomb, more like an asteroid about to hit the planet, you know? People running in the streets screaming "Oh my god, it's coming right at us!", and then dudes turning to hot chicks and being all like "Look, we're about to die so can I hit that?", and then the girls like "Hell to the no!", but then she realises, "Oh my god, I'm about to die, so you know what? Yeah you can hit this, but no kissing."”

“That's exactly what it's like!”

Veronica Mars Cancelled...

2007-05-17T13:19:00.000-04:00

F#@% the WB. F#@% them up their stupid a$$h0l3s.

When the Dark Comes Rising...

2007-05-16T16:20:00.000-04:00

So Harry over at Aintitcool posted a little teaser article for the upcoming Dark Is Rising adaptation. I just found out about this a few weeks ago and I'm pretty darn excited for it. I loved the Susan Cooper novels way back when and the cast of this has me a little giddy. I always pictured the Merrimen character as a little older and more looking like a Gandalf in the 20th century. But with Ian McShane I just don't care. He's perfect for it. Provided the profanity doesn't start spilling from his mouth. Christopher Eccleston as the Dark Rider? Brilliant. The man freaks the hell out of me and that's exactly what the Rider should do. The stills only add to the happiness:

- via Aintitcool

Must...Buy...Old Spice

2007-05-16T11:53:00.001-04:00

Just put the motherfrickin' ring on my motherfrickin' finger! Frick! Frick, frick!

2007-05-07T13:03:00.000-04:00

My Musssssssstard…

Spider-man 3: Ok, here’s the deal. I liked the first one. I loved the second one. This one was just sloppy. So much potential that just ends up going nowhere. Honestly, it’s like Sam Raimi, realizing that this was his last Spider-man, couldn’t make up his mind as to what story to tell and therefore put as much in as he could. The end result is that none of them integrated satisfactorily.

The black suit storyline – fine with it amplifying Peter’s already growing ego but when it eventually jumps to Eddie Brock to become Venom (a name never actually mentioned in the movie fyi) it’s suddenly super powerful. Well why didn’t we see this when Peter was wearing it? We’re only told verbally by Peter’s monologue that it’s powerful. The Sandman arc is done fine in that Spider-man needs someone to fight while in the black suit. But they overstep by giving Sandman a sympathetic villain arc which is just adds another plot and never gets resolved. It just ends. The Harry Osborn arc – I get that Raimi has been building this across all 3 movies but it doesn’t really fit in with any of the other storylines. It’s just there so he can finish it. Oh and the Emo Pete thing is ridiculous. Just because he’s “darker” doesn’t mean his haircut has to look like the creepy brother from the Wedding Crashers.

The ending also feels like a tacked on set piece that could’ve come out of a crappy Saturday morning cartoon written by a 5^th grader. Venom and Sandman team up, kidnap Mary Jane and actually taunt Spider-man to “stop us if you can”. No, seriously, this is actually written out on a web. Added to this is a horribly acted newscast just in case you didn’t get it the “gravitas” of the situation. Look, I get that a lot of comic book movies feel the need to put in “wink wink” moments but there are about 25 of them in this movie and they get old quick.

Before I completely turn everyone off seeing this movie (and judging by the opening weekend numbers there are only about 4 of you left), there are some good things. Visually speaking Sam Raimi is still on top of his game. The man just knows how to shoot a pretty looking move with originality and ingenuity in his angles and shots. He’s proven this with the last two movies and it continues here. The next man to step up to the camera for future editions has some big shoes to fill in that department. The actors themselves are good for what little character development the script gives them. JK Simmons should just be given his own movie. However again, there are some returns to the cringe inducing lines that were so prevalent during the first movie. The action pieces are fun and the usual Spider-man fare. The Bruce Campbell cameo is fantastic. I mean easily the funniest cameo he’s had.

In the end you’re gonna see this movie. I personally have no regrets about going to see it. It’s just not the big conclusion to Raimi’s trilogy that I was hoping for (and not just because the final shot is much less fun and heroic than the past 2 movies where Spider-man swings through NY). Now I’ve heard rumors that Raimi was essentially forced to put Venom in this movie (he’s stated multiple times earlier that he didn’t like the character). So maybe his initial movie was going to be tighter and more focused. Sadly we’ll never know. So go see the movie but just be prepared to be ultimately under whelmed and let down.

News and notes:

Damnit, the Rangers are out. Stupid Buffalo.

Elliot and JD again on Scrubs? Really?

Gilmore Girls is headed off into the sunset. Please don’t let the same things happen to Veronica Mars.

Until next time:

“Carla, you're in charge of the guest list. Just make sure that all of my friends are there! Ooh, and Naomi, that bitch from radiology. She's teased me for six years about how she's going to beat me down the aisle. Well she can suck it, her and her fat neck.”

“Invite Fat Neck, got it.”

“If you point out Fat Neck to me I'll keep asking her why she's still single until she cries.”

“Done.”

Breakfast of the Gods

2007-05-02T12:37:00.000-04:00

Born out of the same ilk as Fables, a web comic that begins with the murder of the Cheerio's Honey Bee by Frankenberry. Seriously, this is some twisted entertainment right here.

We have a lot of angry customers out there. This puts us at Threat Level: Midnight.

2007-05-01T16:51:00.000-04:00

Mustard like it’s 1999…

So with the release of Spider-man 3 this weekend I’d say it’s time for:

JEFF’S TOP 5 ANTICIPATED FILMS OF SUMMER.

Knocked Up – I’ll admit that I didn’t find The 40 Year Old Virgin to be the funniest movie in the history of all moviekind like everyone else in this world apparently did (at least until Borat came along). But I still think Judd Apatow is a comedic genius dating all the way back to Heavyweights (we don’t count nor do we ever mention the words “Celtic Pride”). Add that to a movie starring Seth Rogan and Paul Rudd (the best parts of Virgin) and Katherine Heigl (what is up with her and unfortunate hookups?) and I’m looking forward to this one.

Ratatouille – Brad Bird and Pixar’s last joint venture was The Incredibles. What more do I have to say?

Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix – I originally was not going to have any sequels on this list but the latest trailers for it have really got me excited for this one. This could be the best one since Prisoner of Azkaban.

The Simpsons Movie – Come on, you really didn’t think this wasn’t gonna be here? I have absolutely no idea if it’s going to be any good but the teasers have been all sorts of brilliance so things are looking up. Now if they just had Conan O’Brian helping them out with the script. I miss the good ol’ days.

And the 5^th slot belongs to… Nothing. I looked through the rest of movies and quite frankly, I just have nothing that really gets me jumping up and down. I’m looking forward to movies such as Spider-man/Shrek/Pirates x3. And I’m intrigued by things like Matthew Vaughn’s Stardust or Zach Braff and Jason Bateman in The Ex. And of course I’ll see Michael Bay’s pièce de résistance, Transformers. But I’m not bouncing up and down excited for any of them. So to make up for the lack of a fifth I give you:

JEFF’S TOP 5 FILMS OF SUMMER THAT PROVE HUMANITY’S PERCH ON THE EDGE OF OBLIVION

DOA: Dead or Alive – It’s a movie based on a martial arts video game notorious for its real physics engines designed around the female characters’ boobs. I shit you not. And it has Kevin Nash.

I Could Never Be Your Woman – Look, I realize that Hollywood won’t stop until it’s named a movie after every song Frank Sinatra ever sang, but when they name a movie after crappy late 90’s Cake-wannabe song, it’s for the studio heads to find something better to do with their time…perhaps jumping out high-rise windows?

I Now Prounouce You Chuck and Larry – A movie about two fire fighters (played by Adam Sandler and Kevin James) who pretend to be gay to get domestic partner benefits. Will Kevin James’ star ever stop rising?

Skinwalkers – IMDB actually lists this as James Isaac’s “followup” to Jason X. I’m sorry, but I just don’t think it’s humanly possible for a movie like Jason X to have a “followup”. Then again I didn’t think it was possible for a movie to rip off Underworld but Skinwalkers has me there too.

Bratz the Movie – Starring Paula Abdul….. I’m just eff-ing speechless.

News and Notes:

Why is it that every time I go to a Mets/Nats game it’s a one run, 5 hit affair? Seriously, the game on Saturday was less than 3 hours long.

Rangers fighting back against those Sabers. They can tie it up tonight.

Wow, Brady Quinn… just painful to watch. Ah well, he’ll end up just fine and now he’s not a quarterback on a horrible team who just gave it’s best receiver to the Pats. Sorry JaMarcus.

24… getting very very sleepy. Course crazy person Audrey is kinda funny.

Drive: Not bad and I’m kind of intrigued. Sadly it’s been canceled and now we’ll never know. Poor Tim Minear. He just can’t win.

Veronica Mars!!! Back tonight!!!

Until next time:

“I'm calling the Better Business Bureau.”

“Yeah? Well I'm calling the "Ungrateful Bee-otch Hotline"!”

...Hippies

2007-04-27T14:18:00.000-04:00

Normally I would never ever advocate supporting David Arquette... but this looks kind of amazing.

Plus come on, it's Thomas Jane!

Scariest Video Ever

2007-04-25T18:21:00.000-04:00

And yes I hope someday someone makes a music video dedicated to me.

Yahoo launches lyrics site

2007-04-25T16:54:00.000-04:00

How sad is it that it took the record companies this long to allow a major legal lyrics site?

http://music.yahoo.com/lyrics

I saved a life... my own. Am I a hero? I can’t really say, but yes.

2007-04-25T13:06:00.000-04:00

Are you frakking kidding me? According the Washington Post, the FCC is now looking to expand their powers to include being able to regulate violence on television including cable. Says FCC Chairman Kevin Martin: “Parents are always the first and last line of defense in protecting their children, but legislation could give parents more tools. I think it would be better if the industry addressed this on its own, but we can also give parents help through regulation.” Yeah, you know what the only tool a parent needs is? The power button on the remote control. It’s a very simple equation: Don’t let your 8 year old son watch 24. Also don’t put a TV in your 8 year old sons bedroom. And finally raise your 8 year old son in such a way where he realizes the difference between fantasy and reality. I know this is a very tough thing to do but if we just put the effort in, perhaps we don’t need the FCC completely overstepping its bounds. But won’t someone please think of the children!?

Alright David Wright, the 26 game hit streak was awesome. Now let’s get that power hitting going again, what do you say? And who would guess that Moises Alou would end up with the 3^rd best batting average in the National League? Mets are in town this weekend. Giggity.

Caught Stranger Than Fiction on DVD. Good, not great. Though the Spoon soundtrack is excellent. The music works amazingly well as a score, even with the lyrics stripped. Was Queen Latifah even needed in the movie? Nothing against her, but her part is relatively minor and truth be told, completely unnecessary to the plot. Just seems strange to put someone as high profile as her in that role.

Also this kicks ass:

News and Notes:

Yeah, I’m so far behind in 24 it’s not even funny.

Beginning to have Veronica Mars withdrawal. Please CW, please pick it up next year.

The sad part about playing Trivial Pursuit is realizing that the only questions I’m good at getting are the music ones. Still damn proud of nailing the Mark Knopler one though. (Also if the term “punk rocker” is used, the answer is Sid Vicious. And if the question asks for a continent, 9 times out of 10 the answer is Antarctica.)

Until next time:

“Jim, could you please inform Andy Bernard that he is being shunned.”

“Andy, Dwight says welcome back, and he could use a hug.”

“Ok, tell him that’s not true.”

“Dwight says that he actually doesn’t know one single fact about bear attacks.”

“Ok, no, Jim, tell him that bears can climb faster than they can run! Jim, tell him!”

“Andy... no it’s too far.”

“Damn you!”

There. No one liked my haircut so now they can all just suck it.

2007-04-20T15:14:00.000-04:00

Mustard: it does get a kick out of champagne.

In video game console news, first quarter console sales came out and Nintendo beat the hell out of everyone with over 1 million Wiis sold. This was second only to the Nintendo DS with 1.2 million sold (and yet I don't know a single person who owns a DS). Sony's PS3 is selling piss poorly comparatively with only 500,000 sold. It was outsold by the PS2. Sony, in full damage control/BS mode, has claimed that this is due to supply shortages caused by the European launch. This would be a fine reason if not for the fact that you can walk into almost any electronics store these days and pick up a PS3 easily. Maybe Sony should just admit that they don't have a single game to justify a $600 console. And yes, the PS2 is a great, cheap console with loads of great games. But I don't remember the original XBox schooling the 360 in sales nearly 6 months after its launch.

Rome: could have been one of the best series finales EVER. Honestly, the last name on the written by credits could’ve been Whedon, Minear or Espenson and I wouldn’t have been surprised.

Have you ever tried Diet Mountain Dew? It tastes like the water left behind by the melted ice in a finished margarita. Only without the hint of alcohol that makes you want another.

Um…so where the hell is Prison Break going with this?

Rangers: From not making the playoffs to sweeping the 3^rd seed Thrashers? Why not?

Mets are looking good. Congrats to David Wright for breaking the Mets hit streak at 25 games and counting. Now let’s get some of that power back, what do you say? Also we need desperately to get someone other than Oliver Perez on our rotation. Wherefore art thou Pedro?

Wow, A-Rod isn’t just saying “I told you so” to last year’s detractors. He’s saying “I told you so, now go f#$% yourselves!”. Good for him.

Random week, no?

Until next time:

"God, I can't believe I'm getting my C-Section today."

"Did, uh, did you forget to tell anyone?"

"No, I told the nanny to stay overnight and my mom booked a flight for next week and I'm meeting the O.B. at the hospital in two hours."

"Ah-hem."

"Did I not tell you?"

"You did not."

"I could've sworn I texted you"

Technically, I am in Human Resources, and Dwight was asking me about human anatomy. Um, I'm just sad the public school system failed him so badly.

2007-04-11T10:11:00.000-04:00

Mustard…with a vengeance.

So back from my little vacation to Italy and it was a fun mix of the old and new:

Old: Being an American high school student on a school trip to Italy
New: Wanted to inflict bodily harm on a multitude of American high school students on school trips to Italy.

Old: Going to a café in Rome.
New: Going to a café in Rome and being asked by a woman from Denmark what the current American market for Salmon was.

Old: Having pizza for dinner
New: Mistakenly ordering pizza for both dinner and appetizer (and eating both my shares might I add).

Old: Driving a car up mountain roads.
New: Driving a Fiat Punto up mountain roads while praying to the Almighty that the damn thing wouldn’t break down because the engine sounded like it was about to fall out of the hood.

So yeah, Italy was a helluva time.

So back to business:

Baseball season begins and though it doesn’t come close to making up for last years NLCS, the Mets 3 game sweeps of Cards gave me a little bit satisfaction. Now can their starting pitching survive the rest of the year? Can Pedro come back in July and make an impact? Man I hope so.

Hey people suddenly like A-Rod now that he’s doing well over the first 7 games. Can we please stop talking about the guy? It’s either he’s sucking or he never really sucked, just had a bad year/month/day whatever, time to move on!

Hot Fuzz: caught a sneak preview at the Arlington Drafthouse. See this movie. It’s by the guys who did Shaun of the Dead and it’s one of the funniest movies I’ve seen in a really really long time. Also sweet was that Edgar Wright, Simon Pegg and Nick Frost were onhand to answer questions. Really funny, cool guys despite the scary as all hell fanboys drooling all over themselves to ask questions, shake their hand, get and autograph and just become their bestest friend ever! Some people need lives. Desperately.

News and Notes:

So now the Rangers decide yeah, let’s play and made their way to the 6 spot in the East? Sure, why not?

How frak-tastic was that Nikki and Paulo episode of Lost? And ending that would’ve make Alfred Hitchcock Presents proud. (And yes, they’re dead per Mike Ausiello’s interview with Carlton Cuse).

Entourage made a brilliant return last weekend. The best episode of the year so far.

Until next time:

“Still no invite for me, huh?”

“Not from Vince. But we did receive an evite to Patrick Dempsey's house for running charades.”

Greatest...Reference...Ever

2007-03-23T09:32:00.000-04:00

- penny arcade

I could never do one of these on the SNES

2007-03-22T13:23:00.000-04:00

from bordom.net

And I'll get to sleep at night. The deep slumber of a father whose daughters aren't out being impregnated.

2007-03-20T11:21:00.000-04:00

THIS….IS….MUSTARD!!!

Rant Time: The Today show this morning had a whole segment on people getting scammed on fake designer purses on eBay. No kidding. If you get offered a $20 Kate Spade bag on the street, do you expect it to be authentic? Then why would you expect anything different from a similarly ridiculously discounted bag online? Then they went on about how these devious counterfeiters are actually going and charging prices that are only $10 or so less then a regularly priced bag. If that’s the case why in the hell are you risking being scammed in order to save 10 bucks? Just pony up for the full price and buy it in a store. Then the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard come out of Meredith Vieira’s mouth (and that says a lot): “This is a big problem.” Excuse me? A big problem? The instability and political turmoil in the Middle East is a big problem. Continued human abuse cases throughout the world is a big problem. Fake designer bags are a frakking asinine problem for people who have too much time on their hands. If you need more money for designer purses why don’t you help out that diplomat from Nigeria? He won’t stop emailing me.

Speaking of madness: Notre Dame? Hello? Winthrop? Hey, at least the women’s team knows how to win. And I can still root for the hockey team.

In the most obvious news of the day: In addition to the ongoing steroid “scandal” that has listed such names as Jose Canseco, John Rocker and Evander Holyfield, 11 professional wrestlers are now being investigated. Randy Orton! Kurt Angle! Say it ain’t so! Have you ever seen these people? Or how they disappear for 2 months and suddenly come back having gained 40 pounds of muscle? So what’s next? An in-depth congressional look into WWE match fixing?

News and Notes:

I have all my Elite 8 teams still in! Woo! My wife is still winning the pool! Damnit!

Duke: hahahahahahaha!

Rangers: In/Out/In/Out/In, the hell is going on with this team?

Until next time:

“So, for kicks you read...”

“Feminist trash. You know. Woman finds her power, leaves her oppressive husband, discovers freedom and fulfillment with an artist who knows how to cry and make love like an animal.”

“So, sex books.”

“Pretty much, yeah.”

It's a St. Patrick's Day Miracle!

2007-03-16T12:48:00.000-04:00

Per MSNBC.com:

"CBS on Thursday unveiled an agreement with YouTube, the online video site, to form a special web channel featuring clips and highlights from the annual "March Madness" college basketball tournament."

"Quincy Smith, president of CBS Interactive, said basketball fans would be posting tournament footage on YouTube in any case, and that the agreement reflected the media group's strategy to reach out to them rather than trying to discourage them."

A media company getting the fact that it can use the internet's most popular video sharing portal to increase it's market reach and consumer experience and even generate revenue? I think hell may have just frozen over.

A lot of people think that magic camp is just for kids. And that’s why so many other people in my class were kids…self-fulfilling prophecy.

2007-03-14T10:12:00.000-04:00

Mustard: It’s still here.

So this update has just been forever in coming, hasn’t it? Anyways onto…

MADNESS!!! Of the March persuasion that is. Look I agree that Syracuse probably got a bum deal. But it’s just pathetic of a coach to bitch and moan about it because in the end if they had played better basketball they wouldn’t have had to worry about falling off the bubble. They’re in the ridiculously good Big East which already gets a ton of teams in so when you only win 22 games and get bounced in round 2 of the conference tourney, don’t expect to be a lock to make the tournament.

I still need to fill out the bracket but can the Irish beat Oregon in Rd. 2? Hmmmmm…

Oh and someone PLEASE, for all that is good and holy, stop showing pictures of Joakim Noah. I can’t knock his basketball ability but holy crap, this could be the ugliest man alive. And it’s not just the sweaty, basketball playing look. I’ve see him in person at the airport. He is that ugly. Someone give the man a razor or at least wax his upper lip. He’s the got the ugly mustache-like growth of a 6^th grader whose parents haven’t bought him an electric razor yet.

Ok, this is ridiculous, Tony Almeida gets shot in the neck and is able to make a full recovery by the end of the day. Morris gets a power drill bored into his back multiple times and just a few hours later is completely up and running with no signs of pain whatsoever. President Logan gets stabbed in the shoulder with a fruit paring knife and is at death’s door? Come on 24! I can suspend disbelief just fine but at least let’s keep it consistent.

So my latest movies: Zodiac and 300.

Zodiac is one of those movies like the Aviator. I really enjoyed it, it was a bit too long as it seemed the director couldn’t cut anything out, and had good strong performances. It’s not Fincher’s best by a long shot but it’s still a good movie.

I don’t understand a lot of these negative reviews of the 300. It’s a great movie for what it is and that is primarily an accurate conversion of a graphic novel to screen. It’s all about the visuals. People keep ripping on the plot being thin. Well no shit, the plot is supposed to incredibly simple: King Leonidas of Sparta leads 300 soldiers to hold off an invasion by the innumerable Persian army. The movie has a lot more dialogue than its source material. The look of the movie is outstanding. It’s visceral, stylized and innovative. My only knocks on the movie are that some of the scenes added to movie from Miller’s original work seem a little weak. And in one scene, for absolutely no reason, the film’s composer pulls a Scorpion King and just out of nowhere inserts a sequence of cheesy 90’s power chords that just left me wondering “where the hell did that come from”? I still have my doubts that anyone can pull off a successful Watchmen movie, but at least Snyder has earned himself a go at it.

News and Notes:

While most people are looking at College Hoops right now, hats off to the Notre Dame hockey team, finishing up the year ranked #1 in the country. Now on to the Frozen Four!

Are people really looking forward that much to a Grey’s Anatomy spinoff? Really?

I’m terrified of what the Mets pitching rotation is going to look like this year. They better hope their bats actually manage to improve (which is actually a distinct possibility).

Do I pick Kansas to go the distance? Decisions, decisions…

Until next time:

“Yeah, I don't see what's insane about not wanting spiders to lay eggs in my corn flakes. That's how Carla's mom died.”

“No it wasn't!”

“You're supposed to be my best friend!”

Ah Billy! After the Arctic and the Pacific, you're my favourite ocean.

2007-02-28T14:59:00.000-05:00

Mustard: Who could ask for anything more?

So the Oscars have come and gone and the newest Best Picture is the Departed. Good for Scrorcese, I’m happy for him especially since he got his Best Director statue. I’ve yet to see the movie despite the fact that it’s been sitting on my coffee table for the past week but I’ll catch it soon enough.

Pan's Labyrinth totally got robbed. I love Little Miss Sunshine (go Alan Arkin!) but Original Screenplay completely deserved to go to Del Toro’s truly unique script. No real surprises other than Arkin’s win over Murray. And what the hell, Melissa Ethridge wins for Best Song? I’m still under the impression that unless the song is performed during the movie (ie not the end credits), it doesn’t deserve to be nominated. Otherwise it’s just a hastily written song (and 99% of the time complete crap) in an attempt to win an Oscar.

Speaking of Arkin, he’s just been cast as the Chief in the upcoming Get Smart movie. The cast of this movie is just mind blowing. Now just pray that the script is better than Tom Astle’s last effort, Failure to Launch, which was only notable for gracing the world with a naked Terry Bradshaw. I’m gonna go poke out my eyes now.

Venture Brothers is coming back! Season 3 and 4 have been greenlit according to the shows creators. Unfortunately, we won’t see a new season for possibly another year. What the hell people? I understand that since it’s a hand drawn show it takes much longer than the average adult swim show to create, but still, over a year? Boooo! Then again a big cheer for it coming back at all. Make way for the homo-superior!

News and Notes:

Alllllmost caught up on 24. My mini-marathon the other day has me hating hot shot, overly ambitious politicos everywhere. You’re putting the nation in danger, damnit!

So I just got into an old west style showdown in Zelda complete with bad guys going through saloon windows. I love this game.

Now it looks like the Rangers aren’t even making the playoffs this year. I hate sports.

Until next time:

“This was a gift from Lee Iacocca. Twenty year old, single malt, scotch.”

“Here is to Mr. Iacocca, and his failed experiment, the De Lorean.”

Dear Academy:

2007-02-25T23:55:00.000-05:00

Thank you for giving the Best Actress to Helen Mirren. If you had given it to Meryl Streep, I may have had to pull a Grammys ban on you. Thank you for making this much much easier for all of us.

PS Watch out for Jennifer Hudson's boobs. They look like they could be trouble.

Hiya! My name is Bob Kelso and I like whores.

2007-02-20T16:48:00.000-05:00

I got nothing but random Mustard:

I like Heroes and all but is anyone else praying that they kill Ando off? He’s officially surpassed the TV Stupidity Threshold and therefore is need of a good case of death. Also they need to watch out because quite frankly, unless they kill him off, Peter makes pretty much every other hero obsolete. He only need to be around someone once and can then permanently use their powers? While it makes for a cool scene (a la his smackdown with Isaac), he’s now officially more powerful than Sylar and that defeats the number one rule of superheroes: don’t have any one hero be stronger than the villain. Otherwise, why do you need the rest of them?

So how great was Whedon’s office episode? The last scene with Dwight chasing the bat around the kitchen had me rolling.

After tonight, there’s only one more Veronica Mars left before the CW puts it on a month long hiatus so it can broadcast a large pile of money being set on fire. Don’t cha?

I am so far behind in 24, I’ve probably missed three instances of Jack Bauer torturing someone and at least 589 usages of the word “damnit”.

It’s coming:

Zelda has slowly begun to consume my life. I’m ok with that.

Until next time:

“I am going to Europe, Richard. I am going to Europe, and I'm going to have a marvelous time. I'm going to get up at 10:00, and I'm going to have two glasses of wine at lunch every single day.”

“Only prostitutes have two glasses of wine at lunch!”

“Well then, buy me a boa and drive me to Reno, because I'm open for business!”

My hump, my hump, my hump, my hump, my hump, my hump, my lovely lady lumps.

2007-02-11T22:30:00.000-05:00

Dear Grammys:

This will be the last time we ever speak.

Go f$%# yourselves.

Most Sincerely,

Jeff

If you get a chance, read the Boondocks. Man that little kid hates honkies!

2007-02-06T16:37:00.000-05:00

Mustard: Just bringing it.

And the Colts take it home. I’m so happy that I don’t have hear the Manning/Marino comparison anymore, I could cry a little. And it’s not like the Prince halftime show was bad, it’s just that who cares anymore? They need to do something different to get people to do anything other than pay marginal attention to an overblown musical production featuring artists that most people don’t care all that much about anymore. And no, throwing multiple artists up there doesn’t make it any better.

Joss Whedon is off Wonder Woman. I’ve got mixed emotions here. Yeah, it sucks that the guy spent 2 years writing the script, finally getting something down and then being told the studio didn’t like it. But on the other hand, Whedon is spread too damn thin as it is. He’s currently writing the best comic on the market in Astonishing X-men to the point where I will actually buy it when it comes out in full trade. He’s overseeing the Buffy “Season 8” comic that launches soon. And he’s taking over writing duties on Runaways this spring as well as the new horror flick Goners he’s writing and directing. And to be fair, Wonder Woman is not the amazing movie character people are making it out to be. It peaked with a campy late 70’s Linda Carter version and the character has pretty much languished in the 25 years afterwards. It’s a Golden Age of Comics character that hasn’t reached the iconic nature that’s kept Superman alive, nor been reinvented and evolved to fit into the modern day like Batman. I’ve no doubt Whedon could’ve put an interesting spin on the character and if anything it hurts that he lost a major studio picture but in the long run I don’t think it’s going to be a huge loss for anyone. Cept maybe Warners.

Speaking of which apparently Goyer is off The Flash now? I’m a big fan of Goyer’s writing if not his directing (despite certain peoples’ arguments, I thought the 3^rd Blade was pretty damn bad. Of course it didn’t help that Wesley Snipes was phoning it in from some place very far away). Add this to the new (and probably overblown) rumor that Joel Schumaker is looking to direct a Sandman movie and Warner apparently have lost their freaking minds. They do realize that the super-grossing James Cameron Aquaman was a fake movie right? They don’t actually have a ton of comic-based hits.

And no I still haven’t forgiven Akiva Goldsman for Batman & Robin.

News and Notes:

Wow, Steve Jobs making a statement on his blog today about DRM. Effing-A Steve.

Studio 60 we hardly knew ye. Apparently NBC is shelving it after sweeps. It’ll return now in April though this can’t possibly be a good sign for a Season 2.

I’ve yet to have someone over who doesn’t enjoy the bajeezus out of Wii Sports.

Until next time:

“Mr. Franklin, do you have a girlfriend?”

“I have a lovely wife, Deborah.”

“But don’t you have girlfriends in Paris? Like, a lot of them?”

“Ah, well, that is a gray area of my life.”

I miss Dwight. Congratulations universe, you win.

2007-02-02T16:41:00.000-05:00

Who smokes the Mustard? We smoke the Mustard!

While I’m looking forward to the upcoming 300, if you really want to get your historical fix, tune into HBO’s Rome. It’s second season has continued to top it’s first season even without Ciarán Hinds excellent Julius Caesar. This show and Deadwood prove that HBO just can deliver quality programming with an attention to detail that surpasses anything you’ll ever find on network television (probably because there’s no way a network would put up the kind of money needed for these shows that aren’t going to find a mass audience.) Sure they’re doomed to short lifespans from the get go (This will be Rome’s final season and Deadwood only lasted 3 plus 2 HBO movies to finish the series off) but as British television has proved, sometimes a couple outstanding seasons at the top of your game is a better way to go then holding out too long leading to an inevitable decline (I’m looking at you Friends and ER).

Am I the only one dreading the Oscars for no other reason than Forrest Whittaker’s acceptance speech? Look, the man is going to win. He picked up the Golden Globe and the SAG award for his role in the Last King of Scotland. But did you see his speech during the Golden Globes? He hemmed and hawed and giggled and barely got anything out. I’m sure it was just a little camera shyness and maybe a little shock. But then he went out and did the exact same thing at the SAG awards! Forrest, please just write down your speech because it’s going to horribly awkward when the orchestra starts playing you off the stage on Oscar night and you haven’t even started your speech yet.

So I have yet to make up my mind completely about where the new Shins album falls in their catalog. It’s quite good but has some very different sounds thrown in there in addition to the traditional Shins numbers (Phantom Limb will get stuck in your head so quick you’ll hate that it took them so long to get this album out). Then again, I took me quite a few listens before I fell in love with Chutes Too Narrow and now it’s easily one of my favorite albums. There’s nothing wrong with having to work at an album a little before really appreciating its nuances. After a few more listens I’ll give my full review. In the meantime, don’t hesitate to pick it up. I mean come on, it’s a new Shins album. How else are you gonna get My Humps out of your head?

News and Notes:

Hey Studio 60, the getting locked on the roof gag? Lame!

How freakin’ hilarious was last night’s Scrubs? “You shall be called Slagathor.”

I think it’s safe to say that the Prince halftime show is going to be completely tuned out.

Oh what the hell, Go Colts!

Until next time:

“So what… You’re just going to mope around like the guy in… What’s that book when the guy’s mom dies and he comes back to Jersey? And he’s got that motorcycle sidecar?

“Garden State was never a book.”

“It wasn’t? Oops. So much for that paper.”

I don't even know what that means.

2007-01-26T06:29:00.000-05:00

I just couldn't resist:

Who robs cavefish of their sight? Who rigs every Oscar night? We do! We doooooooooo!

2007-01-23T09:50:00.000-05:00

It’s pretty incredible but I don’t hate the Academy right now. Never thought I’d actually say it. But the Oscar noms just came out and all in all it’s not too shabby.

High Points:

Little Miss Sunshine getting a lot of love. Best Picture, Original Screenplay, Supporting Actor for Alan Arkin (too bad they can’t show his best scene in the movie: “F#$% a lot of women kid, not just one woman, a lot of women”), and Supporting Actress for Abigail Breslin (who has officially become the “IT” young Hollywood actor).

Also a lot of love for Pan’s Labyrinth which is awesome considering its foreign heritage. Based on who it’s up against I think it has a real (and very deserved shot) at Cinematography, Best Foreign Language Film and hopefully Score.

Good for the Academy for recognizing some of the lesser known performances which don’t get the hype to make the Golden Globes (Ryan Gosling, Jackie Earle Hickey).

Martin Scorcese – The Quest Continues…

Low Points:

Look, I know as far as the movie goes, The Fountain pretty much served to confuse the hell out of people but there is no denying that from an artistic standpoint it was one of the prettiest pictures of the year. So no Cinematography? No Art Direction? That it didn’t get a nom for Best Score is completely ridiculous. Ditto Visual Effects (see below). And come on, Original Screenplay?

Since when did Visual Effects turn into let’s validate summer movies by giving them a chance for an Oscar. That Poseidon actually got nominated for an Oscar makes me want to cry just a little bit.

Meryl F%$#ing Streep.

But overall, I’m really looking forward to this Oscar night. And hey, I’m already 1/5 with seeing Best Picture Noms. Go me!

It all started, with a penny in the door. There was a hatred, I had never felt before.

2007-01-22T13:03:00.000-05:00

I want Mustard!

I can’t tell you how happy I am to not have to see a Bears/Pats Superbowl. What a Pats/Colts game, eh? I still can’t believe it didn’t come down to a Vinateri field goal as time expired but I’ll take the last minute drive by Manning.

TV is starting to rev back up after the winter hiatus. HBO in particular has been busy with Rome back for its final season and it’s lost none of the violence. Ricky Gervais’ Extras is also back and it’s first two episode featured an Orlando Bloom displaying a whole lot of jealous animosity toward Johnny Depp (“Willy Wonka? Johnny Wanker!”) and one of the funniest scenes on TV this year with David Bowie being inspired for an impromptu song by Gervais’ depressing feelings of selling out.

Oh and to the CW: F%#$ YOU! Are you freaking kidding me? You’re cutting Veronica Mars’ season short and putting an 8 week gap after sweeps to put on “Pussycat Dolls Present: The Search for the Next Doll”?!?! I hope whoever green lit this worthless waste of time and money comes down with a scorching case of herpes, I really do. Ricky Bobby is putting that voodoo on you.

But you know what? If they don’t renew either Veronica Mars and Gilmore Girls for next year, I’ll finally be able to not worry about tuning into the CW.

News and Notes:

How great was that Scrubs episode? The only downside is that I think “Guy Love” was the best song and I had already seen it. Still was pretty damn funny.

This is a little old but: Joss Whedon is directing an episode of the Office this year. I’m so happy. The episode should be airing sometime next month. (Also look for an episode directed by J.J. Abrams. Man, everyone wants a piece of the Office these days).

New Shins this week!

Adios Tuna.

Until next time:

“You've seen Star Trek: The Next Generation have you?”

“I haven't no.”

“Why your wife won't let you have it on, is it?”

“I'm not married.”

“Oh, your girlfriend then?”

“I haven't got a girlfriend, I live alone.”

“You're not married, you haven't got a girlfriend and you never watch Star Trek?”

“No.”

“Good lord."

For the last couple of months I have been adrift in a sea of puppy dogs, lollypops and let's face it, mediocre metaphors.

2007-01-17T17:24:00.000-05:00

Mustard: If not now, when?

So Terence Stamp and the Rock have been cast in the upcoming Get Smart movie? That deserves a “frakkin’ awesome” label. First off, I love Get Smart. My childhood contained an unknown number of nights watching Don Adams’ brilliance on Nick-at-Nite. So when they cast Steve Carell as the lead, it was like the curtain dropped in front of the chorus singing Hallelujah. They couldn’t have picked a better actor to fill Adams’ shoes. Anne Hathaway as Agent 99 is a great fit but come on, Terence Stamp as the villain? Boom baby!

So the iPhone huh? Well it looks great but no way in hell am I switching carriers and paying that much money in order to get it. Yeah, I know, you get your iPod and phone all in one but honestly, I don’t really care that much. However the good news is that this means they’re almost certain to release a new widescreen iPod only device in the next 6 months or so. Now that is going to be pretty sweet.

This will be the last time I mention this (until perhaps the Oscars in which case I’ll be extremely pissed) but what the hell people? Meryl Streep does NOT deserve an award for the freakin’ Devil Wears Prada. The movie was shit and she didn’t “shine” or do anything else but a bad Cruella Deville impression. I don’t care that it’s Meryl Streep. Stop giving people awards just because of who they are and give them to people who actually deserve it. Thank you.

Do yourself a favor and go get the The Crane Wife, the new album by the Decemberists. It’s outstanding. And I would note that the Crane Wife #3 which has been playing the past week on this site was just played on last week’s Scrubs. I’m ahead of the curve.

Caught Pan’s Labyrinth this weekend. What a good movie. Most of America won’t see it as it’s a foreign movie and who wants to read subtitles but if you appreciate movies that are done well in almost every aspect, you owe it to yourself to catch this one. It’s definitely up there for most beautifully shot movie this year and outstanding movie score. With this movie Guillermo Del Toro is making a statement that he is a filmmaker to watch. I may have enjoyed Hellboy but I recognize it for the fun popcorn movie it is. This movie is dead serious, unflinching in it’s depiction of the brutal end days of the Spanish Civil War and even it’s more fanciful fairytale escapism parts. Strange bedfellows? Absolutely but it’s originality works and if this movie was in English I guarantee you we’d hear it’s title being announced with the other Oscar Best Picture nominees. As such we’ll absolutely hear it during the Foreign Picture nominees and I can’t think of many arguments as to why it shouldn’t win.

News and notes:

So can I tell you how great I find it that Scrubs has become the most widely syndicated show on TV? I swear, it’s on at least 6 times a day. It’s fantastic.

Speaking of Scrubs, tune in tomorrow night for the Scrubs musical. If “Guy Love” is any indication this could be the greatest musical since Buffy.

Zelda makes me happy.

Darius Walker is leaving and with him goes the last of Notre Dame’s dependable offense. Next season is gonna be fun.

Until next time:

“Hi, cutie! Since you have so many balls, and too many toys can be over-stimulating for an infant, Brantley here was wondering if he could borrow one to play with!”

“Oh, that's funny, because Jack here was just wondering why the crazy lady who just spent the last hour chain smoking and talking on her cell phone while her kid ate sand would come over to two complete strangers and give them parenting advice!”

“Oh, oh! He also thanked me for not naming him "Brantley"!”

You gave away my cornbread recipe? And she put weed in it?! You don’t put weed in my cornbread!

2007-01-08T09:46:00.000-05:00

Mustard: Bringing in 2007 with a bang!

Wow, I know, how freaking long has it taken me to post again? Those darn holidays tend to make things tricky on the updating.

So first news: Wiiiiiiiiii! Yes, despite the ridiculous shortage, I managed to find a Nintendo Wii (along with an extra controller which was almost just as hard to find). So far it’s frakkin’ fun as all hell. I don’t know if Wii Sports was turned off the entire weekend of New Years. Sure the graphics are complete crap, but the creation of your own Mii which you play the game with is strangely satisfying. Bowling is just awesome. Boxing is remarkably fun despite all the negative things I’ve heard about it and I swear my arms haven’t had that good a workout in a long time.

Zelda is, well come on, it’s friggin’ Zelda. Of course it’s awesome. And I’m not even remotely far into it. The use of the Wii-mote is intuitive and really feels seemless as opposed to gimmicky. The graphics are stunning and considering it’s technically a Gamecube game, I’m really looking forward to what the system can push with a game built for it.

I’ve only gotten a game or so into Madden and it’s also fun though it’s taken awhile to get used to the controls given on how I’m so used to the old system. But the use of the Wii-mote to control actions such as hiking the ball is excellent. It’s so damn effective in fact that I was drawn offside on the first play of the game thanks to a fake hike by Crowley.

RIP O.C. Fox announced this week that the series will be ending at the end of February. It’s a little sad but to be honest, even though this season has been much much better than the past season, I’m still just not as in to it.

I think Erin put it best when she said yesterday how funny it was but of all the shows she’s missed during the break, the one she’s really missing is Bones. I totally agree. I just enjoy that show more than I should.

Of the movies I’ve caught lately, Charlotte’s Web was a good, relatively faithful adaptation of the book. Though I was slightly annoyed in that I feel like they made the goose less of an annoying know-it-all because it was being voiced by Oprah. Maybe it’s just me. We Are Marshall was pretty much the same movie you’ve seen a hundred times. It’s not a bad movie and has some good performances in it but it’s nothing you haven’t seen before.

News and notes:

Wow, was that ND game an ass whooping or what? The streak continues…

Wow, is the Giants game gonna be an ass whooping or what?

I really hope the Golden Globes isn’t an indication of Oscar noms because man, that’ll be a boring show.

Until next time:

“Dr. Turner said that I am a very talented young physician.”

“Jordan said I'm the only man she ever wants to have sex with.”

“Oh…”

“Aren't we sharing fantastic lies we choose to believe for personal reasons?”

Whoever said laughter is the best medicine, never had gonorrhea.

2006-12-11T15:01:00.000-05:00

Alright, I know that every year I maintain that I have no faith in the Grammys and that they are completely worthless and yet every year they find a new way to piss me off. This year it’s just knowing that, in the Best Group Pop Performance, Death Cab for Cutie’s gorgeous and haunting “I Will Follow You Into the Dark” is going to be beaten out by the worthless Black Eyed Peas “My Humps”. Of course it’s going to happen. And it’s going to make me want to find the a-hole who voted for “My Humps” and cause them permanent hearing damage because they do not deserve to listen to music ever again. On the other hand, maybe “My Humps” won’t win. There’s a small but decent chance that the Pussycat Dolls might win with “Stickwitu”. Urge to kill rising…

Once again the only category that I find slightly validating is the lone “Alternative” Music Album award where the nominees are the Arctic Monkeys, the Flaming Lips, Gnarls Barkley, the Yeah Yeah Yeahs and Thom Yorke. Gnarls Barkley will win obviously win.

Don’t get me wrong, I love the Gnarls album and it will probably win lots of awards if only so that all those worthless voters can prove how “hip” they are.

Other thoughts;

Anyone else notice that John Mayer’s “Waiting For the World to Change” is just the main riff from Marvin Gaye’s “Sexual Healing”?

Academy please note: Imogen Heap is not a “New” Artist. Also she’s much much better than James Blunt.

I love Dylan and his new album is very good but I’m pretty sure he could cough into a microphone for an hour and get nominated for a Grammy. Please note this rule also applies to Paul McCartney, Neil Young, Tom Petty and anyone who achieved musical fame pre-1980 and is still alive.

Seriously, “My Humps”? You nominated “My Humps”? The fu-

If you haven’t seen it yet, enjoy:

I’m so happy this show is back.

News and notes:

So ND vs. LSU? Interesting…

Ouch to Michigan. But come on, you had your chance. And wow, USC. Way to blow that one. You putz!

Hey, look at that! The Giants won a game! Knew they had it in them.

Comeback award of the year: Timothy Busfield on Studio 60!

Sam Raimi moves from superhero to, well, superhero as they announced he’ll be helming a new movie of The Shadow. Recast Alec Baldwin! He can do better this time!

“My hump, my hump, my hump! My lovely lady humps!” Seriously!?

Until next time:

“I was so obsessed with getting my J.D. that I never got a chance to do the things I really wanted to do. Start a family. See the world.”

“Punch a whale.”

“Nah, I punched a whale. Right in the face. Down he went, like Liston.”

I am fast. Just to give you a reference point, I'm somewhere between a snake and a mongoose...and a panther.

2006-11-29T16:27:00.000-05:00

Mustard, sure. Just no more turkey, please.

So rough loss for the Irish and the haters have commenced. I’ll say it right now: Notre Dame ended up over-rated this year. The only real quality win ended up being the GA Tech win. However, and I know everyone will call me an idiot for saying this, if Notre Dame had beaten Michigan, would everyone be saying how overrated and unworthy of a BCS game Michigan was? Look, the fact of the matter is that Michigan’s only quality win was over an admittedly over-rated Notre Dame. The only other tough game they really played was to Ohio State which they lost. Yeah there Wisconsin but seriously, they played an even easier schedule than Michigan so I don’t buy that. So Michigan, prove me wrong in your BCS game. That’s the real fun of the BCS: no more hiding behind an easy schedule for anyone.

Oh and Boise State? Attempt to play a real team and then we’ll talk about your “undefeated” season.

So I’ve caught up on the first 4 episodes of the O.C. to see if this “comeback” is real. It’s head and shoulders above the crap that was season 3 but I’m not ready to say it’s back just yet.

Heroes has officially got me. It’s a lot easier to hook someone when you have multiple episodes tivo’d for uninterrupted watching. Now which X-men will the rip off next?

Oh my God! You killed Ed Begley Jr.! You bastards! Just like Steven Guttenberg now that I think about it. Logan Echolls is my hero.

Caught The Fountain this weekend. I won’t waste a lot of time with a review as I’m still not even sure what I saw but I’m fairly certain I enjoyed it. This movie is a total mind trip. I haven’t been this challenged by a film since Lynch’s Mulholland Drive. I think Erin’s reaction at the end of it put it best: That movie was freaking weird! And she’s absolutely right. It’s not an easy movie and it’s damn near impossible to understand the whole thing. It’s got some great acting by Hugh Jackman and Rachael Weisz and the cinematography is absolutely gorgeous. So if you’re up for a movie that’s probably like nothing you’ve ever seen, give it a try.

And just cause it's fun:

News and Notes:

This just isn’t my sports year. I’ve accepted it. From the Rangers being swept in the opening round of the playoffs, to the Mets inability to go the distance, to the Irish failing to live up to the hype, to the collapse of the Giants, I’m just not going to win this year.

Can someone please explain to me the allure of shopping on Black Friday? I just don’t get it.

Peter Jackson: he’s not directing the Hobbit/ he is directing the Hobbit. Come on New Line, don’t be a bunch of asses. He only made you billions of dollars and gave you some actual credibility.

Until next time:

“What's you problem with a giant flat screen? I mean you love TV.”

“Yeah, but just because I love something doesn't mean I want it to be giant. I love grapes, you know, but I don't wanna sit down and eat one humongous ... no, that would be fun!”

Happy Turkey Day (aka no real post this week)

2006-11-21T11:02:00.000-05:00

Prestons do not go into the woods. A guy named Preston is gonna get his ass kicked by a squirrel.

2006-11-14T14:43:00.001-05:00

Ladies, ladies, ladies, the Mustard is in the hiz-ouse.

So much to talk about, so little time, so here we go:

First up, guess who got to play some Wii last weekend? During a quick weekend trip up to NYC, I somehow manage to convince Erin to stop by the Nintendo World Store where they had a whole lotta Wii demos set up. While I didn’t get a whole heckuva lot of time due to the large crowd there, I did get to play a little Wii Sports and Excite Truck.

I got some time in with the Bowling portion of Wii Sports and I gotta say, it was pretty fun. While the game completely eschews graphics for simple stylized (alright, I’ll admit, “kiddie”) visuals, the gameplay itself is sweet. Though it took to me to my last frame to even pick up a spare, I can see this as being a pretty darn fun multiplayer game. The ability to add spin to the throw by turning your wrist as you bowl, exactly like you would with a real bowling ball, is really cool. Add in the other games of Golf, Tennis, Boxing and Baseball and the fact that the game is an included pack-in game with the Wii and you’ve got a winner on your hands.

I got one race in Excite Truck and proceeded to come in dead last. But the control scheme is again unique and quite fun where you turn the “wii-mote” sideways and turn it like a steering wheel to maneuver. Given that I’ve never been a huge racing fan (exceptions being the Mario Kart and F-Zero series), I’m unsure if this is a must-have for me. But an awesome new feature that’s just been announced is the ability to use your own MP3’s to create a soundtrack for the game via an SD card. That’s a brilliant move and I hope we see a lot more of it.

So in general, the new controller is living up to the hype. I was pissed they didn’t have a Zelda demo up but then again, I don’t need a demo to know that game is going to absolutely own.

It’s funny, with all the craziness surrounding the PS3 Launch, I really don’t see a whole lot of exclusive launch games for it that would really make the system a must-have. Resistance looks pretty good but not really all that much better than say Gears of War on the 360. Maybe I’m missing something but I’ve yet to see a real reason to upgrade from the PS2 at this point. But then again with the ridiculous shortage of machines, that’s probably a good thing since most people won’t be able to upgrade.

You knew this was gonna be here:

Music You Should Be Listening To:

+/- (Plus/Minus) - Let's Build a Fire

The opening title track starts out as though it's being played over a gramophone before suddenly cranking out the horn section and guitars. Fadeout's minimalism feels like a song just constantly building until the very last minute when the drums and guitars explode into the picture. I'm still waiting for Steal the Blueprints to be released as Death Cab's newest single with its up-tempo guitars and backing vocals. Thrown Into the Fire has the synthy beats and sounds that are very reminiscent of Stars. An entertaining album from an off the radar band.

Ben Kweller - Ben Kweller

Things start off with the upbeat piano-fused, Run (which in no small way feels inspired by Springsteen’s Born to Run). Penny on the Track wins the Windows Down in the Car Award for this album with it’s quick, piano pounding tempo. Thirteen goes in the opposite direction with its simplicity being unbelievably effective. It’s repeating piano chords feed the songs multiple verses with no real chorus, only a simple harmonica interlude. By far my favorite track on the album. All in all a mighty fine album for when you’re looking for something a little different.

News and Notes:

South Bend was a damn fine time even if it was also damn cold. Good to finally see a win in the stadium again (haven’t seen one since my senior year). Oh and Erin nearly had a heart attack when Brady Quinn ALMOST got on our elevator in the hotel. We had to settle for the Irish D Line instead but he was that close to her!

Speaking of College Football, why why WHY couldn’t South Carolina have kicked that damn field goal!? That’s all we would’ve needed to put the Irish in really good position for a title run. Now Florida needs to fall flat before the season ends. Oh and props to Rutgers! Who would’ve guessed?

With all the shows getting picked up for a full season, you know what name I’d reeeeeally like to hear? Veronica Mars. Come on WB!!! Not just 3 additional episodes, I want the full season!

So is it really worth going to see Happy Feet in order to see the new Harry Potter trailer? That is the question a surprising number of people may be contemplating this weekend.

Until next time:

“Dad, you're eating Dr. Phil!”

“It's amazing, he tastes just like Jeffrey Tambor.”

There’s a loop people and I’m in it. Not only am I in it, I’m the big curvy part.

2006-11-02T10:45:00.000-05:00

Mustard: Catch the fever! Catch it!!!

So if I was Bernard right now, I’d be scared out of my mind. He’s the only Tailie left. Anyone else really really want them to start moving on the story here? I realize Lost is all about the mystery but if you’re going to introduce 13 new questions per show, maybe we can answer one or two? I mean yeah, we now know how the smoke monster killed Greg Grunberg but now we’ve got a pirate on the island? Let the Dharrrrrma Initiative jokes begin. Poor Eko. We shall miss him. This is the first time they’ve actually killed off a fan favorite. More power to ‘em.

Wow, John Kerry. Could that have been a dumber move this close to the election? First off, is him stumping for the candidates that great an idea? The guy isn’t all that likeable and quite frankly isn’t going to pull any fence voters. But wow, what a time to “botch a joke”. I say it’s all a conspiracy. I can see it now, a press conference is called where Kerry and Bush face off over the remark only to suddenly smile and hug each other with Karl Rove laughing in the background while good ol’ J.R. wails in the background “My God! Kerry’s screwed us all! Why, Kerry!? Why!?”

Damn you USC! You couldn’t just keep winning or at least lose to a legitimately good team like Cal? Now I have to worry about you coming into the ND game with possibly 2 losses which would make the game next to meaningless. You putz!

Prison Break is starting to lose my interest. They’re like Ricky Gervais. They take a long time to say absolutely nothing. At least Lost keeps you interested in adding in more and more possibilities. Prison Break feels like they’re just adding in more and more filler.

I think Bones has moved into my “most underrated shows on TV” list. It’s a procedural that has some great characters and introduces a lot of humor into an otherwise depressing subject area that prevents the audience from burning out on the darker aspects of the show *cough* Law and Order *cough*. Who would’ve thought David Boreanaz could survive an acting career past Angel? And Emily Deschanel needs to be put into the awards circuit. Her round circle with the 9 year old pageant contestants last night was priceless.

News and notes:

Back to the Bend! Making my first return visit to Notre Dame in 2 years this weekend for the UNC game. Giggity.

So the Wachowski Brothers: The Matrix, V for Vendetta….. Speed Racer? Apparently so. Coming summer of 2008.

Simpsons Tree House of Horror! This Sunday, Sunday, Sunday!

Until next time:

“It's no different than lying to a criminal to get a confession.”

“Or having Hodgins call the FAA with a fake terrorism tip.”

“He did what!?”

“Oh what? Now suddenly there's a line?”

If all the air around you smelled like pickles and there was no where to run, no where to hide, would you find that at all bothersome?

2006-10-27T10:39:00.000-04:00

Holy crap! It’s the 100^th post of the Mustard!!!!

It’s been a week now and yet the only thing I’m able to say is this: WAS CARLOS BELTRAN THE ONLY PERSON ALIVE WHO DIDN’T SEE THE 0-2 CURVEBALL FOR A STRIKE COMING!!!! WAINWRIGHT HAD ONLY THROWN THE SAME DAMN PITCH 10 EFFING TIMES THAT INNING!!!! Seriously, I’m still THAT upset about it.

And sweet merciful Zeus, could ND have cut that game any closer? I mean come on!

The only positive thing in sports for me the whole week was the ass-kicking the Giants gave Dallas on Monday.

SCRUBS IS BACK NOVEMBER 30^TH!!!! Now the bad news: it’s opposite Greys Anatomy and CSI. Thanks NBC. I’m sure the ratings this year will be huge. Frak it, I don’t care. I’m just happy to have it back. I was watching the episode where Turk proposes to Carla the other day and it made me miss the show so much it hurts sometimes.

I’ve been hearing a lot of complaints of people thinking the Office has gotten too zany this year but damnit people, just appreciate a good comedy while it lasts. Ed Helms love of the Cardigans last week was hi-lar-ious.

Um, so they average about 100 songs a season the OC but for the next mix they’re going with all covers? And not classic song covers, but covers of Modest Mouse’s Float On, Spoon’s I Turn My Camera On and The Killers’ Smile Like You Mean It? Is it really necessary to cover songs that are only a year old? And I’m sorry but we do NOT need another rendition of Phantom Planet’s California. It’s already been on 2 Mixes and with all the good music on the show that doesn’t make the mix, why push it on again? Um, and wasn’t Imogen Heap’s cover of Hallelujah supposed to be on the mix? Yet it’s not on the current track listing?

Buffalo tied the NHL mark last night by going 10-0 to open the season and still no one cares. Maybe they should bring back that totally awesome halo thing they used to put around the puck complete with the cutting edge neon tail when the put was shot fast enough.

News and Notes:

GREATEST GIFT EVER!!! Erin got me a copy of To Kill a Mockingbird signed by Harper Lee for our anniversary! How unbelievably cool is that?

Also those of you with speakers may have noticed my newest addition to the blog: song of the week. I figured if I was running that far behind with music reviews I could at least add a little something musical in here.

Factcheck.org – Please don’t vote uninformed…or solely informed from BS political ads.

And be sure to watch Lost next week because the rumors are that someone MAJOR is permanently checking off the island.

Seriously, I’m still that depressed about the Mets.

Until next time:

“Snakes are gross. Snakes are scary and slithery and do you know where snakes do not belong?”

“On a plane?”

“They do not belong on a plane.”

“It's not an ideal situation.”

“They do not belong anywhere except in cages, stuck in safes burried deep, deep underground. I hate snakes.”

“So I'm gathering.”

“With their gross no legged bodies and their scaly, scaly skin, and their wiggling and their hissing.”

“Okay, Lore, I respect your very valid feelings about snakes. But I have to say, we were fairly warned.”

“No. No. A movie should not just be its title. Driving Miss Daisy didn't all take place in a car, Dances With Wolves wasn't one long wolf dance. But this was nothing but snakes. snakes, relentless snakes, snakes, on a plane, snakes, snakes, snakes on a plane!”

A Wii Bit of Monday Happiness

2006-10-23T13:10:00.000-04:00

Ok, so I just had to post this because everyone hates Mondays but this is just wonderful:

The '70s had the Hustle. The '80s, the moonwalk. We have the faux-lesbian dance.

2006-10-19T15:37:00.000-04:00

Mustard: How could anyone ask for more?

So NBC announced it’s intent to overhaul the company’s spending including cuts in expensive dramas and comedies in the 8 to 9 slot. I can’t help but think that this bodes ill for Studio 60 as well since it’s pretty pricey and getting slammed in the ratings.

Venture Brothers just concluded it’s 2^nd season. The finale involved an epic battle between David Bowie and Iggy Pop, a riff on the Neverending Story and was pretty much just genius throughout. They better green light Season 3.

So Jeff’s Top 5 Most Annticpated Movies…For the Rest of the Year:

(in order of release)

Borat – I can’t help it. The trailer has completely won me over that this could be the funniest movie of the year. Sacha Baron Cohen proved he’s the man in Talladega Nights and though I never really got into Da Ali G show, I’m dead set on catching this.

Stranger Than Fiction – At first glance this is a Nora Ephron movie. But then you actually look at the production and you realize it’s by the same guy who did Monster’s Ball and Finding Neverland. Suddenly this movie has gotten a little more interesting.

Casino Royale – I desperately want this to be a good Bond flick. They’re overhauling the look, casting a new lead (and despite everyone’s complaints of a blonde James Bond, I think Daniel Craig has a very Connery look to him). I just worry that’s it’s still the same producers who have been steadily dragging this franchise down.

The Fountain – Darren Aronofsky directing a flick with Hugh Jackman and Rachel Weisz? I’m there. Despite the long (and I mean long) delays in getting the project off the ground, I have very high hopes for it.

Pan’s Labyrinth – Guillermo Del Toro is back and looking to prove not CG visual effects can be just as effective as George Lucas’ digital wonderlands. This has such a great twisted fairy tale vibe to it I can’t wait.

Other notables:

Tenacious D in the Pick of Destiny – Jack Black is hit or miss but I loves me some Tenacious D.

Running with Scissors – Brian Cox should just be in every movie (and usually is).

The Good German – The trailer just came out. Looks like Clooney is more and more trying to prove he’s Cary Grant incarnate. Love the poster by the way.

News and Notes:

If you haven’t caught the World of Warcraft South Park episode yet, please do yourself a favor and quickly go here and join the online sensation before we all murder you.

Anyone else wonder why hell Lauren Graham was even on Studio 60 this week as the host? They didn’t even mention her by name. Hopefully she'll have some point in next week's ep.

IE7 officially “launched” today. If you want a subpar Firefox clone, give it a try! Or better yet, just use Firefox.

Until next time:

“So...it's a cocoon...that flies...”

“Obviously!”

“I just realized...that makes no sense.”

“Duh! Monarch! Butterfly, butterfly cocoon, it's a theme thing!”

“Yeah, I get it, but why didn't you just make it look like a butterfly?”

“...Because that's gay?”

And get that security tape! I want a Quicktime of my minty-fresh entrance on my webpage by tomorrow!

2006-10-11T10:55:00.000-04:00

I love Mustard cause it’s so delicious! Gotta go Mustard!

So let’s jump into it:

Following up last week’s post on Robert Downey Jr. being cast as Tony Stark in Iron Man, the role of Jim Rhodes has also been cast: Oscar nominee Terence Howard. Frankly I’m a little disappointed. They already had the perfect man for the role of the future War Machine who is already comfortable acting in metal armor right here. But seriously, for a superhero movie they’re going very Batman Begins-caliber in the way of casting. Oh, have I mentioned the movie is being directed by Jon Favreau?

Nathan Filion aka Mal from Firefly/Serenity will be appearing in an episode of Lost this season! Frak yeah! According to TVGuide’s Michael Ausiello, he’ll be appearing in a Kate flashback. This man needs to be in more roles.

So need reasons why Veronica Mars is officially the best show on television right now? Ok, let’s just look at last night’s episode:

1. Dan Castellaneta of Homer Simpson fame (and they had him put in a D’oh!)

2. Ryder Strong of Boy Meets World fame

3. Samm Levine of Freaks and Geeks fame (why the hell did they cancel that show?)

4. The continuing use of the word ‘frak’

5. Keith Mars is a badass (yet a sensitive badass)

6. Wallace and Logan’s bet

WATCH THIS SHOW!!!!

Studio 60 has really hit its stride and I am going to be a sad person if they cancel it.

Heroes: Look, you’ve got a great cast and a great premise, now they need to get things moving. If it’s about superheroes you need to get them doing more. Audiences do not like plodding stories where the superheroes barely do anything. Just ask Ang Lee.

Caught the Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning on my day off this Monday and I think congratulations are in order. This is officially the first movie I have ever walked out of! This was just absolutely awful. This wasn’t a horror flick for scares. This was just “hey how can we think up the most twisted sadistic shit imaginable and put it on screen”? Basically it was a big “F you Eli Roth, look what we can do”! Hell I own the first Eli Roth movie (funny enough starring Ryder Strong) and I could not stomach this. Then again this was from the guy who directed Darkness Falls aka the movie with the Tooth Fairy as the villain.

News and Notes:

So the weaker shows are starting to drop off. Now bring back Scrubs!

I’ll be putting up top 5 anticipated rest of the year movies next week.

Did anyone else ever think they’d live to see the day when Nicolas Cage and Peter Fonda would be starring opposite each other in a comicbook movie?

Until next time:

“Yeah. You'll never believe it - a maid from our hotel in New York found the Flash card with all our vacation photos on it. Look.”

“Hot dog!”

"Hot dog"?

“It's an expression of excitement and enthusiasm. Joe and Frank Hardy and I used to say ‘Hotdog’ all the time while we were waiting for the car hop to bring us our malteds at the drive-in.”

I bent my wookie!

2006-10-06T12:23:00.000-04:00

Whoa, two Mustard posts in one week? Why? Cause I wanted to, that’s why.

So this is like a week old but Robert Downey Jr. has been cast as Iron Man. For those not in the know, Iron Man’s biggest character flaw is alcoholism. A little on the nose? Like a pink elephant balloon symbolizing the gay Republicans (it’s a Simpsons reference. No hate mail).

In the latest big movie stolen from a foreign movie, Scorsese’s The Departed opens today. It’s a remake of the Hong Kong flick Infernal Affairs. And it still looks awesome.

While I loved the season premiere of Lost, I think they need to give the fanboys out there a little love with an answer or two. I have no problem being strung along but I’m worried they might start alienating the average viewer who gets frustrated much more easily.

This is the single greatest thing I have ever seen in my entire life:

Ralph Wiggum for President.

Yeah at some point I will finish up the Ep commentary (I'm almost there, I swear) but until then check out Penny Arcade Love this site. One of my favorites:

Until next time:

“Did you make any friends?”

“Lord no!”

“Enemies?”

“Eh.”

“Well, it is a day that ends in a 'y’.”

Do you even know what diffident means? That's OK. That knowledge isn't really required for the retail doughnut distribution industry.

2006-10-04T11:43:00.000-04:00

I loves me some my Mustard.

So I was watching Veronica Mars last night with an episode dealing with a serial rapist, a mob murder, and the aftereffects of a suicide and thought to myself, “You know what we really need right now? A bunch of idiot teenage girls in pajamas discussing whether or not Veronica and Logan will last. That would just be awesome.” Someone tell me what the flurking schnit is up with the “aerie girl” roundtable going on during the Gilmore Girls/Veronica Mars Tuesday nights? You’ve got two of the most intelligently written shows on TV right now and we have to sit there and listen to a bunch of frakking airheaded teenyboppers gossip over whether Luke and Lorelei were ever right for each other!? What the hell kind of value does this add the damn shows?! Damn you WB/CW/Whatever the hell you are!

On the other hand, I felt a little bit better about the future of the Gilmore Girls after last night’s episode. I still miss the Palladinos but this did feel very true to their direction of the show. Oh and Veronica Mars? Still that good the 2^nd time around.

So after two weeks of Heroes I’m still not 100% sold on it but I definitely enjoyed the 2^nd episode. Hey there’s Greg Grunberg! It took an hour and 45 minutes but we finally got him on the show.

Now it’s only in beta (isn’t everything these days?) but gotta say, I’m so far digging the Songbird media player. Based off Mozilla source code (ala Firefox which you should all be using by now), it’s not only a normal digital jukebox but also a Web player. If you’re on a webpage that offers a downloadable song (like say carybrothers.com) it’ll detect the audio file and display it in a window along with all other audio files on the site and allow you to easily save them to your library. Plus you can subscribe to something like a music related blog and it’ll automatically download the songs similar to a podcast. Pretty darn cool if you ask me. It also had audio search engines built in. Give it a try.

Mother F#$^#$!!!! Both Pedro and El Duque out for the playoffs!?!?!?! The Mets are in deep effing trouble. Missing out on a major arm during the trade deadline isn’t looking so great now, is it? Oliver Perez after losing 3 games and being sent down to the minors is supposed to come into the playoff rotation and make an impact? To quote Otto: “Disappointed!”

News and Notes:

Lost returns tonight! For six weeks at least.

The hockey season starts up as well. Call me crazy but was there any hype for the season beginning? Hell I live in DC and didn’t see a single Caps ad or promo. I swear I sometimes feel the NHL is just giving up. That season off really helped things didn’t it? And last year totally made up for it. You putzes.

Until next time:

“And you call yourselves college men. Where are the posters of beer and half naked women?”

“Oh, it's behind the case of porn and my shot glass collection.”

Oh, but which door to choose? That one can have fun, surprises, and a year's supply of Turtle Wax behind it.... or the polar bear from Lost!

2006-09-29T11:20:00.000-04:00

Mustard: discuss.

Ok, so let’s jump right into things. Virgin Music Festival? Fan-freakin-tastic. The fact that Erin and I managed to worm our way up to about 20 feet from the stage during the Killers and the Who made it that much better. Honestly, best concert I’ve ever been to and yes, I realize that might be a little unfair as it was really more like 9 concerts but still, what a day.

Points on the day:

Kasabian was a great band to kick things off with as there wasn’t a huge crowd at that point.

I got to see the Who! And Pete Townshend is still a god on the guitar.

Killers were amazingly good live and played about 50/50 from their last and the upcoming album due out in October.

The Raconteurs – Jack White turned it up about 11 notches from their album. Also really cool cover of Nancy Sinatra’s Bang Bang (which you may remember from the opening credits of Kill Bill).

Gnarls Barkley – Cee-Lo is one charismatic mofo. Awesome watching Danger Mouse work. The whole band came out dressed as Romans.

Flaming Lips – Opened up with Captain American and Thor throwing lead singer Wayne Coyne, who was inside a giant hamster ball, out into the audience while a chorus of Santas and Aliens sang behind him. I cannot make this shit up.

New Pornographers – Performance of the day. Just an awesome awesome concert. Not as high profile as a lot of the others, just a solid rock performance that had you hanging on every song.

Oh and to top it all off we made it home just in time for me to see the ridiculous ND comeback of MSU. Go Irish!

So far the only pilot this year to really grab me has been Studio 60. Kidnapped was kinda whatever, I’m already getting this thriller formula from 24 and Prison Break. Heroes was enjoyable and I’ll stick with it for now but there was just something missing in the episode. Might be the fact that it was originally supposed to be a 2 hour pilot. Well let’s see how it’s looking after next week.

Returning shows have faired much better. The Office and Earl premieres? Hilarious. Greys Anatomy also has been coming back strong. Gilmore Girls? It was good but it did not totally allay my worries about a Palladino-less show.

And the best premiere of the year? Veronica Mars. Yes, I have seen it thanks/no thanks to MSN.com (it took me 40 freaking minutes to get the damn thing to play. Damn you Microsoft!). This show hasn’t lost a step since last season. Hell they actually explain what frak means in the show. They have a hilarious scene devoted to the habit of college girls laying out on the quad and the guys who go to watch them. My one qualm? Why the hell did they remix the Dandy Warhols theme? It’s super slow and not the exciting adrenaline pump that was such great lead in. Ah well. I swear this show is starting to pull away as the best show on TV right now. So start watching it!

News and notes:

Moving this weekend. 4^th time in 3 years. ARGH!!!

Have you been to “How It Should Have Ended” yet? These are awesome. Here’s one of my favorites:

Until next time:

“Okay, that's it. Back to the pool house, men. We have some serious
bucking up to do here.”

“I swiped some Scotch.”

“I'll reenact the Passion of the Christ.”

I insist you do something about this before I go out and find a stick and make it pointy and come and find your cubicle and poke you very hard.

2006-09-19T10:36:00.000-04:00

As most will attest to, I’m a pretty big proponent of home theater. I was the guy who people pointed at and laughed (or questioned my sanity) when they saw how big my DVD collection was long before DVDs became a weekly purchase for most of America. I’ve got the big 42-inch HD TV with the 5.1 surround and the upconverting component video DVD player (unfortunately my TV does not have a HDMI port, only DVI while my DVD player is exactly the opposite. And yes, I’ve tried adapters and have not been pleased with the results). So keep this all in mind when I say I just do not get the HD/Blu-Ray push going on right now. The ongoing format war is just asinine and automatically makes me not want one. The players themselves are ridiculously overpriced. And I’ll be totally honest, I just don’t think it’s that much better quality to warrant such an expensive upgrade.

Maybe it’s the retailers’ fault. Right after the Blu-Ray players first were released I went into a Sony store to see their display and instead of blowing me away with a movie that would properly demonstrate the potential of medium, they played a preview of Ultraviolet on repeat. Oh yeah, I’m all ready to plunk down $1000 now. But it’s been that way ever since. I’ve not once seen a retailer with a nice setup, plugging away Batman Begins in High Def. And honestly, the studios don’t seem to care. It’s not like I’ve seen a marketing campaign telling me why I should be spending $10 extra per movie to see them in “glorious” High Def. Hence another reason why I will never be shelling out for the PS3.

Caught Zach Braff’s latest The Last Kiss last weekend. It was good but not as good as Garden State which, unfortunately, is what it will inevitably be compared to. The cast is excellent with Jacinda “I Was On The Real World” Barrett of all people turning in an outstanding performance. Braff as usual turns in great work and the supporting cast of Casey Affleck, Rachel Bilson, Tom Wilkenson and Bryce Danner really shines. Random as hell Harold Ramis cameo in there to boot. The problem I had with the movie is it seems like there are just scenes missing that would give the audience a little more insight into the actions and emotions of the characters. Braff’s character is supposedly having a huge 30 something crisis about his girlfriend’s pregnancy yet I honestly never felt like he was conflicted or trapped enough push him towards his actions in the movie’s second act (keeping it spoiler-lite). It was just as if there were scenes that got axed that would’ve dug a little deeper into his characters mindset and allowed us to understand how he could do the things he does. Another problem was that you could really tell what parts of the dialogue were in there originally by Paul Haggis and which ones were tweaked by Braff and Braff’s dialogue come off smoother and much more natural.

Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip: Never been a HUGE fan of Aaron Sorkin. He’s kinda like Citizen Kane, I know it’s genius filmmaking but I just cannot get into it. But after catching the pilot I was pleasantly surprised by how easily I ended up enjoying it. Maybe it’s that I can easily relate to the fact that SNL used to be amazing comedy and has since fallen to tired sketches that, to quote the pilot, they're just gonna shove down our throats until we laugh. I like the characters, the premise, the dialogue. Will it sustain my interest? Who knows. But for now, it’s got my Monday night at 10 slot.

New and notes:

We’ve joined the Mac revolution: Erin is now the proud owner of a new 13 inch Macbook. Now I want to use it. (She also got a new video iPod with it…jealousy rising).

Mets clinch! It’s only been 18 years. Bout damn time.

Virgin Music Festival this weekend! Gnarls! Killers! Flaming Lips! The frakkin’ Who!

Until next time:

“Hey, I just asked Lars if he was seeing anyone special. He misunderstood and he might be filing one of those sexual harassment charges against me.”

“What?”

“And you, because I said you made me.”

Wii'd Off

2006-09-14T10:40:00.000-04:00

Why is Nintendo hell bent on giving me doubts on buying the Wii? I mean seriously, as of yesterday, I was sold, no questions ask, sign me up, I’m there. Then comes the announcements from today’s press conference…

First off price: $250. I don’t have a huge problem with this given the re-friggin-diculous pricing of the other two systems. Would I have liked to have seen it cheaper? Yes. But it isn’t a deal breaker. What I absolutely hate is that they are including only one controller and that it’ll cost $60 for another one! Look, one controller has been standard for a long time now but it’s stupid as Nintendo wants to get the whole family into the game. Why not include the 2^nd controller? But 60 effing dollars for another controller!? That automatically jacks the initial price up to a minimum of $310. Suddenly, we’re not so cheap anymore.

Next the launch date: November 19^th. Why the hell would you want to launch two days AFTER the PS3?! It makes no sense. Sony has already hung themselves out with a huge shortage of units. Why would you not want to steal their buzz by launching earlier than them with plenty of units to go around? Now everyone is going to be talking about PS3. Either about how great it is or about how crappy it is that they couldn’t get one. That hype will last a lot longer than 2 days and completely overshadow the Wii launch. But no, Nintendo still doesn’t get that it’s NOT the market leader anymore.

Launch games: Yeah, Zelda, I got it. Anything else? I’m sorry, Excitetruck doesn’t really get me all warm and fuzzy and Wii Sports is pretty much an expanded demo. Metroid 3? Coming out 2007. No mention of Mario Galaxy. Come on! Give me something here! I could also just be bitter that EA decided not to make NHL ’07 for the Wii. How could you not? They adapted Madden and methinks the Wii remote is a little more suited towards say SHOOTING A PUCK?

Finally the nickel and dime BS: Completely ripping off Xbox Live, you’ll be using “Wii Points” to buy things online. And of course by points we mean cash. Why can’t anyone just up and price the damn things without having to do some stupid point system where $1 = 100 points? Also, they’re going to charge points to download the web browser? Come on, if you’ve got wi-fi in your house, odds are you’ve got a laptop to use it. So then why should I fork over cash for a web browser (not the connection mind you, just the stupid web browser which on a computer is 100% free) to surf the net on my TV when I’ve already got internet access? Also launching the Gamecube version of Zelda on December 11^th? Couldn’t you maybe give parents who don’t want to buy the Wii a little more time than having to fight each other 2 weeks before the holidays?

So there ya go. Do I feel like spending $350 on launch day? Not particularly. Will I still do it? Probably. I’m sure not shelling out for those other systems and I’m honestly excited about the Wii’s possibilities. But damn you Nintendo, you can’t just make me happy to go out and buy one so easily, can you? God forbid you make things easy.

My Lincoln-Sense is tingling!

2006-09-12T16:06:00.000-04:00

Welcome to the all-singing, all-dancing, all-music (almost) edition of the Mustard. Figured it’s been long enough and my music collection keeps growing so:

So the HUGE Apple press conference was today. The big news: the current iPod is seeing an upgrade where it will be brighter and play games with an option for an 80 GB edition. Also a bunch of nano updates (colors) and even a new iPod shuffle (that thing is still around?). ITunes is also getting an update with higher res video playback, different views like cover view (so we’ve caught up to Windows Media Center?) and there’s also a service to find missing cover art (this is actually very cool). Even bigger, you can finally use your iPod to transfer content between computers (provided the computer is authorized on the same account, sorry people, no stealing your friends’ entire music collection just yet). This is going to make my life so much easier with my home and work computers.

And of course there are now movies… Disney studio movies to be precise. Now before you freak out it’s all Disney owned studios so it’s also Touchstone, Miramax, etc. 75 to start with and counting. I like the new releases being 12.99 preorder and first week and then moving up to 14.99. Best Buy does the same exact thing. And most titles (aka old titles) will be $9.99. They’ll be at near DVD qualities and in Dolby surround. But you won’t be burning them to DVD so start work on hooking up your computer to the TV. I like this price point better than Amazon's at least and F- you other Hollywood studios who want to charge normal DVD prices for downloads. If it’s of a lesser value than DVD (and, with slightly lower video res and no special features, it is), we shouldn’t be paying DVD prices. Moving on…

Now I’ve commented before on my near obsession with the Mountain Goats’ Sunset Tree album. Well here’s the video (unofficial I believe though I’ve yet to confirm that) to the fantastic song Dance Music:

Tremendous.

So October 3^rd is officially the day to lose money on music. We’ve got new albums coming out that day by Beck, the Killers, Jet and the Decemberists. Ouch.

Mark down your calendars: January 23^rd. The release date for the oft rumored new Shins album, Wincing the Night Away. Is it refreshing that there’s a band out there who isn’t releasing a new album every year or just frustrating cause the Shins are that good?

Reviews! Recommendations! Redactionals!

Snow Patrol – Final Straw

Alright so the album’s song Chocolate is getting huge airplay now thanks to the trailer for Zach Braff’s new movie The Last Kiss. And it should cause it’s a great song. The opener, How to be Dead has a nice easy pace to it reminiscent of a more produced Matt Nathanson track. Run shows a strong Coldplay influence while still managing to be better than anything on their last album.

Rogue Wave – Descended Like Vultures

This band has a good diverse sound that’s very Death Cab-esque. Publish My Love in particular has the pounding guitar interludes reigning back into a low key verses that Ben Gibbard has perfected. The acoustic California has some great, haunting vocals that a reminiscent of Lost and Gone Forever era Guster.

Art Brut – Bang Bang Rock & Roll

Take the sound of Ramones or the more contemporary Franz Ferdinand, add a satirical disdain towards self indulgent rock while somehow celebrating it at the same, and you’ve got the entertaining debut of Art Brut. We Formed a Band nails this one the head with lyrics such as “And yes, this is my singing voice. It's not irony and it's not rock and roll. I'm just talking to the kids.” But the real gem of the album comes from My Little Brother with its biting guitars and straight minded lyrics of “My little brother just discovered rock & roll”. Great album.

Cat Power – The Greatest

The title track (and opener) is one of the strongest piano pieces I’ve heard in a long time. Living Proof livens things up with a more blues-crossed-with-gospel influence. Empty Shell swings into a more country mood that could’ve been pulled off of Bright Eye’s Wide Awake It’s Morning. Strong recommendation for this album.

Well that should hold you up for a while. True I’ve gotten a helluva lot more music than that since last I updated but we’ll get to that later.

News and non-music related Notes:

Speaking of The Last Kiss, it’s out this Friday. I’m quite looking forward to it. I’m not a HUGE Paul Haggis fan (though his guest appearance on Entourage brought me closer) but I’ve heard Zach Braff did a little work on the dialogue and if nothing else his writing on Garden State was excellent.

2 day countdown to Wii Day. Supposedly the big announcement of the price and date will happen at Nintendo’s press conference on Thursday. Rumored pricing of under $200. Please let it be true…

Joss Whedon, master of all that is good, has been announced as the new writer of Runaways taking over for the departing Brian K. Vaughn. Whedon’s run on Astonishing X-men was the reason I actually started paying attention to comics. I’ve read Vaughn’s first 2 volumes on Runaways and it’s excellent and I think Whedon is the only reason that fans of the series aren’t going to go on strike once he leaves.

Go Irish!

Until next time:

“Peter, what is that?”

“Well, I got the idea to build a panic room after I saw that movie The Butterfly Effect. I thought, wow, this is terrible. I wish I could escape to a place where this movie couldn't find me.”

Hello, my name is Cliff. I'll be your "if you can't afford an attorney" attorney.

2006-09-05T15:01:00.000-04:00

Mustard: Surprise Frittata Edition

So back from a crazy weekend down in Atlanta. Damn good to hit an ND game again. But my oh friggin’ my was there a lot of whining and bitching going on. First off: the game. I think I was the only ND person in Atlanta who didn’t think the Irish were gonna walk right over Tech. Am I the only person who remembered last year when they took out #16 Auburn on opening day or how bout beating #3 Miami late in November? Oh and both of those were on the road. And you know what? Tech is not a bad team this year. Now that said, was it a pretty game for the Irish? Absolutely not. For the first half Quinn couldn’t get settled to save his life and Darius Walker seemed to juke himself away from every open hole. Oh and we can’t kick a field goal. But great play by Quinn to get that TD with no time outs left in the first half. And then came the call…

Sweet mercy crap people, the hit on Quinn did NOT cost Tech the game. Was it questionable? Yeah. But one play does not make a game. And don’t blame the refs for “favoring” Notre Dame. Look at the penalty breakdown: 11 on ND for 80 yards, 5 on Tech for 28. Twice as many penalties for over 3 times as many lost yards and ND was getting all the calls? Hell, 2 of the Irish penalties were called right after the Quinn hit. If your offense can’t score more than one touchdown and a field goal, don’t expect to beat a team which is quite frankly better than you.

And that brings me to my other problem: the Tech fans. I’ve been to just about every type of sporting event under the sun. I’ve seen all kinds of fans. I have no problem whatsoever with the back and forth ribbing between opposing team’s fans. Hell, that’s some of the best part of the game. And sure there’s always some drunk a-hole on both sides that goes too far and you have to expect it. But Tech fans were easily the worst fans I’ve seen and I’m from NY. Yelling obscenities at a 70 something couple wearing ND T-shirts? Legitimately trying to start fights while walking by an ND tailgater? Hell, after one exchange I saw an Notre Dame fan say “good luck with the game and enjoy your afternoon” and give a knuckle bump to a Tech fan who put on a look of disgust saying “Ew, don’t f%$#ing touch me!”. And during the game? Throwing trash on the field after the Quinn hit (when you didn’t know it would lead to anything other than the Irish not having to kick a field goal right away). Throwing trash on the field after the Irish TD? Throwing trash on the field after the game? Real classy people. You don’t have to cheer when things go badly for your team but grow up and try not to embarrass yourselves.

As for the Tech football team: good job. You scared the crap out of most of the ND nation and made sure people aren’t going to dismiss you anymore. The defense was vicious in getting to Quinn. Really if Tech can open up another receiving threat so that Johnson doesn’t get double teamed all the time, they’re gonna be a nasty team for anyone to play.

Changing leagues, the NFL starts up Thursday leading to the big game on Sunday between my Giants and the Colts. Clash of the Titans or Fraternal Ass-kicking? We shall see.

News and Notes:

Special thanks to Crowley for the lodging and setting up the gratuitous drinking over the weekend.

Looking to get rid of some of those crappy CDs you bought impulsively in the musically challenged 90s? Give Lala a try. You can trade away some of the more embarrassing discs in your collection (why did I buy Blink 182’s Take Off Your Pants and Jacket, why?) for something you may actually want now.

Supposedly Apple will be announcing a new iPod this month. Unfortunately, it will probably end up being a new 8 or16 GB nano.

Things that really annoy me: Celebrity Playlists on iTunes where the “celebrity” puts their own music on it. How obnoxious is this? And you wonder why musicians get pegged as being narcissistic and self serving.

Until next time:

"In the spirit of full client/investigator disclosure, I'm not offering you this beer out of the goodness of my heart."

"You're not?"

"Nope. I'm fulfilling a long-time fantasy of sharing a cold one with my favorite ball players. And after we're done, we're gonna play catch in the parking lot."